I have a very large possibly hundred year old pecan tree in my backyard. It is a joy to sit at the window and watch the squirrels quarrel and chase each other over the morsels that are pecans. We had a bumper crop this fall. The pecan tree becomes the central nexus of the local squirrel community this time of year. It is a fitting bounty before the lean months of winter draw in around us.
I just saw my father’s maid and cook out in their backyard looking for pecans as well. She just recently had gastric bypass surgery and has lost 300 pounds. Can you imagine weighing 500 lbs and then losing 300? Dad told me this morning on the phone that she is going to be gone for a few weeks. Her arms and legs have become extremely flabby from the loss of weight and they are going to have to surgically tighten up her skin. Her sister, Juanita, is going to fill in while she is gone.
The phone has been ringing off the hook this morning. I think I am sending out drunken vibes to my family members. They know something is amiss. Everybody is calling me to see how I am and to just check in.
“What do you want Juanita to cook on Friday?” Mom asked.
“Can she cook fried salmon?” I asked.
“Hold on a second,” Mom said as she asked Helen if her sister could cook good fried Salmon.
“Helen says she cooks some of the best fried salmon croquettes you will ever eat,” Mom said as she returned to the phone.
Mom has gotten where she calls me to get up the weekly menu as we eat together every Friday evening.
“Let’s have fried salmon croquettes, macaroni and cheese, turnip greens, and corn bread,” I replied. “Oh, and have her make some pear salad with sharp cheddar.”
“That sounds good,” Mom said. “I will give Juanita some money so she can go shop and cook that.”
“Are you okay?” Mom then asked. “You sound funny.”
“I am fine mom. I will talk to you later,” I replied as I quickly got off the phone.
I know I sounded drunk as a cooter. I need to slow down. I have drunk 2/3rd’s of this bottle of Southern Comfort. Man, it feels awesome. I think I am going to become a career drunk and ruin my liver. It beats sitting around with nothing to do all day. Drunken bliss passes the time so quickly and I sleep well for a change.
10 comments:
Happy Monday Morning, enjoy the buzz. Sometimes a good unwind is just what the Dr. ordered.
Craig
Sir:
Please enjoy the good drunk. It is enjoyable to do on occasion. Then when you wake up from the drunken haze, simply brush yourself off, and go back to your normal day-to-day routine.
Please do not belittle or berate yourself. Just accept it as something you did on Monday and you enjoyed it while it was happening, and now on Monday evening or Tuesday morning.... I (meaning you) will get up and go about a normal routine again.
There is NOTHING wrong with your drinking if you enjoy it. So, do not let others berate you either.... including your father.
PipeTobacco
http://frumpyprofessor.blogspot.com
Just be careful not to hurt yourself hon. I think ruined livers are kind of ugly, they had one on Oprah the other day...We are having "fried salmon croquettes" on Friday too, but we call them "salmon patties" I like yours better.
Susan
Enjoy your buzz and get back to business tomorrow ;-)
No lectures. Ever. Promise. Just fork over the the recipes to the salmon croquettes and the pear salad.
Sweet dreams tonight.
Summer
Just take care of yourself. I'd like to have you around a while if you don't mind. Don't beat yourself up and take it easy. I honestly think a good buzz is nice to have once in a while. And I will never judge you for your actions. You are simply human. Accept that.
I'm happy to "see" you again Andrew!!! You can't change what's come to pass, just focus on what you want to do next.
I posted a comment on Sat Sept 30th, "Becky's Desktop". I forgot where I was and I don't know if bloggers check for new messages on old posts or not. Shouldn't we have a "comment alert system" on our Blogspot Dashboard?
I have no comment to this post.
Okay, now I want to comment. I disagree with all of you who say that Jonathon should enjoy this good buzz. The reason why I disagree is because it is not a good buzz. A good buzz comes when you drink on occasion. Jonathon drinks when he "self-medicating". It would be different if he drank on occasion and didn't do it because he facing some anxiety and stress.
So, Jonathon. I don't want you to enjoy this "good buzz" because we both know that is not what it is. We both know that you are going to feel guilty about it when it is over with. We both know that it doesn't help you whatsoever. We both know that you can't just casually drink a fifth by yourself. AND we both know that I care about you so much and I get scared when you get like this.
If you want to drink, then do it when it's not to make you feel better by "self-medicating". I know that Pipe will probably have something to say to this comment, but I do not think this is a time when you can simply "brush yourself off" afterwards and go on with your "day-to-day".
I agree that there is nothing wrong in drinking if it is something that you truly enjoy doing. By all means, I don't want you to stop doing it if it is something you actually enjoy doing.
I have read every archive and from what you have written over the last year, you don't usually enjoy it. It makes you feel guilty. You have stated that it helps mask what is going on personally.
Well, I have said what was on my mind. All of it is my "opinion" of course, as I also recognize that everyone else who has commented has given their "opinion" as well. I will now face the tongue-lashing. Bring it on, cuz' Jonathon is worth it. I care very much about him.
Hello Sir & Abbagirl:
Abbagirl, I must say that I agree with you 100%. I think that you have hit the nail on the head here.
My post was an attempt to have Jonathon view drinking in a different way... one that doesn't have to be associated with guilt.
It is my opinion that much of the time, Jonathon starts feeling guilty or worried that his father might disapprove of his actions (be it with Carolyn, or Paying Dan's bill, or hanging out with the "gang" at Kroger, or simply living his life in some way his father disagrees with). This guilt or worry then gnaws at him until he seeks the solace of a bottle. Then the issues is compounded because when Jonathon sobers up, he then has a return of the original guilt plus NEW guilt for drinking.
Unfortunately, this seems to be a viscious cycle of sorts.... because once enough guilt is resting on his shoulders, Jonathon then seems to feel forced to back down and accept the wrath of his father. Then he follows his fathers wishes for a while but this of course gnaws at him and he gets resentful and that leads to the start of a new cycle.
I am truly hopeful that Jonathon will have much better luck when he moves to his new home. The physical distance from his father will help him to not feel so pressured by him.
I think if Jonathon can get this continual pressure cooker sort of relationship with his father to stop, then Jonathon will simply drink to enjoy, and will likely do so only infrequently.
Jonathon is a very good, wise and thoughtful young man. I think he desserves to live life in his own way... and I think that it seems unlikely his father will ever "allow" that as long as he lives next door. Perhaps a mile or two of distance will make all the difference in the world.
PipeTobacco
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