No Trash For the Trash Man…

Charlie and Old Fuss and Feathers were in extraordinary moods tonight. As you already know, Charlie and my father bring meals every Sunday night. I obfuscated things somewhat asking for a plain single with cheese for Maggie, but they got the order right. Charlie took Maggie’s water bowl into the kitchen to empty and refill it.

“You didn’t leave me any trash to take out tonight,” he said almost mournfully. 

Dad was getting Maggie stirred up on the couch. She was really “talking” to him.

“She’s been a good companion to you all these years,” dad said.

“She’s my Magster,” I replied as I bent over and hugged her. “I don’t know what I would do without her. Thank y’all for getting her a burger tonight.”

“If you lose any more weight, you are going to waste away,” Charlie told me which made me feel good.

They soon left and Maggie and I settled in and ate our burgers. Mine was delicious, A Wendy’s double with cheese and Maggie’s was just a plain single with cheese with none of the fixins. I told dad before he left I had about filled out on the fill-ups from KFC.

Dad broached the subject of Christmas Eve before he left tonight.

“Now, you can come, but there is going to be a lot of people there,” he said. “I thought that would make you nervous.”

“Let’s have another Christmas at Andrew’s house afterwards,” I told my father.

“Charlie and I will bring your gifts and I will bring you a big plate of food,” he said.

“Sounds good to me,” I replied, content with the arrangements.

Two Thirds Capacity…

That’s right. We have twenty dogs in the kennels right now and it makes my job that much harder. I started cleaning at nine and didn’t finish until one. I had to work over today. I was pooped out by the time quitting time rolled around. I kept hoping for some adoptions today, but few people stopped by to look in the kennels. I want them all to find their forever home. We have a very mötley crüe in residence at the moment – all kinds of dogs. 

“Don’t forget to take your medications,” Tracy said when twelve arrived.

I like to see her play an active role in my recovery. I had them in a pill bottle in my pocket. I thanked her and went into the bathroom and poured me a cup of water. I began to feel much better on the drive home. Less fatigued and busy minded. My medications quiet the noise in my head. Tracy gave me a kiss goodbye and said she wished she could come home with me.

“We could nap all afternoon and laze in the bed,” she told me wistfully. “I really need a nap and a cuddle badly. I am so drowsy!”

Alas, Tracy had to stay on and work until six this evening. I hated to leave her, but I was ready to get home to my Magster. I was also starving and stopped by Wendy’s on my way back to mi casa and got Maggie and I a double/w cheese. Last night’s was so good I had to get another. Maggie will eat everything but the pickles.

Despite eating such fattening food lately (sparsely), I was able to fit back into my flannel scotch patterned pajamas last night. It was luxurious. I was overjoyed and Charlie remarked upon how much weight I have lost yesterday evening. I’ve been losing about one pound a week lately.

Old Fuss and Feathers Gives In…

I have an allowance now. I feel like some kind of child or a teenager to be honest, but I was glad to get it. Old Fuss and Feathers decided to give me $40 a week (after I begged him).

“The first sign of drinking and I am taking it away,” he told me last night very sternly.

“I won’t let you down,” I told him giddy with glee.

I feel as if I won the lottery to put it frankly. It was a big step for my father, but I have worked hard for it staying on the straight and narrow and religiously taking my medications. I told him I could find a way to drink if I wanted to money or not. Charlie was in my corner last night about it telling my father to trust me. This opens the door to Charlie giving me money from time to time again. I always vehemently refuse, but he insists. Before dad took control of my disability money, Charlie would always give me $20 when he saw me as a gift.

Trouble in Paradise…

9:00 pm rolled around and Charlie and Papa still hadn’t arrived with my and Maggie’s meals. I tried calling my father but it dumped me into his voicemail. 9:30 pm came and soon they pulled up to the curb. That's the latest arrival of them all. Maggie had been looking out the window for over two hours. She just went nuts and never gave up hope that they would arrive. I told her they were coming too early.

“We were caught in the drive-thru from hell,” Charlie told me.

“I got to thinking y’all had a car accident,” I replied.

I had ordered Wendy’s (a double/w cheese) tonight and thought that might have been the hang up, but it wasn’t. It was that dastardly KFC who always gets orders wrong and has a slow drive-thru. I’ve deemed them the screwiest KFC in the South. Horsefly has to have their chicken tenders thus the reason Charlie and Papa put themselves through that every week. They consistently cause problems.

Maggie was really “talking” to Charlie and Papa tonight. It always warms my heart when she does that. She was so excited she was almost beside herself. She doesn’t get to see them nearly enough as she wants to.

It has been a quiet day other than tonight’s little SNAFU. Charlie brought breakfast about 9 am – three sausage biscuits and a diet Coke. I drove over to my father’s house after finishing breakfast. He had his Christmas tree up and lit and I helped him decorate it. It really looked beautiful. Dad inherited mom’s beautiful ornaments and decorations. I always get a live tree so I have to wait until mid December to get my Christmas tree as they dry out so easily. I am hoping Kroger sells Christmas lights so I can decorate my shrubbery and step railing tomorrow night after we buy groceries. My neighbors across the street are putting on a grand show with lights and Christmas icons that are projected on the side of their house.

Marital Bliss…

I drove over to Charlie’s new house this afternoon to see what was going on. There is always something interesting going on at Charlie’s house. He had a carpenter installing new kitchen cabinets today. They were gorgeous.

“I am getting a new glass black top stove after this,” Charlie told me. ”Just like yours, Andrew.”

“I don’t know how we are going to afford it,” Charlie’s frugal wife said looking at me.

I chuckled and Charlie jeered and mocked Janice playfully.

Janice needed something from Charlie’s other house, the house by my father’s, so we set off on a mission.

“Get you two diet Cokes out of the fridge before we go,” Charlie, the feeder, told me.

“You know?” I said to Charlie. “My grandmother always said everybody needed to be married at least once for the lessons about life it teaches you.”

Charlie laughed and agreed. It certainly was true for my ex-wife and I. It will teach you temperance quickly.

I happily obliged about the diet Cokes. They were ice cold, crisp, and delicious. We got in Charlie’s Caprica and away we went. I sat in the running car while Charlie brought out a big box of various things and put them on the backseat. I should have gotten out and helped him.

“You hungry?” Charlie asked as he got back in the car. “Let’s run down to McDonald’s and get us a big Big Mac.”

We got Janice and the carpenter something to eat as well after a phone call to see what they wanted. I headed home to eat my extra value meal thanking Charlie so much for lunch. The smell of that McDonald’s food about drove Maggie crazy. There was some serious begging going on and a pout when she didn’t get enough. 

He's Not All That Bad...

I was sitting at the computer this afternoon when Maggie went apeshit bananas barking and whining. This could mean only two things. Charlie or my father were here. Maggie always had a more female reply to my mother's arrival.

"I thought I would surprise you and Maggie," my father said. "Here are you two Cokes already cold, your cigarettes and some lunch."

I had never seen Maggie happier.

"What did you cook?" I asked my father hungrily and eagerly.

"I cooked your favorite thing," he replied. "I cooked my pork chops and rice."

"There goes my diet," I said with a hearty laugh and then I gave my father a big hug.

Dad sat down for a minute as Maggie intently fawned for his affection.

"We go see Dr. Edwards (psychiatrist) Friday," dad told me. "You can get your two steak biscuits, or is that off the diet?"

"I will eat one instead of two," I said smiling at my father. "We can't get too austere."

Just one will be half my calories for the day.

"Can I run over to the Piggly Wiggly and buy some eggs?" I then asked my father.

"You sure can. Bring the receipt by to me on your way home," my father replied.

I am following Glittermom's advice and am going to eat two eggs every morning for my breakfast. The bagels are already in the freezer.

My father took a look at my medications and felt much better. I had taken my noon dose as planned and my nightly dose was awaiting to be taken.

Not My Usual Modus Operandi...

"Are you hungry?" I asked Maggie about an hour ago.

She knows that word well and licked her lips in excitement. My stomach was grumbling something fierce as well. I am unfortunately out of eggs, cheese and bacon. I drove down to McDonald's and got us a couple of egg McMuffins, an orange juice for me, and some hash browns. Maggie gobbled her's up like it was her last meal and then she wanted mine. Dog logic.

Because He's My Main Man....

One of the worst feelings in the world. 

The head honcho himself has just left the premises.  We got Whoppers and onion rings for today's treat. We also got one hell of a gigantic coke much to my supreme delight.

Yes, it was Charlie. He had been painting his new house and his clothes had paint all over them. I rushed out to the car excited to greet him as Maggie barked fervently inside as well.

"Are you taking Horsefly to the movies?" I asked seeing the paint.

"I paid Mrs. Sandra to take him for me," Charlie replied.

Mrs. Sandra was my mother's best friend and she is getting my car when my father finally hands over the keys to mom's car which he says will be soon.

"Hey, Mr. Charles!" I loudly said smiling as he laughed.

One thing about Charlie is that he trusts me unlike my father. Charlie just put all my numerous medications in a Ziploc bag and handed them to me. He didn't come inside to make sure I took them.

It also makes me realize that I take a shit load of medications when you look at the bag. I didn't realize it, but I take five Klonopin every day. No wonder I get withdrawal symptoms when I don't get them in a timely manner every afternoon or evening.

"I just got a ticket driving Erin's car for having an expired tag," Charlie told me with a frown before he drove off. "I went over and got your daddy's car."

That explained why Charlie was in my father's Honda.

I've Felt Broken Down Myself a Few Times as Well...

The phone rang and it took me a second to recognize the voice. It was Charlie's wife, Janice. This bode unusual and extremely out of the ordinary.

"Charlie's bringing you supper," she said. "But he forgot to take his phone with him and Erin's (Charlie's granddaughter) car is broken down 30 miles south of Atlanta. She says she feels entirely unsafe."

Charlie arrived with a Big Mac value meal, giant Coke, and medications. I walked out to his car to see if he needed help bringing anything in and he did. We had my six nightly diet Cokes to contend with as well.

"Call your wife," I said handing him my cellphone once he got inside. "Erin's car has broken down south of Atlanta."

Charlie told me to dial the number and then hand the phone back to him.

"Meet me at the end of the driveway with my phone and a glass of tea," he told Janice and he was on the way to rescue his granddaughter.

I told Charlie I would be glad to go and help him. If it was a flat tire, then that would be right up my alley. Charlie was worried about how my medications would affect me if I had to drive.

My Poor Dear Charlie and Dear Horsefly...

On the way to Horsefly's matinee, Charlie pulled up in front of my house this afternoon and it was taking him a long time to come inside. Maggie was having a fit at the chance of seeing Beta dog. I walked out to his car to see what was going on. My first thoughts were that he was just talking on his cellphone as my father often does in these delays.

"Dammit to hell," Charlie said harshly. "Horsefly blew chunks all over the back of my car."

Charlie was trying to clean it up with fast food napkins he had in his car. I ran inside and got a bucket of hot water with just a dash of Fabuloso. I got several wash cloths and a towel as well and I also grabbed a clean t-shirt for Horsefly.

"He wanted a regular Sprite so bad and I let him have one," Charlie said. "I should've known this was going to happen. That's why I only let him drink Sprite Zero. He can't take all that sugar in those regular sodas."

We got it cleaned up with a little elbow grease and spit and polish. Charlie came inside and we took my medications. He had also brought me a Big Mac value meal which I devoured after he left before the fries could get too cold. The extra large Coca-Cola was just icing on the cake. All's well that ends well as the old saying goes.

Before Charlie left, I asked him what he does those hours while Horsefly watches his movie.

"I hit all the antique shops around town looking for bargains," Charlie said. "Angela's Antiques is my favorite shop."

Three Chocolate Chip Cookies for Me! Whee!

Papa and Charlie have just left and stepped out the door. I have never seen Maggie put on a show for them like she did tonight. She's still got some puppy in her just yet after all these years.

"You get three cookies tonight, Andrew," Charlie told me with a smile. "We never eat them anyway."

You better bet I was thrilled.

Dad and I settled into the couch to dole out medications while Maggie continued to put on a big show for us on the rug.

"Look at her go!" dad said laughing as Maggie playfully teased us and barked.

"I think she is just a little bit excited about y'all's arrival," I replied feeling much warmth in my heart. "She's sat snugly on the couch cushion in the window for two hours waiting on you all. I made the mistake of telling her Charlie and Papa are coming hours ago."

"Andrew, your house looks so clean and it smells wonderful," Charlie told me from the kitchen which made me beam with pride.

Charlie set my four Pepsi's and my pot pie on top of my entertainment center along with three KFC cookies.

"Maggie's got fresh food and water as well," I told Charlie beating him to the punch.

What did Charlie do? The house was clean so he started to clean my fridge and my freezer. Dad rolled his eyes at me as Charlie went rummaging through my refrigerator.

"Damn, I wanted to go eat my chicken before it got cold," my father whispered to me looking completely disgruntled.

Notes From the Medication Chronicles - Big Macs, Charlie, and Crazy Meds...

Mom's car pulled up out front. I hadn't been long out of the bed. I scratched my head till Charlie came stepping out of the car. It seems Charlie's Caprica is on the fritz and he is borrowing mom's Civic from my father.

"Andrew!" Charlie jubilantly exclaimed. "I've got medications and McDonald's."

It was no sweeter sight than I had ever seen. Bless you, Ethos and bless you, Charlie!

Charlie laid my medications and food on top of my entertainment center to take and eat at my own leisure and got to cleaning my kitchen. I didn't protest this time. I needed some help.

"How are you, Andrew?" Charlie asked as he broke down cardboard coke containers that had accumulated on top of my fridge.

"I'm fine," I told Charlie. "What's wrong with the Caprica?"

"The timing belt broke," Charlie said which is a major cost to fix and he's lucky if he doesn't have broken valves. "It seems my car is not very well built. I want another Chevy HHR."

Charlie got over 350,000 miles out of his last Chevrolet HHR. Dad would joke that if he ever turned it off then it may not crank again.

"You could get mom's car and dad could buy me a new 2017 Honda Fit!" I told Charlie whimsically.

Charlie laughed as if I were living in some fantasy land. The base Honda Fit costs $16,000.

"Call me if you need me!" Charlie said as he hobbled to the trashcan with three bags of trash. "Love you!"

Hardee's Parting Shot at KFC...

Hey, it even comes with a cookie as well!

The Man with the Plan...

"I took a different route home this evening down hwy. 280 and up the interstate. I thought I would stop and get your favorite chicken sandwiches," Charlie told me walking across my yard. "You get Chick-fil-A tonight."

I thanked Charlie profusely and welcomed him inside for a moment. Maggie was putting up a fuss to see him.

Charlie then started looking for a stick and something to scrape his shoe with.

"What are you doing?" I asked Charlie as he sat down on my front steps.

"I just stepped in some goddamned dogshit in your yard!" Charlie exclaimed huffily. "Well, I'll be damned!"

It took all I could muster not to burst out laughing. It was the way Charlie said it. Charlie and my father have been known to have potty mouths.

"Well, it couldn't be Maggie as she only shits in the backyard," I replied not helping much.

Charlie took off his shoe and got to rubbing it in the grass until he was satisfied his loafer was clean.

"Bless your dear heart, Charlie," I said with a chuckle as he came inside to see Maggie.

Charlie's duties never end. Janice will have given Horsefly a bath this evening and they will soon be on their way to the bowling alley. They also have a stop at KFC for Horsefly's nightly chicken strips.

Giddy Up and Go...

500 GB solid state drive for games

My package left New Jersey and is in transit at the moment. It will most likely arrive in the LaGrange facility over the weekend which is just up the road from me. I know I won't get them until next week, but I am holding out all hopes for Monday. The Papas optioned for the free shipping which slows things down a bit.

Charlie called a moment ago and said he should arrive around seven with my medications, cigarillos, and diet Cokes.

"And yes, I am bringing you Arby's," he said with a laugh. "Don't eat something and ruin your supper."

Charlie talked about getting Horsefly to the bowling alley on time tonight and then got off the phone. I offered to take Horsefly bowling, but Charlie said it would interrupt his usual routines and Horsefly is resistant to change.

4 Terabyte drive for data storage

Happy Days Are Here Again!

My father and my brother fly out to St. Louis in the morning. Papa was very excited by that little adventure. They are going to see the Auburn vs. Mizzou game. Dad asked me if I wanted to go earlier in the week and I declined. That just wouldn't be my idea of fun -- all that travel only to see Auburn get beat.

Do you know what this means? I will be living on easy street as Charlie will be taking care of me for the duration of the weekend.

Charlie called me a moment ago after dad had left to find out what I wanted for supper tomorrow night. He knows that I love Arby's and laughed when I told him I wanted several roast beef sandwiches and some of those spicy, crispy, onion-infused curly fries.

Living Life in the Danger Zone...

I've had such a wonderful day mental illness wise. My mind was clear and my senses were sharp and acute. My injection was really doing its job after a short nap this afternoon. This a dangerous time in the lives of many schizophrenics as they think they are cured and no longer need to take medications. I am labeled as "notoriously noncompliant" with regards to that by my doctor.

This Day Just Gets Better and Better...

"Matt got your computer parts ordered," my father told me as we completed the medication ritual. "You have such rich tastes in computer parts. The total was $290 dollars."

I Felt Like Tiny Tim Forgotten and Abandoned...

Well, my doctor's appointment went swell (sarcasm). I didn't say one word other than the initial pleasantries as I walked into my doctor's office. Dad and I took our respective seats and soon the shenanigans began. Dad and my doctor got embroiled in a rolling and convoluted conversation about painkillers in the psychiatric and pharmaceutical world. They were talking shop as some would say.

"Don't look so slumped over and nervous like that," dad told me at one point trying to bolster me and my spirits. "You look pitiful!"

"I am nervous and I am having a lot of anxiety!" I protested as my doctor and my father continued their rolling conversation on painkillers.

I then very timidly and rudely said, interrupting the conversation, "I want to leave and go get Maggie's and my steak biscuits as our reward."

That was my father's cue to shake my psychiatrist's hand and tell him goodbye. I don't have to come back for another six months.

"I'm sorry," my father said on the drive home as we ate our biscuits. "I didn't realize how uncomfortable you were."

"I thought I was going to jump out of my skin for a moment there," I replied.

I Don't Wanna Wait!

Unfortunately, this morning is my visit with my psychiatrist which always equals a long, anxious and crazed wait in the lobby. It can seem like an eternity as patient after patient is called back and not us. My anxiety grows and grows as well to the point my hands soon shake. Dad and I will anxiously look at our watches as time passes. Dad and I both agreed to get the earliest possible appointment this time which is ten our time and nine Auburn time so hopefully, that will help.

One great caveat of this little venture is the two steak biscuits I get at Hardee's afterward. Those things are heaven on earth. Dad always gets a sausage biscuit and a Senior coffee.

"Now, don't say anything is wrong and you won't have to come back in six months," my father coached me over the phone this morning.

We were both trying to wake up, shower, and get dressed.

"What if something was wrong and I need help?" I argumentatively asked my father.

I had wanted to talk about how I cycle from day to night as far as my sleeping habits go.

"Then we will have to come back in two weeks after a medication adjustment or addition," my father replied sounding exasperated. "You don't want to have to come back in two weeks, do you?"

Errands of Mighty Mercy...

"I am at the car-wash in Valley," my father told me yesterday waking me up from a very deep slumber. "I am going to swing by your house and give you your medications on my way home."

I looked at the clock and it read 5 O'Clock. It was a little early for medications, but I felt I needed them none-the-less.

"I'll see you in a few minutes," my father said and we got off the phone abruptly.

"What are you doing sleeping in the day?" my father worriedly asked as we sat on my couch after he had arrived at my house.

The X5 was all bright and shiny for a trip I would soon learn.

I was still in my pajamas and all-the-while Maggie was ardently vying for my father's attention.

"I've already told you that I am cycling mentally and I get my days and nights mixed up," I replied exasperated for the umpteenth millionth time.

"Well, I just worry about you," my father told me.

I don't know what's going on chemically or neuron wise in my brain, but I got an extra helluva kick in the deriere from my medications yesterday. It was quite a very pleasant and intoxicating feeling -- my head all giddy with glee.

Dad also told me he is leaving Friday to spend a week at the beach with his cousins.

"Your uncle Charlie will take good care of you while I am gone," he told me. "I am giving him a hundred dollars and he will bring you a fast food meal and a drink every night."

Dagnabbit! I Am Crestfallen...

No pot roast or mac and cheese tonight, but I did get three beautiful and superb tomatoes that will make for some fine and tasty tomato sandwiches. My father also brought me a razor sharp knife that is just on loan he said. I have to have permission to play in his sandbox.

"I never could get the gumption up to start supper," Dad told me sheepishly and apologizing.

"I'm hungry. Let's go get something to eat," I told my father.

"What do you want to eat?" Dad asked me as we walked to his car.

"I want a sackful of cheese Krystal's," I replied.

We headed down to fast food row by the interstate and I got my little minute cheeseburgers.

"Can you really eat twelve of those little burgers?"

"I will eat six now and six later as the evening progresses," I told him. "Maggie might get one or two if I can scrape all the onions off."

Trust: It's a Beautiful Thing...

Trust Begats Trust!

Charlie showed up mere moments ago with a jumbo fish platter from Captain D's. He thought I would like something different for a change.

"Do you mind eating Captain D's tonight?" Charlie asked me over his cellphone.

"Sounds great to me," I replied to Charlie. "You know I love the jumbo fish platter."

Four big filets of  fried Alaskan Pollock...

Maggie let me know when Charlie arrived. I walked out to his car to help him bring everything inside.

"Your father doesn't want you taking your meds too early so I will put them on top of your entertainment center," Charlie said. "That way you can take them at nine or whenever you need them.

My father would be absolutely aghast at what Charlie did today. He trusted me with my medications and it made me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside. I felt as if I had finally and truly arrived on the scene.

I counted the pills a moment ago and I take 11 different forms of medications every night -- quite a cocktail of crazy meds..