Mark My Solemn Words…

For the first time ever in my life, I am foregoing and forestalling a new Microsoft Windows operating system.  I have always been a very, very early adopter as Microsoft worked out the kinks with each new OS, but have decided to opt out of this install.  Both of my computers are working fine so why change things? I am reading on WarCraft message boards of compatibility problems with high end graphics cards and their drivers with regards to updating to Windows 10.  I don’t want to stay up all night troubleshooting a graphics card and different drivers. Another niggling thing that bothers me is that I won’t have install discs.  Of course, I could torrent them, but that would be copyright infringement and I would then have to fiddle with and worry about activation cracks.     

Glass Half Empty–Glass Half Full…

I so wanted it to rain today and it is raining softly and comfortingly tonight. Drops of rain can be heard gently dropping off the eaves of my house.  I also wanted to see the blue moon tonight as well.  I will have to wait for that it seems.  Maybe if I stay up really late, the rain will stop, the clouds will clear, and I will get to see my full blue moon.

It is 10:35pm and I am still waiting on Papa and the medications.  He will not answer his phone so I feel sort of amiss and out of the loop.  Mom is not answering at home so something is certainly amiss.  This is when it sucks when some other person has control over some aspect of your life.  What would my father do if just decided I needed to take a car ride about the time he normally brings my medications?  He would be livid of course. “You know you take your medications at 9 to 9:30pm!”

Update – my father jovially arrived at 11:20pm tonight in good spirits with my medications. I squashed and quelled any ill feelings I had towards him just to see him and to know he was okay.  I really do worry about my father getting DUIs.  He is so aloof about it all and doesn't realize how serious it all is. You can get a DUI by just drinking one large glass of wine.

“I had to help Charlie clean up,” my father said in excuse of his late arrival. “Charlie had 56 party goers in all.”

Charlie had fixed me a big plate of food which my father had brought to me.  There were spicy and sweet baked beans, tangy German potato salad ala my father, crispy and crunchy tator tots, and three smoky grilled hamburgers.  On a separate plate, was a slice of Charlie’s signature chocolate pie.

Photo Credit:   http://kemidele.com/2015/02/11/feb-11-happy-dont-cry-over-spilled-milk-day/

Edie Brickell - Once In A Blue Moon

In honor of our blue moon tonight… I just adore this song.

Helen’s Soul Food Fridays…

Helen cooked beef patties and gravy today which I love to eat with A1 sauce.  She also made a big batch of her now famous deviled eggs.  I can eat a half dozen of those things even though I got only three on my plate today.  She also cooked steamed cabbage which is great with a little Southern style sport pepper hot sauce sprinkled on top.  I got my cornbread when it was still piping hot and slathered it with butter.  Woo wee Aunt Bea.  Can you say cholesterol? I can!

Tonight is Horsefly’s 44th birthday party.  The doctors all said he would never live past 25.   Charlie has invited over 60 people for this “little” bash.  Sadly, I will not be attending – my social anxieties getting in the way.  Three’s a crowd in my playbook.  Charlie called me and said he would make sure I got some burgers out of the deal.  He is diligently cooking burgers on his grills at the moment.  “Wish you would come!” Charlie said to me as I politely declined and hung up the phone.

Photo Credit:   http://www.southyourmouth.com/2012/09/hamburger-steaks-with-brown-gravy.html

Comment Reply to Sir Pipe Tobacco…

Sir:
I am in a questioning mood today, so:
1. Why on Earth would your father be disgruntled if you wished to cook for yourself for a week instead of eating frozen food?!?
2. Did you try out Windows 10? If so, what did you think? I have 7 myself. Why did Microsoft think it was not ok to call it Windows 9?
3. How are things going with that Laura? I do find what you mentioned about her discussions on FaceBook to be worrisome.... so please be careful. While oral gratification can be quite enjoyable for both partners, it seems to write an graphic instruction manual on how a woman may conduct this sort of behavior upon a male and then publish it on FaceBook would be a bit uncouth.
4. Are you still refraining from tobacco in all forms?
5. I do not know if you ever mentioned... do you read much in the form of books? If so, what sorts of fiction do you prefer? Science fiction, or police novels, or detective novels or what?
Your friend,
PipeTobacco

Andrew Replies…

1. Pipe, he feels I will not clean up my kitchen after my cooking and other assorted arcane asinine problems.  Sometimes, I think my father is just a tad mentally ill himself.  My mother and I have driven him to it sadly it seems.

2. I have not tried Windows 10 (still waiting on it to download and install on my Windows 8.1 Pro machine which I use for mainly browsing the internet) I have reserved my copy via email.  I assume Windows 9 was still far too tablet orientated and they skipped it after their experiences with Windows 8 and 8.1 and all the confusion those two operating systems caused.  I am not installing it on my Windows 7 gaming machine.  Because I know if I do, I will start having compatibility problems with my games.

3. Laura and I are set to go eat Mexican at El Rio Grande here in the Valley today at 5PM.  I am picking her up at her parent’s home in Lagrange and we will be driving to the restaurant. I told her I would take her where she wants to go and she wanted Mexican food.   Strangely, I am not nervous.  I was a nervous wreck the first date and dad said it was a marvel I went through with it with all my social anxieties.  My therapist was flabbergasted that I went that first time as well.

4. Pipe, don’t tell my family, hehe, but I still occasionally quite enjoy a Swisher Sweet cigar. I love the way those cigars taste and smell.

5. Pipe, I haven’t been reading any books lately unfortunately.  

Just a Friendly Ride Down the Interstate…

Mom and I embark on a little trip to Books-a-Million down on the plains of Auburn this morning.  I am way ahead of the game having gotten up at 6am. She is supposed to call me at 9am to make sure I am up. We leave at 10am eastern time.

I slow simmered my spaghetti meat sauce all night and I was hoping it turned out well and it did this morning. The whole house smelled so wholesome of spaghetti sauce.   All it needs is a little salt, a liberal sprinkle of parmesan cheese, and it is done. I’ve boiled the noodles and mixed them in which will further thicken the sauce until lunch rolls around.

On an interesting note, we had a whopper of a  violent electrical storm roll through just at dusk last night and we didn’t get power back on until hours later after midnight. I opened up the screened in porch and some windows in the back of the house, which Maggie loved, to get a cool breeze blowing through the house.   I also had to unload all my groceries in the dark as well which proved interesting with my gimped and broken foot. I was watching the end of a movie, Interstellar, on my iPad when the power thankfully clicked back on and all my gadgets, lights, and doodads came back on and whirred to life.

As I had surmised on the shopping front, dad had a hissy fit that I was cooking all week.  I got a ton of food for my money, though, and he had to agree.

A Friendly Reminder from Your Computer and Gadget Loving Andrew…

I do think you will be able to opt out of this upgrade. I am going to install it to my Windows 8.1 Pro machine as it can’t be any worse.  ~Andrew

"In less than 24 hours, Microsoft will start upgrading Windows 7 and Windows 8 machines to Windows 10. The software giant is preparing for this big release, at 12AM ET on July 29th (9PM PST on July 28th), by pre-loading the final version of Windows 10 on PCs eligible for the upgrade. A number of Windows 7 and Windows 8 users who have registered for the upgrade have started noticing that the full installer files for Windows 10 have been downloaded to C:\$windows.~BT as Microsoft gets ready for release."

Comment Reply…

glittermom said...

Why doesn't your dad retire already...I'm assuming he really doesn't have to work...what's going on with his other house?

Dear Glittermom,

I can only assume dad keeps working because he likes the extra income.  I have no idea what is going on over at the river house these days.  I don’t take an active interest in it.

No Grocery Shopping for You!

By the time dad arrived last night, I just didn’t feel like going through that whole rigmarole of grocery shopping.  I think he was glad as well as he had a hellacious day at the pharmacy.  He slumped down in my couch and didn’t want to move. He works one more day tomorrow and then he is off for awhile.  Hopefully, he will get back to his Tuesday and Thursday schedule.

Mom just stopped by with bologna sandwiches worried I was starving.  She also had two of the largest containers of Gain and Tide with bleach I had ever seen.  Charlie had obviously been to Sam’s Club.  Mom kept asking me if I was mad at her.

“Why would I be mad at you?” I asked her.

“I don’t know,” she said. “I guess cause I am being a busybody.”

I chuckled and gave her a hug.

“Busybodies get things done,” I told her.

Not Much to Say Tonight Belying My Usual Verbose Self…

Laura and I chatted online throughout the day and that may be why I am not very verbose tonight. She is still feeling really mentally ill and I am hapless as what to do.  I finally got off the computer and started cleaning house.  I got the kitchen clean and then I cleaned the den.  I need to sweep the den and then I will be through with that room.  My bedroom is my next task to accomplish tomorrow.   Then I will clean the bathroom and can say finis.

I go to the grocery store tonight and I am cooking this week despite dad’s predicted protests. He will just have to bitch and moan. Those Marie Calendar’s meals left me hungry towards the end of last week.  Thankfully, Mom brought her and I Arby’s tonight.   My recipe for spaghetti and meat sauce will feed me for three days.  $60 dollars of spaghetti fixings will feed me for six days.  So that’s the plan.

Laura laughed at me when I just texted her that I was feeling a little wild eyed and bushy tailed myself – that mental illness is contagious.

I am listening to the Thievery Corporation’s greatest hits for the first time and it is interesting.  It was recommended by a friend who has similar tastes in music as mine.  They have lots of Middle Eastern and Reggae influences in their sound.

The Two Live Crew…

Well, Papa and Charlie, the two live crew, are out wrangling us up some supper.  I decided on chicken fingers.  I was talking to Dad on the phone as they drove through the drive-thru.

“Goddammit John, we’ve got to get Andrew the chicken strips!” Charlie exclaimed to my father as dad laughed.

“You’re getting the chicken meal from hell,” my father told me laughing again over the matter.

Late Sunday Evening as Life Marches Ever Forward…

I have had the hardest time staying awake lately.  It seems all I want to do is sleep.  Laura suggested today that the depression side of my illness is coming out and making itself known.  I don’t feel depressed, but just sleepy all the time.  She doesn’t feel well today also – saying she feels nervous and jittery.  She’s got me a dozen questions to ask my father ,the pharmacist, tonight.

It is time for Sunday night fried chicken.  I think I am going with the chicken tenders this week.  The closer to seven I get, the more excited I will get.  I’m ready for some hardcore schizophrenia meds as we speak. Maybe they will make me feel better as they usually do.   All the Klonopin I take at night tends to settle my nerves and settles me down as well.

Laura and I had a long talk on the phone last night.  I told her some of my misgivings about her and she said I was taking things out of context.   We decided to both keep giving it a shot and go out next week.  There is another suitor in the midst and he is actively pursuing her as well.   She says he gets on her nerves which makes me chuckle.  He certainly is a determined and needy fellow on Facebook.  I’m the laid back one of the bunch.  You certainly won’t catch me groveling like Richard does.   Richard is probably one of the neediest fellows that I’ve come across in years.

Maggie Tickles Me Sometimes…

Maggie was putting up a fuss about something this morning – making a lot of noise directed at me.  It turned out that the grass was very wet with dew, she had to go to the bathroom something fierce, and didn’t want to get her feet wet.  I am not joking.  That crazy dog.  The urge to go potty finally grew too strong and out the dog door she went. Now? She is on the den floor licking her wet paws.

SeX talK…

Christina Said…

I disagree, respectfully. As a fellow human of the world, you owe her truth. I simple "We're not a fit" is the truth. No need to lie, and no need to explain every last detail of why you're not a fit for each other. Think about if you were on the receiving end of a rejection. Would you want to think that person is making up a story. The story is to save you the discomfort of rejecting her. Not her.
On a personal note: I agree that someone who posts something as crude as how to give a proper BJ on social media is not someone I'd want to date. (Just cus it shows some immaturity). But be honest....do you really think oral sex is demeaning? Why? We're adults here, let's discuss....

I guess I am a babe in the woods are far as sex is concerned.  Now, mind you, I enjoy pleasuring a woman with cunnilingus, but I don’t like blow jobs for all those times down at the Piggly Wiggly when all the crack whores were giving blowjobs behind the store to get up money to buy crack cocaine.  I associated blowjobs as being a demeaning act for crack whores and drug lords. 

World of WarCraft…

My dwarf hunter made it to level 20 this morning.  I expected there to be fanfare! LOL  The game is getting increasingly harder as time passes and I level up.  I have yet to tap into the social part of the game just yet, though.  It seems as if there is everyman for himself – everyman trying to level up as fast as they can while I am just enjoying a slow ride to ascension.   

Calling it Quits…

What would be a polite and gentlemanly way to tell a woman you don’t want to date her anymore?  I thought I would tell her I have too much going on in my private life to date someone right now.   I have decided I am cutting ties with Laura.  Too many strange things are going on that are making my spidey dating sense tingle and go off.  She posted today on Facebook thinking I wouldn’t see it with her multiple Facebook accounts about the proper way to  suck D—k.  That was the end for me.  I want to date a woman with more class than that. I think that it is demeaning for a woman to do that anyway.

Sirius The Dog Star…

Known for its appearance above the horizon in and during the hellish hot dog days of a late Southern summer.  I feel like I’ve had a few dog days myself lately – the heat bearing down upon me. 

I talked to my therapist today and she is elated at all that is going on. 

“There’s hope for you yet,” she very playfully said as I exited her office and set up a new appointment. “You’ve gone from barely able to get out of the house to dating.  I’d say that is a major, major accomplishment.”

photo Credit:  http://realitysandwich.com/217881/sirius-ufo-trickster-extraordinaire/

A Bee is in your Bonnet!

I have a busy day tomorrow. I will be busy as a bee! I have a doctor’s appointment with the orthopedic surgeon at 9am.   I then take mom to the bookstore in Auburn afterwards.  She has even more books on the way other than the ones we pick up in the morning.  As usual,  I am content to get a $40 computer mouse or a Sonic chocolate shake out of the deal. This time I think I will get a wired ergonomic keyboard.

I am also hoping the doctor will let me take off this leg brace which is the most unwieldy contraption ever conceived or invented.

Photo Credit:    http://www.silhouettedesignstore.com/?page=view-shape&id=12032

Cancelled Date…

I cancelled Laura’s and my date tonight.  My spidey sense is going off something fierce and I am getting weird vibes that this woman may not be who she portrays herself as being. She closed down her Facebook page and started another with a different last name the other day and invited me in as a friend.  It just seems really fishy to me.  She said Facebook took her page down because she posted something about the confederate flag.  I don’t buy that excuse for any reason. The ACLU and their attack lawyers would be all over Facebook like stink on shit if they were banning such posts. 

Emergency Morning Automobile Operations…

“Charlie said to be sure and bring you,” my father said over the phone very early this morning.  “He’s had a bad flat tire on his way to work over by Jack’s in Lafayette.”

I rubbed my eyes as my body caught up with my mind.  My hamster reluctantly squeaked as it got in its wheel that squeaked reluctantly as well.

“I’ll pick you up in ten minutes,” my father then told me.

I got out of the bed and hurriedly dressed in some old yard work clothes. Changing tires is very dirty work.

It is about a 30 minute drive to our county seat, Lafayette.  I sat in the passenger's seat of the X5 dazed and seemingly confused as we sped up Highway 50.  We pulled up next to Charlie as he was drinking coffee and eating a breakfast biscuit.  NPR was playing on the radio. He seemed to be having a grand time.

“Took you two long enough!” he said with a smile and a laugh.

It took me about 15 minutes to change the tire and Charlie was on his way.  The cause of the flat was a mangled stainless steel fork stuck in the tire’s sidewall.  I told Charlie that the tire was not salvageable much to his dismay.

“How in the holy hell do you get a fork stuck in your tire?” dad asked me as we headed back home.

I just shrugged, shook my head in wonderment, and laughed. 

Photo Credit:  http://www.ipaintiwrite.com/2013/06/04/when-life-gives-you-a-flat-tire-make-a-tire-swing/

To Answer Christina’s Question…

No, we are really not in a relationship just yet.  We are in the getting to know each other phase.  We haven’t even kissed yet.  I gave her a big hug on our last date and that was the extent of our intimacy.

Biochemical Oscillations…

Or circadian rhythms gone wild!

Oh, I am doing it again.  I stay up later every night ad sleep later every day.  My daily naps have also grown longer.  The quiet wee hours of the morning are so comforting to me and they lure me into their trap. I am going to forego my nap tomorrow and see if I get in the bed at a decent time. 

Sunday Night Fried Chicken…

It’s that time of the week again: Sunday night fried chicken.  Dad just just called me and asked me what I wanted.

“Just get me whatever is easiest on you and Charlie,” I told my father.

“Charlie and Papa are coming!” I then told Maggie who got in the den window to lookout for them.

I am not a picky or finicky eater.  Dad said I would probably be getting Popeye’s fried chicken and biscuits this week.  The only thing I don’t like about Popeye’s is their frying batter is too crunchy for my tastes.  It is hard for me to chew.

“We’ll take your medications and do Maggie’s ritual once Charlie and I get there,” my father told me.

“Sounds like a good plan!” I told my father.

I was exuberant they were running so early tonight. They may even get here before dark fall.   It doesn’t take much to get me excited these days.

Dating is Exhausting…

I am an total introvert in a relationship with an extremely outgoing extrovert.  Laura can talk on the phone for hours and multiple times a day.  My therapist would call this good therapy bless her little misguided soul.  I can’t really complain much as I needed an extrovert to kind of bring me out of my shell so to speak. Laura is leading in this little dance we are undertaking called dating and getting to know each other.

She wants to see my house so I better get to cleaning.  Her parent’s house is immaculate and in a very posh subdivision.  Ms. Maggie would like to find out the progenitor of all these strange smells on me lately as well.

Dad and my brother drove just over 5000 miles to reach Bama last week.  I am kind of glad I didn’t get recruited for that drive home.  They are still recovering and it has been over a week since they found their way home. 

Laura is a sweetheart and I do believe we have a future together.  She says she suffers from a mild form of Asperger’s syndrome which is mild form of autism. Her behavior would suggest otherwise.   I would diagnose her as being ADHD, but then again I am not a psychiatrist. She may just simply be an extrovert born into a busy world.

Photo Credit:   http://www.lifehacker.com.au/2013/07/how-introverts-and-extroverts-can-peacefully-coexist/

Mom’s in that Mood Again…

We are once again driving to Auburn often to pick up books from Books-A-Million.  Dad has appreciated me driving her as my mother on the roads of busy Auburn would be total mayhem and disaster.  Mom is also off her diet and it is contagious.  We’ve both been bad influences on each other and have been stopping at our favorite Sonic and getting chocolate shakes for our drive back up the interstate. 

We also stopped by Best Buy today (Andrew’s technological Mecca) and I bought a brand-new wireless mouse.  As I have said before on this blog, I collect computer mice and keyboards.  This mouse’s batteries are supposed to last two years so that is heartening to know. It feels tiny in my big old hand, though.

Photo Credit:  http://www.ebay.com/itm/New-Logitech-M510-Wireless-nano-USB-Full-Size-Laser-Mouse-Gray-Ships-Worldwide-/330800657465

Unfounded Fears…

My and Laura’s date went swimmingly well last night despite my worst fears.  Her pictures on the internet made her look frumpy and overweight, not very attractive at all, but she was cute as a button in person and very slim. Tiny.  She is 5 foot 4 and I am 6 foot 3. We ate supper at China Express in Lagrange and then drove to Wendy’s and got a frosty for dessert.  I was just exhausted and a bundle of nerves when I got home last night, though.  The whole family wanted to know how our date went.  The phone was ringing off the hook.

This morning, I drive mom to the bookstore in Auburn.  I am hoping I can get a new mouse  and a chocolate shake out of the deal. Mom wants a  Butterfinger blast.  I also want to do some serious window shopping at Best Buy. That place is like a playground for me.

Hot as a Tin Roof Under a Southern Sun…

It is hot as the Devil’s hells and Hades outside. Ever heard of frying an egg on pavement?  Today might be a good day to try.  My wireless weather station reads 97° degrees right now.  I worked on my car some this early morning and I am glad I did that at 8am and not 5pm this afternoon.

Laura’s and my date is officially set for Wednesday.  I am going to pick her up at 6pm in Lagrange, Georgia at her house and we are going out for Chinese.  She seems excited and I am as well.  Just like a woman, she couldn’t get me on the phone last night at 10:30pm and she immediately thought I was mad or angry with her.  I was actually out with Charlie looking at a new house he wants to buy.  Charlie wanted my opinion (money pit).

Mom arrived a few moments ago with supper as in Arby’s – both our favorite fast food place to eat.  I was on the phone with Laura and had to abruptly get off to answer the door.  I hope that wasn’t too irksome for her. 

Photo Credit:  http://www.fold-pak.com/MarketsServiced/ChineseandPanAsian.htm

Hide and Seek…

I’ve been playing hide and seek from the phone all afternoon.  For a person with social anxiety and phone phobias, I certainly get a lot of phone calls. It’s miraculous I even answer the phone.

I just got off the phone with my mother telling her it was imperative that she didn’t drive anywhere – that the weather is going to get bad.  Charlie was also just here with my medications. I told him the same thing.

“Is is really going to start raining in 30 minutes?” he asked me looking incredulous.

I told him to hurry up and hurry home. It was going to get stormy.

I think Laura just tried to call me, but I am gun-shy tonight – pleasantly ensconced in my medication ritual.  One more hour and I will be floating on cloud 9.

My sister brought me six nice, new shirts from Dillard’s for my “date”.  I was elated.  Time is starting to heal those old terrible wounds I inflicted upon my family years ago. Maggie also enjoyed the kids being over.  Maggie was so patient with them considering she’s only been around kids a handful of times in her life.

Photo Credit: http://adventureswithgastroparesis.com/2013/04/22/gastroparesis-on-cloud-nine/

St. Louis Bound…

I just talked to my father.  They were a hundred miles outside of St. Louis where they will be visiting a cousin of mine (Clifford the Third or C3 as we affectionately call him) once they arrive in town.

Mom and I both agree it will be good to get them home.  I think the travelers are getting weary of the road as well.  Dad sounded very haggard over the phone as if his patience had run out.

“It feels like they have been gone a month,” my mother told me on the phone a moment ago.

I agreed with mom.  It does seem like forever.  

My sister is bringing her kids to see me this afternoon.  So I have been scrambling to get the house presentable and clean – sweeping floors and such.  My sister keeps her house in immaculate condition on top of her busy schedule as a doctor.

Photo Credit: http://www.capintlcomm.com/

Treating Her Like a Lady…

Mom brought me Helen’s delicious dinner tonight.  I grow weary of telling you what we ate in that my father gets Helen to fix the same things over and over ad nauseum.  If it were up to me, I would let Helen get adventurous with her cooking and we could all see what she puts together.  There is more to Southern cookin’ than just peas and cornbread.  We had cube steak and gravy tonight with the aforementioned peas and cornbread.  I like to mash up my soupy peas and cornbread.  It is almost like a hearty poor man’s soup.

My preparations for my date are coming together.  I just drove to AutoZone to get polish and shine for the interior and dash of my car – the exterior now clean.  Mom was with me and sat out in the car. I got a really nice, new shirt at Old Navy today and mom and I got me a better pair of new tennis shoes. I am hoping my comfortable pair of blue jeans still fit me without having to buy another pair.

Mom and I were down in Auburn this morning picking up her more books.  We stopped by Sonic on our way home and got a small chocolate shake shared between us.

Laura and I are talking on the phone now often for up to an hour or two at the time which leaves me exhausted.  I don’t know how to get off the phone nicely.  Tonight, I just had to tell her Charlie was here.  The phone never was my forte, but Laura keeps the conversation moving thankfully – no awkward or odd silences which drive me batty.  My hands were shaking the first time she told me she was going to call me as I waited by the phone after sending the number via Facebook’s Messenger.  I know I had to sound so nervous, but her sultry voice put me at ease.  She kind of purrs like a kitten.    

Ok, Charlie will soon arrive with my medications. It is 10pm and  I am ready to take them, and then I will head to bed shortly once they kick in.  It has been a long, busy day.  Lately, he has been bringing me a giant Coke every night and it has been such a treat before bed even if I do have to get up and pee around midnight. lol

My Family's Last Day at Yellowstone…

We survived camping in Yellowstone for three nights. I am more than ready for a warm, comfy bed and a hot shower. We had a great time in Yellowstone. Driving 15 hours over the next two days.

Her Name is Laura…

I was talking to Laura last night – my new relationship interest.  I told her I was going to get up the courage to ask her out for a dinner date once my foot is better and when I get up the courage to actually ask.  She told me just to let her know and that she is excited about it.  I am going to get some flowers to give her on our first date as well.  I also wrote to her last night to tell me her favorite restaurant in Lagrange.  I expect her to get online this morning and tell me that.  Mom and I are going tomorrow to get me some new tennis shoes and a nice shirt for me to wear.  The pieces of the puzzle are falling into place.  My chariot of love is cleaner than it has been in years thanks to Charlie’s help with a good wax job and a thorough vacuuming.

I also take mom to Books-a-Million in Auburn tomorrow.  She has called me ten times fretting I may not be able to take her.  I told her to quit worrying so much – I can still get around pretty good.  I am just going to sit in the car while she does her business.  We will go to Best Buy if I feel up to it tomorrow.  I am dying for a new corded computer mouse.

What My Father is Doing in Yellowstone, Montana at the Moment…

In Capable Hands…

Blessings be to my mother and Charlie.  I am in capable hands with regards to those two. Charlie left my sodas and breakfast on the front porch this morning, and my mother brought pizza tonight.  I am so smitten right now with Johnny’s New York style pizza at the moment.  Mom purchased a large pizza with Italian sausage and pepperoni.  I ate the whole pizza in one sitting as Maggie stared at me hoping for a morsel.  I’ve also gained five pounds this week, but I’ll get back on my diet soon.

The dull throbbing I was feeling in my foot is gone.  As long as I have this cumbersome brace on, I feel no pain at all except just a little soreness when I sit still for a long time. 

We also had an embarrassing SNAFU yesterday at the pharmacy.  Dad’s co-pharmacist (now the new owner) wouldn’t fill my prescription for Oxycontin because I had a past history of substance abuse.  She said she was checking for drug interactions in the back room, while she was really calling my father on his iPhone. She blatantly lied to my mother and I.  I left the pharmacy feeling defeated more than anything.  It actually embarrassed me as well.   It was just another instance of the “feel good police” of my life in action.

Katydids and Sweet Iced Tea…

Nights like tonight remind me of the summers spent on my grandmother’s farm.  We would sit out on the front porch drinking sweet iced tea as the katydids sang their mating songs. One of us would start to yawn contagiously and then we all soon went inside to head for bed.  My grandmother would turn on the air conditioning in my front bedroom and I thought is was the most wondrous thing ever invented.  I would always turn the vents directed down on me and cover up good from the chill.  The drone of the window air conditioning unit would lull me to sleep eventually and I would wake up in what seemed like mere moments to the smell of fresh brewed coffee and that of frying bacon or sausage.

And the Verdict is?

Broken foot.  Now, I have this big monstrosity of a brace on my leg and foot which I have to wear for three weeks.  Luckily, I can take it off before going to bed.  I look and sound like Frankenstein’s monster milling about this house, and the Magster doesn’t quite know what to do with me at the moment.  She’s scared of me and fascinated at the same time when I come clunking down the hall.  To make the picture complete all I would have to do is moan and lurch like a brain eating zombie.

The Day of the Doctor…

Can you feel the tension in the air?  It’s palpable for me.  Andrew is going to the doctor today when Andrew really doesn’t like going to doctors period. They always find other things wrong with me rather than the real reason I went. 

“Oh, we are going to have to amputate your foot,” is what I expect to hear. “That, or at least take a few toes for good measure.”

I do hope Dr. Martin doesn’t mention that dirty word called surgery.

My foot is feeling much better this morning.  I can now walk on it without shards of pain seemingly ripping through it. It is now just sore.  Mom just called and told me she would pick me up at 3:30pm for a 4pm appointment.  My mother lives and thrives for this type of stuff – old fuss and feathers that she is. She gets all giddy when she calls to make appointments in true secretarial fashion.

Charlie left me a care package outside the front door this morning.  Maggie’s squealing woke me up. He brought Maggie and I sausage biscuits from McDonald’s.  There was also one of those gigantic Cokes he loves to get me.

Photo Credit:  https://spiritualmusclehead.wordpress.com/2013/04/29/hes-dead-jim/

Don’t You Just Love it When UPS Pulls Up in Front of Your House?

UPS – the new Santa Claus…

I’ve been eagerly awaiting some computer parts these past few days.  I bought a new bracket for the power supply in my blogging computer.  It is now securely fastened to the frame of my computer case. It was just sitting on the floor of the enclosure and it was bugging the hell out of me. Mainly because it was such an expensive power supply that needed to be secured.   I also bought a really nice, new heat sink and fan for the processor in my blogging computer as well.  My processor temperatures dropped almost 20 degrees Celsius at idle. I was just using the stock Intel heat sink and fan, and as usual they suck.  This allowed me to overclock my processor to 4.8 GHz and it is completely stable.  I also got two DVI to HDMI cables which I needed the most. 

Photo Credit:   https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_Parcel_Service

Of Sodas and Tales of Woebegone…

Mom called me very bright and early this morning.  She apologized for waking me up, but I’ve been awake since 6am. I got out of the bed that early much to Maggie’s dismay. Maggie immediately got in the warm spot I left in the bed.

“I’ve got you a doctor’s appointment at 4pm tomorrow to go see Dr. Martin,” she told me.

I kidded my mother about her crush and infatuation with regards to that doctor..

“I can still window-shop,” she replied defensively.

“Mom?” I asked with deep furrows in my brow. “What are we going to do about grocery day?”

“You can get one of those motorized carts and I will help get your groceries in the basket.”

Well, that certainly put a dent in my pride and manhood.

Charlie brought my sodas this morning on his way to work.  Charlie and Mom have really rallied the troops around me.  I am in able hands to be sure.

“How are you feeling today?” my mother then asked me.

“I can walk a little bit without my crutches this morning without excruciating pain,” I told her. “That’s got to be a good sign.”

She Got a Whiff Of Something Being Wrong…

Charlie told my mother about my foot much to my chagrin.  I was just talking on the phone with him. I was kind of miffed that Charlie did that. 

“You're momma knows best,” Charlie said adamantly. “She can get things done of this sort.”

“But Charlie, mom is going to call me ten times today obsessively and I can barely make it to the phone.”

Charlie couldn't help but chuckle at the obsessive phone calls.

Well, mom is going to get an appointment to see Dr. Martin.  I always got tickled at mom as she says Dr. Martin is “dreamy”.  This is why we call my mother the secretary as she’s a mover and a shaker.  My mother gets things done with a unrelenting and dogged determination.

Help! A Podiatrist Please?

Yesterday, I was exiting my parent’s house with my arms full of food containers. I had too much to carry. Sometimes, I can be a total dumbass as well. I should’ve made two trips. Well, I got halfway down the back deck steps and fell. Hard.  I twisted my foot something terribly and can barely walk on it.

“Do you want to go to urgent care?” Charlie asked me worriedly last night.

“Let’s wait a few days and see if it heals,” I replied.  “Charlie?  Don’t tell mom or she will obsess over this like crazy.”

At one point, the pain was incredibly painful and excruciating, but now feels mostly sore. I do hope my foot is not broken.  It is swollen to almost double the size as my right foot.

Charlie just has brought breakfast.  He also said he is going on a scavenger hunt today to find me some decent crutches.   Charlie is so kind.  He has now left to go get my sodas from mom knowing I can barely walk and that I can’t do it..

Photo credit:    http://www.emirates247.com/news/world/singer-walks-2-700km-on-broken-foot-2010-08-03-1.274312

Fire Up the Grill…

Dear Maggie…

The Tale of Two Dollar Stores…

I just drove over to Fred’s for some more Benadryl.  Things looked ominous as the parking lot was slam full of cars and lots of people were milling about.  I stepped inside and poor McGruff was the only cash register open and there were probably twenty people in line and that is a conservative estimate. The store was full of people.  One lady heckled McGruff from the back of the line.   “Can’t y’all open another register?  This is ridiculous!”  Tough McGruff looked flustered. 

They had changed the price of the cheapest 24 pack of Fred’s diphenhydramine HCL from $1.85 to $2.60.  I grumbled a little bit at the price and walked out of the store as I waved bye to McGruff.  She waved back and said, “Sorry honey!”  She knows exactly what I get every time I am in the store.

My next stop was Family Dollar which is just down the road.  Maybe a 1/2 mile from Fred’s.  The store was fairly empty and they had a 100 count diphenhydramine HCL for $2.99.  You can’t beat that price anywhere in town.  I felt like a traitor, though, defecting to the enemy. I didn’t even have to wait in line as a lady with a gigantic pack of toilet paper promptly finished her transaction as I stepped up to the register.

Photo Credit:  http://www.cleveland.com/lakewood/index.ssf/2012/02/plans_for_family_dollar_move_f.html

My Home is My Castle…

It happened again just a moment ago.  Some nefarious looking dude knocking on my door as Maggie went ape shit bananas.  I looked out the windows in the door and it was a middle aged black man with decent clothes and some gray in his hair – no doubt wanting to “borrow” some money.  He knocked five more times till my social anxieties were reeling.  He then left and knocked on Joyce’s door and stood there ten minutes waiting for someone to answer. I chuckled.  Unless Joyce has arisen from the grave, then no one was going to answer that door.  He then headed down to Mr. McClellan's house on the corner.  Mr. McClellan recently had a heart attack and probably doesn’t need all that going on.

Mom just called me and Helen is busy cooking a pot roast with potatoes, carrots, and onions.  Doesn’t that sound delicious?  We are also having steamed cabbage, cole slaw, and cornbread.  

“Let’s go get a candy bar after I get my hair fixed,” mom told me. “I will pick you up around 2ish.”

I already know what I want.  I want two king size Reese’s peanut butter cups and two king sized Hershey’s milk chocolate bars. Mom wants a king sized Milky Way bar.

Dearest Maggie…

Guten Morgen…

My ex-wife and I still fight fervently and viciously in my dreams.  We were having a knock down, drag out fight when Maggie abruptly woke me this morning whining or whinging as the British say. I guess it is my penance to pay for the downhill spiral that was our marriage.

“What’s wrong, girl?” I sleepily asked the Maggins who stood by the bed furiously wagging her tail.

She led me into the laundry room and I had forgotten to open her dog door this morning.  She got to barking around midnight last night and I got her in with the promise of bologna and quickly locked the door for my neighbor’s sake.  I didn’t fall asleep until almost 3am last night as Maggie “cough barked” by my side.  Maggie went tearing out that dog door when I opened it this morning.  I tell ya when ya gotta go ya gotta go.  Maggie secretively made sure no one was looking and did her business.

Ace in the Hole…

I realized I am just a trifle when it comes to Laura whom I am chatting with on the internet.  She has hopes of moving back in with her long time boyfriend Richard and I am just plan B or C.  She wrote on Facebook yesterday that they are having talks about it.  If all else fails, then she can turn to me.  Her long time boyfriend wrote “Miss You!” on her Facebook homepage yesterday.  I am probably just going to ignore her chat requests today.  I am getting too old and way too jaded for games such as these and she does so with this childlike innocence – kind of simple minded.  I’m worth more than that and deserve better. Hell, I don’t need to be dating anyway with my social anxiety the way it is these days.

Three Reuben's Please…

“Are you going to eat both those Reuben sandwiches?” my mother asked incredulously as I paid for our meal.

“I sure am,” I replied with a silly grinning smirk. “I am on reprieve of my diet for one day.”

I was just ravishingly starving with my diet imbuing a sense of deprivation upon me.

Mom and I sat quietly eating our delicious suppers in a mostly deserted Arby’s.  The only noise being the incessant and thankfully soft drone of the television on the wall.

“I am also going to eat a king sized milk chocolate bar when I get home,” I told her breaking a long silence. “I am going to savor every bite.”

“Oh, that sounds so good!” my mother exclaimed. “Let’s stop at the Circle K and get me a candy bar.” 

Mom and I have strikingly similar taste buds.  My father says we have a child’s taste in food.

Charlie arrived earlier at 7pm and gave me my medications.  He was in a congenial mood as Maggie fawned all over him and put on a grand show of affection. Maggie looked like a lost puppy as Charlie got in his car and drove off. 

“You’ll see him tomorrow stinker,” I told her as she looked out the window sitting on the couch.

Charlie told me he is grilling burgers and steaks for the 4th of July festivities. 

“I’ll make sure you get a big plate full of food,” he said to me as he cleaned my kitchen. 

Photo Credit:   https://starchaser187.wordpress.com/2014/09/07/hersheys-milk-chocolate-bar-review/

Yee Haw!

It will be just one more short hour until Charlie arrives. Yee Haw! I have a plumber named Mike coming at 7pm as well.  My bathroom sink stopped up and Drano didn’t do a damn thing to fix it. Mike works a day job and does plumbing in his off time.  He does excellent work.  Charlie taught me about Mike. Mike also installed my new water heater a few months back.

I wonder what treat Charlie is going to bring the Magster and I? I know I am getting my medications.  I hope I also get a big, gigantic, delicious, caffeine infused Coca-Cola as Charlie has been known to bring me.  I will be so glad to see him.  It has been a long, lonely day and Charlie’s demeanor and company will brighten the surroundings.

Mom just called sounding like her normal self again. Chipper. She wants to go get a Reuben sandwich and curly fries at Arby’s.  I told her that sounded like a good plan to me.  I told her I would pick her up under the portico at 8pm. She sounded really excited. 

Mom just gets lonesome as well and will medicate herself to make herself sleep and escape the world.  When I drank beer all the time, it was to quell the pain I was feeling inside of me.   You forget your problems after a six pack of beer or a couple bottles of wine.  For mom, it is a handful of Xanax so I can understand why she does what she does.  

Photo Credit:   http://pesinworld.com/2013/03/

And Let the Games Begin…

“What day is it and what time is it?” my mother asked me during a phone call this afternoon.

She sounded garbled like she had been asleep for days on end and like she had a mouth full of marbles.

“It is almost 1pm on a Thursday,” I replied extremely aggravated and agitated.

“Has your daddy left?” she then asked me.

“He left this morning at 6am,” I told her brusquely.

“Mom?” I asked.

She said yes.

“Don’t stay in a Xanax haze the whole time dad is gone,” I said. “I want to do some stuff with you. We have plans.”

“I haven’t been taking any Xanax,” my mother replied very defensively.

“Mom, you can’t bullshit a bullshitter,” I replied. “I drank heavily for twenty plus years and I know all the tricks of the trade. How much have you had?”

“I took eight only because I can’t sleep without them,” she told me apologetically sounding more lucid.

“Get yourself sobered up and I’ll take us to go get a hamburger after Charlie brings my medications. It will be my treat,” I said. “And for heaven’s sake don’t take so many at one time. That’s got to be dangerous.  You are prescribed three a day.”

Mom promised me she was going to get out of the bed and go read awhile and watch TV until she got back on her feet. She profusely apologized to me.  She said she was extremely excited about going to get a bite to eat tonight.

In a perfect world, I would get the Xanax away from her and just give her three a day.  I might just have to do that with my key to their house.  She keeps them in her purse and would never know I was in the room she sleeps so soundly.  She also keeps another stash in her closet in a red shoe that even my father doesn’t know about.

Photo Credit:   http://www.sarkisfamilypsychiatry.com/xanax-brand-name-price

Wayward Bound…

Tomorrow, my father embarks on a journey from Atlanta to San Diego.  He will then help my brother drive his two cars back to Alabama.  I don’t envy him of that task.  That is one helluva long drive, although I did volunteer to help.  They are going to be gone for two weeks. They are making a pit stop in St. Louis to visit some relatives of my father.

“You’re going to have to keep an eye on your mother while I am gone,” my father told me while I was over at their house last hour getting my sodas.

Dad was diligently paying bills online in preparation for his departure.

I asked mom if there was anything she wanted to do and she started naming off things she would like for us to accomplish.  I laughed goodheartedly as the list grew and grew.

“I want to go eat Chic-fil-a one evening and Chinese the next week,” she told me as a few things she wanted to do.

Mom also wants to go to Books-a-Million once again. She has quite a few books on order to keep her preoccupied while my father is gone.

“Let’s get us a chocolate shake while we are down there!”

“Can you think of anything neat you want to buy at Best Buy?” she then asked me.

“I can think of dozens of neat things I would like from Best Buy,” I replied with a laugh as my mother then chuckled nervously biting off more than she could chew.

I will probably get me another mouse or keyboard as I collect the things.  No more wireless mice or keyboards, though.  The things eat batteries if you use your computer as much as I do.

Photo Credit:  https://www.flickr.com/photos/raymondyue/4212301977

Remember James Horner with these 17 Scores…

James Horner was one of my favorite film score composers.  Here is a sampling of some of the scores he wrote since the eighties.  I still can’t believe he’s dead.  He died in a plane crash last week near Santa Barbara.   My favorite composition from him has to be The Princess Pleads for Wallace’s Life off the Braveheart soundtrack.  It is just a beautiful piece of work.

Life is so fickle.  Embrace it while you can…

http://www.ew.com/article/2015/06/23/james-horner-scores-titanic