I am so tired of not being able to sleep. The conundrum lies with that atypical antipsychotic medications usually cause extreme drowsiness around the clock. One time my ex-wife thought I was full of shit and that I used that as an excuse to sleep all the time when I was taking Zyprexa (which is incredibly sedating). I talked her into taking just one small dosage pill and she slept for the rest of the day on into the night and never once gave me a hard time again about sleeping a lot.
Risperdal seems to have the opposite affect with me. I used to could sleep until lunch time everyday when I was a teenager and in college. Now I am lucky to sleep past four AM. I also grew accustomed to Carolyn’s nocturnal habits seeing she worked the night shift. She is back to working days and I am still stuck in night shift mode.
These early morning hours can be so terribly boring with little to do but read and smoke. I have been trying to play computer games, but they just don’t keep my interest for very long. I grow bored with them quickly and they seem like work. I guess I am finally growing up as far as they are concerned.
I have a cousin that I don't know well at all and some of her friends coming to stay with me this weekend in the bedrooms upstairs. I haven’t seen her in years and am nervous about the whole social aspect of her visit. Will I have to entertain? Will I have to cook and get up meals?
My father and Charlie stayed over until midnight last night changing sheets, vacuuming, and cleaning the bathrooms and kitchen in preparation for their visit. I rarely even go up there so never use that part of the house. God, I really do dread this. I wanted a nice and quiet weekend at home after last weekend’s whirlwind drive and vacation to Florida. My life is never simple it seems.
8 comments:
Sounds like a camping trip is in order. But if not, have Carolyn help out with your guests. They should be gone during the day, I am sure. She could help out with the social aspect of the visit. Wish I could be there to help you out myself. I know it's hard for you, Andrew. Just take your time with it.
What you need is a slumber party. Can we all come over? At least this way you half-way know some of us. We wouldn't be disrespectful. Of course, some of the girls may sift through your underwear drawer. :)
Jonathan,
On the other hand, think of the entertainment value of having a house full of women!
I'll bet they already have meals and itinerary planned and if they are at all polite will invite YOU for dinner (that they've prepared.) Don't feel obligated to join them, though. Just be clear about what you can and cannot do for them while they are visiting.
Be gentle with yourself!
I was thinking like Abbagirl, that a camping trip would sound lovely for you... after the family visit, that is.
On a different aspect. While not sleeping, did you try night walks in the neighborhood. I did it myself these past months I always found these country night walks very soothing. Now my life is back to normal, so to speak, but I keep going out at night when i can and enjoy a one to two hour walk under the stars... the pipe's here too, and the feeling is great, as i'm sure you know!
best to you two and family,
Laurent
Jonathan,I guess I am to new of a reader to understand why you are always expected to open up your home to anyone who has a whim to use it. Can you explain this to me.
Not being able to sleep, or stay asleep is the worst. You feel so lonely. What made it worse for me when I was going thru my bad insomnia was that my ex had no empathy. Can your meds be tweaked to improve your sleeping?
Why are you having the company? They probably won't expect to be treated as guests. I hope it goes better than you expect, that you'll be entertained, and we'll get some good stories.
Scooby,
This was my grandmother's house and my father inherited it. Charlie recently bought it thus allowing my father to pay off my mortgage with some of the proceeds. I know it must seem odd all the comings and goings.
I guess my family feels I should just be lucky to have a place to live and they certainly do not hold me in very high esteem. They rarely think about what I want or need to stay healthy. My therapist called them extremely superficial. I will be extremely glad when I move in my new house around the New Year and have some privacy and sense of solitude again. It has been years since I felt that way.
I think I'm feeling like Abbagirl this afternoon. Best way might be to make yourself scarce. It's just so cold here that "camping" isn't the first option that comes to mind. Could you visit with Carolyn or reschedule the Savanna trip? Last minute...maybe not.
Good luck this weekend. Do what you need to stay healthy!
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