Tuesday may be the first day of September, but it will feel more like July in much of the country. Highs in the low to mid 90s will be common from the central and southern Plains across the southeast and into the mid-Atlantic. Highs over 100 will be common in the desert southwest. The hot weather is expected to continue in many areas through the Labor Day weekend.
Monday, August 31, 2015
Food and Drink–There is Plenty…
“Dad? Do you all have any food left from the reunion this weekend?” I timidly asked my father. “I need some tender loving care pretty badly this morning.”
I never know how my father will react in these kinds of situations. He said all that Laura stuff had gotten me off kilter.
“Come over and I will fix you up a care package,” he replied surprisingly warmly.
It was misting slightly as I drove. The skies were overcast and dreary. Would the sun make its appearance known?
Dad had given me my regular allotment of 6 diet Sunkist, 2 turkey sandwiches, a box of oatmeal cookies, 2 slices of chocolate pound cake, and 4 regular Coca-Colas he knew I would enjoy. It completely lifted my spirits and I feel fine now and upbeat. I’ve had my fix for the day.
Photo credit: http://cookingontheside.com/chocolate-chip-oatmeal-cookies/
http://jensfavoritecookies.com/2013/04/19/chocolate-pound-cake/
Time to Feed the Hungry Among Us…
Yes, it is another grocery day where Andrew pontificates about what he is going to buy. It is going to be sandwich week here at Andrew’s Casa again. My favorite wheat bread is Roman Meal, but our Kroger can be hit or miss about carrying it. Let’s hope they have it tonight.
I am going to make tuna fish salad and egg salad for the fillings. I am also going to buy plenty of Carving Board cold cuts and cheeses like pepper jack, sharp cheddar, muenster and Swiss.
Should I buy my usual 5 gallons of Milo’s sweet tea? I did without this week. I will let you know tonight. I’ve been drinking ice water all week and it gets old. I would welcome my old friend Milo back into my life. The diet sodas I get only last about two hours as I compulsively drink them one after another.
I Can Be Rip Van Winkle as Well…
I’ve been sleeping all the time lately. I sleep more times than I am up. Dad says it is depression, but I don’t feel depressed. Just sleepy. I can stay up for about 4 or 5 hours and then I am back to sleep.
photo credit: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Egg_salad
Sunday, August 30, 2015
Captain Dave Commands this Ship…
“Your daddy wants to know if you will eat Captain D’s?” my mother asked about an hour ago on the phone.
“Sure!” I replied excitedly. “Get me the jumbo fish platter and please don’t forget the malt vinegar!”
Mom called dad on his cellphone to tell him yes. It is going to be a nice change from our usual fried chicken.
Laura called me two hours ago and we talked for about 30 minutes. It was as if nothing had ever happened. I felt caught in some strange wormhole or miasma about the whole affair.
“Wayne’s trying to call me,” she said abruptly ending the call. “I will call you right back.”
Well, I guess that was short and sweet, but she never called back. Mom quickly called me to ask me what Laura said.
“Just stuff I guess,” I told my mother. “It was much ado about nothing. She acted like nothing ever happened, though. Mom, something's not quite right about her and I can’t put my finger on it.”
Mr. Super Mario to You…
The unique and fascinating thing about this game cartridge was that there was a coprocessor inside working in conjunction with the processor inside the gaming console: The Super Nintendo Entertainment system.
Photo credit: http://firsthour.net/first-hour-review/super-mario-rpg
Waiting For Full Bellies…
Charlie should be here in about 5 hours. He usually arrives around 9am. I am starving and especially keen on that gigantic Coca-Cola Charlie brings me every Sunday. I hope he brings an orange juice as well as that has been our modus operandi along with two bacon, egg, and cheese biscuits and a hash brown, for the longest time.
I made some homemade crunchy peanut butter, banana, and honey dog muffins yesterday for Maggie. She will get two muffins this morning as I eat my breakfast. (An Aside: With wanton abandon, I ate one of the muffins yesterday myself and they do taste delicious. Maggie better watch out before I eat all her treats!)
Photo Credit: http://veronicascornucopia.com/tag/dog-muffins/
You Don’t Know What You’ve Got ‘Til it is Gone…
Laura’s completely ignoring me online now and she no longer calls at all. She can see when I sign into Facebook chat. She’s burning all her bridges and there is going to be nobody to come and get her when she realizes the colossal blunder and mistake she has made. You don’t put all your eggs into one basket as the old saying goes. Even poor Richard, her hapless, goofy, last boyfriend she lived with for months, is being ignored.
Me? I’m not a very good friend because I am kind of glad it is all over now. It was expensive taking her out to eat every week, and I don’t think she appreciated it. It was amazing my father paid for all that without even a grumble or a flinch. Also, it will give me time to lick my wounds are far as my social anxieties are concerned. I have to admit that it does hurt being scorned like that, though.
My parents are very glad this has happened as my father says I am naïve about such womanly things and “that lady” was taking advantage of my soft hearted nature.
“You don’t need to be with a lady that’s been married three times,” my mother also told me over the phone last night. “That’s a surefire warning sign!”
Saturday, August 29, 2015
The Ultimate of Suckage Bestowed Upon Me…
I changed the comments to allow only registered users which I should’ve done a long time ago. Nothing sucks more than pouring out your heart and soul into a blog post and you only just get one snarky anonymous comment in return. Well, that changes as of now.
The sad thing is that it is always someone you know – a regular reader of the blog as they know lots of details about your life. Is anyone able to explain this phenomenon? It’s akin to kicking a homeless person sleeping on the corner with no way to defend himself. It happens on a lot of blogs I read. Nobody caught more hell than “The Homeless Guy”. He hasn’t had comments on his blog for years now. It’s akin to the schoolyard bullying I experienced as a child, but I had a tangible way to fight back. It is hard to believe that adults are leaving these kinds of posts – soulless adults without hearts I might add. People will hate you and yet they still read.
Class of 1964 Reunion Time…
Today is my parent’s informal gathering of their annual class reunion. They are going to eat at Milano’s, a local Italian restaurant, and then come back to my parent’s house to mingle, converse, and eat dessert and drink spirited drinks. This has kept my parent’s busy preparing all week – my father mostly. Mom has been too sick to really help. Charlie has helped some as well doing some touchup painting around the interior of the house like the banisters on the stairs.
Things to Look Forward to Today…
6:39am -- As soon as 9am rolls around, I am driving over to get my Helen to-go plates. Helen’s creamed potaters were most excellent this week. I also adored the yellow summer squash with Vidalia onions. I am also going to call Charlie and see if he will let me take Horsefly to the movies down in Auburn. I will watch whatever movie Horsefly watches. This will be a big load off Charlie’s back if he accepts.
Friday, August 28, 2015
The (Sometimes) Long Wait for Medications…
“He’s asleep and snoring in his recliner,” mom quietly told me a moment ago when I called after 9pm to get the skinny on the situation.
Mom has been really sick with a bad cold and sounded so much better today.
“Has he had a few glasses of wine?” I asked my mother trepiditiously.
“Yes,” she said. “It makes him very sleepy when he’s had a few glasses.”
“Well shit,” I replied as my hopes plummeted. “Wake him up, but make it seem like you are doing him a favor.”
My mother chuckled nervously with a hushed voice. “I don’t know how to do that!”
photo credit: http://charoylee.com/Unit_5.html
Helen’s Soul Food Friday’s…
This afternoon we had baked ham, fried okra, creamed potatoes, green beans, summer squash, and cornbread.
The Ill Among Us–We Comfort Them…
“Would you like to get on the internet?” I asked Alan this afternoon as I had tagged along and he excitedly said yes squeezing my hand firmly.
I called Charlie at work and he said the house is already hooked to the internet, but Alan couldn’t get to a computer with him being bed ridden.
“I’ve got a handle on the situation,” I told Charlie and then hung up.
I got my extra wireless router covered with dust and languishing in my computer room, an extra Ethernet cable, and my iPad with a clean install of iOS (the hardest part) and installed them to where Alan could get on the internet. You’ve never seen a happier fellow. Al has been a good friend to me and deserves no less. Alan got me the job working at the University all those many years ago and the hefty taxes on all those years working there got me a decent disability allotment when I got too ill to work.
“That’s the first time I’ve seen him smile in days,” Janice, Charlie’s wife, told me as I was leaving.
photo credit: http://www.chanhvuong.com/720/purchasing-a-wireless-router-for-real-people/
Loss for Words…
I guess I am just generally sad and my feelings are hurt. I cancelled Laura’s and my “date” this evening to China Moon. I looked at a menu and the entrees were running around $16 and $17 dollars and I just don’t have the heart to ask my father for that much money. I did it a cheap way via text as well. Yeah, I copped out. She will see the text around 10am when when she awakes. I was beginning to feel used and abused. Unlike me, I am at a loss for words for the most part. We have quickly drifted apart as her union with Wayne approaches next Wednesday. I guess I had grown more attached to Laura than I realized. I firmly believe in and around a month she will be calling me or another friend to come and get her.
Things that Have Drastically Changed Very Quickly…
- She used to call me 3 or 4 times a day and that has dwindled to a 10 minute phone call once a day or even skipping a day.
- She would always call me “sweetie” and “darlin’” in our text messages and that quit. She will start each message to me with just a general “hey” now.
- She is now calling herself by his last name as if they were married. I told her that was mighty presumptuous of her.
Thursday, August 27, 2015
Damn, She’s Fine…
The beautiful Ms. Adia gave me my shot this morning. Her smile is contagious and I caught myself smiling the whole time of this tedious task – the task of getting my injection.
“What do you think of my Auburn scrunchy?” she asked with a girlish giggle.
“Where’s Rebecca?” I asked her after giving her a compliment.
“She’s running late,” Adia said. “So I decided to go ahead and give you your injection.”
“Well, that is just awesome,” I said ecstatically and also relieved.
“I knew you wouldn’t want to wait until she got here.”
“Which side?” she asked, meaning what butt cheek.
“We did the left side last time,” I said. “So let’s do the right side this time.”
I got another lease on two weeks and headed to the pharmacy to give my father the new appointment card.
Fun Gluteal and Intravenously…
Yes, this morning is my injection. It is a wonder my butt cheeks don't look like the crater pocked surface of the moon. The intervals between my injections just seem to fly by as well. Dad told me last night during the medication ritual to be ready at 8am for a 9am appointment this morning. Well, it is 4:14am and I am definitely ahead of the game. I’m not sure if it is my waning medications or just plain tiredness, but I’ve been terribly groggy for the past few days getting my fair share of sleep. I also keep the strangest of hours as well. I woke up at 4am and feel well rested.
Super Mario Madness…
“I’ve gone retro,” I told him. “I am playing all the games of our youth that we didn’t get to play because we couldn’t afford them as kids. I am playing Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars at the moment.”
My brother told me that newer consoles and computer games have just gotten far too complex for the average gamer and I agreed with him wholeheartedly. Awesome graphics do not make a fun game.
“You have to be hardcore to get into those run and gun genre of games,” I replied to my brother.
Those games are all the rage at the moment much to my chagrin. My idea of fun is not running around and shooting things.
Wednesday, August 26, 2015
Cookies For a Good Cause…
Dad typically buys his and mom’s groceries on Wednesday night. I told him my sweet tooth was acting up lately during the medication ritual tonight and I needed something sweet to eat really, really badly. I forgot to get anything sweet on my last visit to the grocery store. In illicit drug terms, they call this jonesing.
“I’ll get you some of those vanilla cookies I love,” my father told me cheerily. “They’re cheap, but they taste delicious.”
I was surprised at how easy that was, and my father is even bringing them to me.
“I am coming by your house now and dropping the cookies off,” my father just called and told me.
He called one more time when he pulled up in front of my house.
This is very out of character for my father to do this. He is not much one for altruism for Andrew of this sort. I guess he felt sorry for me as I sounded pretty pitiful when I asked him.
A Perfunctory Type of Morning…
5:13am – The washing machine is spinning loudly. Spaghetti and meat sauce is warming on the stove. Maggie is munching on her nibbles in the bedroom. If it were sunshiny outside you would almost think it was the middle of the afternoon here at Andrew’s casa.
I have a pretty busy day ahead. My father I are going to be juggling cars this afternoon getting them to and from the shop. I desperately need an oil change and windshield wipers.
“I will call you an hour before we have to leave to pick up my car,” my father told me last night during the medication ritual .
Goodbye Dearest Laura…
Well, it is official. Laura leaves next Wednesday to go live with that dastardly Wayne. Laura’s sister is dropping her off at the halfway point in Macon, Georgia where Wayne will pick her up. I told her if he begins to treat her badly then I was going to find a way to Statesboro to come and get her.
Laura told me last night in one last revelation that Wayne was a convicted felon for committing armed robbery and spent several years in prison awhile back. Why do some women just love terrible men – the bad boys? That certainly didn't sound too promising. It sounded dangerous!
“Doesn’t that give you pause?” I asked her last night worriedly falling upon deaf ears.
In Laura’s eyes, Wayne can never do any wrong. She’s infatuated and in love with the man and the idea of starting afresh with a new life in Statesboro.
Our last meal together will be at China Moon in Lagrange Friday afternoon. Laura warned me that it was pricey at $17 an entree, but I told her not to worry about it. We can splurge for our last meal together. I am going to try to get her to stay home with her parents one more time.
Tuesday, August 25, 2015
Son, We Are Going to Have to Let You Go…
“Things have healed very nicely,” he told me looking at the x-rays of my foot. “There is no need for you to come back. We are letting you go.”
I grinned and quickly put my socks and shoes back on. Dr. Martin said “War Damn Eagle!” as we parted ways in the hall.
I dropped mom off at home and was chomping at the bit to get out to the Veterinarian and see about the Magster. Maggie was fine when I got out there and was completely overjoyed to see me. She was a tad dismayed and barking so very loudly and frantically telling me to get her the hell out of this stinky, crazy place.
I am going to have to give her antibiotics for two weeks, puts drops in her ears and eyes, and give her a frequent antibiotic bath. She already looked 100% better after her grooming session. Now, I can clearly see Maggie’s eyes.
Now, the game is afoot. Can I catch the crafty Mags to give her all these treatments? She’s like a greased pig at the county fair.
Photo Credit: http://radiopaedia.org/cases/slow-flow-vascular-malformation-of-foot
Monday, August 24, 2015
Godspeed Dearest Maggie…
Maggie's got multiple things that need taking care of. First off, she’s got another ear infection. We also have that cataract to contend with. She also has a nasty yeast infection on her chest which is inflamed and sore from her constant scratching. Her nails also need trimming as she will limp when they got really long.
So as you can see Maggie is definitely due for a tune-up.
Sunday, August 23, 2015
He’s in his Captain’s Chair…
“Let me show you something,” I said to my father as I stood up from my recliner – I call it the captain’s chair.
Dad was sitting on the couch with Maggie and I sneaked into my computer room and loudly played a video of two cats vigorously and violently fighting. Maggie went absolutely nuts – viciously barking I tell you. My father burst out into laughter.
“You shouldn't do that dog that way,” my father told me still laughing. “She thinks they're really cats in her house.”
photo credit: http://animalist.com/coletheblackcat/cats-with-sound-effects-vol-1/
My Little Bit of Instant Bliss…
Let’s Go Get this Chicken on the Road…
Sunday’s are a cherished day of abundance. Charlie will be by soon this morning with breakfast and then we will have Kentucky Fried Chicken tonight. I know I sound like a broken record, but these routines are so important to me. Are there other families whose routines are so regimented and important? Are we all creatures of habit? Sometimes it is fun to be spontaneous as well – throwing caution to the wind. They do say variety is the spice of life you know?
The Good Lord Doth Smite Thine Eye…
Lightning Photo: http://www.quotez.rocks/2015/04/19/thunderstorm-and-lightning-storm/thunderstorm-and-lightning-storm-20150419074721-55335d897d5a2-jpg/
Dog Photo: http://www.avmamedia.org/display.asp?sid=270&NAME=Canine_Cataracts
Saturday, August 22, 2015
Say Goodnight and Go…
“I’ve been looking forward to this all day,” Laura said as the waitress put two glasses of sweet iced tea on our table.
At Applebee’s, we got the 1 appetizer and 2 entrees for $25 dollar deal – we shared an appetizer of fried mozzarella sticks and then we got the double crunch fried shrimp as our entrees. The entrees were accompanied by a baked potato and cole slaw. Both were delicious and filling. I know I posted a derogatory article on my blog months ago that Applebee’s and Olive Garden were the two worst chain restaurants in the States, but our food was very tasty and freshly prepared tonight. I was pleasantly surprised by the food and service.
After Applebee’s, we drove up to Wendy’s and we both got medium chocolate frosties. Inside the restaurant was absolutely freezing so we sat out in my car to finish our desserts.
Laura let me off my leash after dinner and told me to find my way back to her house without her help. I didn't take one wrong turn in traffic ridden Lagrange and soon pulled into Laura’s driveway with us safe and sound.
“I hate to say goodnight and go,” I told Laura hugging her. “But I am always just a phone call or text away.”
“Call me when you get home safe,” she replied.
As I drove home on Old West Point Rd. avoiding the interstate, I marveled to myself how far I have come these past few years. Barbara? (my cherished therapist) Thank you!
Saturday My Way…
I am picking up Laura at 5pm and we are heading to Applebee’s. I always get completely lost in Lagrange and Laura has to be my copilot. It is a complete maze of one-way streets and traffic lights.
“Can we get dessert?” Laura asked me last night excitably almost pleadingly.
“We can if we get one of the $8.99 gourmet burger plates and no steaks,” I replied.
I am going to be cheap and get the $7.99 “classic” burger plate instead of one of their other frou frou specialty burgers. I will have only $40 to spend this evening I suspect. It is going to depend on whether or not my father is in a generous mood this afternoon. He insists lately on paying for these little outings out of his pocket. “Live within your means,” I can hear him say now as he has always done over the years.
The photo is Applebee’s triple chocolate meltdown. That is the dessert I have decided on getting this evening. It is kind of expensive at $6.49, but you only live once. If I don’t' have enough money, then we are headed to the Dairy Queen for some hot fudge sundaes which are completely inexpensive in comparison.
Friday, August 21, 2015
Want!!!
Always wanting what you can’t have, Andrew! I can only imagine being able to download at 110 Megabytes per second or in less misleading terms 11 Megabits per second.
Sending Out An S.O.S. to Helen…
Why am I Afraid? Nervous?
I am dancing around an iffy and very delicate issue. Shall I be the proverbial bull in the china shop with regards to my father? Do I start the dialogue with him about dropping my cable television and getting the $60 a month 110 Mbps internet? Dad’s a wildcard and I never know how he is going to react. It is times like these I wish I wasn’t so dependent upon my parents for so many things. A 43 year old man should just simply make the call and change his service which would take all of ten minutes, but I need the last four digits of dad’s social security number to get access to the account. I seem to always have hurdles to jump and they always seem so oppressive and insurmountable. Hey, to look on the bright side at least I am not a Jewish prisoner in Auschwitz. Thinking of that always puts me in my place and makes me thankful for what I have in the here and now.
Art Form…
This really cracked me up being a liberal arts music education major in college. You’ve got to love some good satire like this.
The Bond that Hopefully Shall Not Be Broken…
On that same train of thought, friends should bring you up and not down. My friendship with Laura is helping me ease into the warm waters of camaraderie – dipping my toe in first. I also try to stay ever cognizant that friendship is a two way street. What can I do today to make my friend’s life enjoyable? Are you okay? You know I care about you is what I told Laura before midnight worried about this whole Wayne situation. She quickly reciprocated. I assured Laura that I would come get her and bring her home if things didn't work out with Wayne.
I raise my glass to and toast friendship and all it entails. May a friend be with you.
photo credit: https://plus.google.com/115885970116296142164/posts
Thursday, August 20, 2015
Exsultate Justi…
When will the esteemed Papa arrive after work this evening? I am betting on 9pm. The pharmacy closed forty minutes ago. Dad has to backup the computer database and then reconcile the registers. Then he will be on his way if he doesn't stop to get a bite to eat first. I am unsure of whether Charlie and family are back in the Valley. Dad may have to take care of Horsefly again. That will be an estimated 10pm time of arrival if that occurs.
Friends Forever?
“Why don’t you just call her?” my father said last night nagging me.
Now, that would be too easy! I felt the ball was in her court. I was also beginning to worry I had committed some kind of severe social gaffe. Well, I was delighted when I picked up the phone this afternoon and there was a chipper Laura on the other end. We talked for about 30 minutes catching each other up on the past two day’s happenings.
“Everyday seems to drag by,” Laura told me wistfully. “I don’t think the third will ever get here for me to be with my man.”
That statement made me roll my eyes in frustration. Old Wayne ain’t going to be here on the the third of next month and it is going to break my friend's heart. He walked off his job yesterday which was a major setback. Working was the only way Wayne was to get the cash to fund the trip to Lagrange.
“Where do you want to eat this weekend?” I then asked her sending our conversation in a more positive direction. “It is going to be your choice. We can eat anywhere you choose.”
“Let’s go to Applebee’s and get a good gourmet burger,” Laura replied.
That sounded like a good plan to me and wallet friendly as well. I especially enjoy Applebee’s bacon and blue cheese burger if it is still on the menu. We will also drive the short distance up the highway to Wendy’s and get a frosty for dessert.
Photo credit: http://www.applebees.com/menu/handcrafted-burgers/cowboy-burger
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
And the Bell Tolls 10:00pm…
“He was sitting happily rocking in his recliner watching Dora the Explorer when I left,” my father told me of Horsefly tonight as I eagerly took my medications.
I always fiercely worry something will happen to Horsefly when he is left alone overnight like that, but he pretty much just rocks in his recliner all night fixated on that night’s plush doll toy of choice.
Dad will stop by in the morning to make a quick breakfast of grits and get Horsefly in the bed.
Mobilizing the Emergency Schizophrenia Medication Squad…
I am currently listening to Tibetan music as Maggie snores at my feet. I am hoping the chant will give me a little Zen until my medications take effect about 11:30pm. I highly recommend Jeff Beal’s Tibet: Cry of the Snow Lion soundtrack for some soothing and interesting music.
photo credit: http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2012/04/the-top-4-drugs-that-can-land-you-in-the-emergency-room/255069/
Fish Gotta Swim and Birds Gotta Fly…
Too Much Sugar and Too Much Caffeine…
Photo Credit: http://www.overcaffeinated.org/database/soda-pop/sprite-zero/
Alms for the Ails of the Ill…
I was sitting on my porch tonight listening to the din of the katydids as I browsed the internet on my iPad. (Isn’t Wi-Fi awesome?) I was in what I call my zone. There was a cool breeze and it felt wonderful. Maggie sat on the floor at my feet with her ears constantly moving as she picked up sounds and things that caught her interest. My little companion was quiet tonight. No barking. Maggie loves for us to sit out on the screened in porch. My cellphone was sitting on my little wrought iron table next to me and it began to buzz. It was almost midnight and my mother was calling.
“Do you ever feel anxious?” mom asked me in her first volley.
“All the time, why?” I replied in return.
Anxious is my true first name – Anxious Andrew.
“I feel so terribly anxious tonight,” she morosely said. “I feel like I am going to completely jump out of my skin. Your daddy would just say it was a cry for attention, but I do feel really badly mentally.”
“You know I hate to tell you to take your Xanax, but tonight might be a good time to take a few,” I told her.
“I am going to take six Xanax, let them take effect, and then go to bed.”
“Sounds like a good plan,” I told my mother as my final reply.
Mom told me good night and that she loved me. Hopefully, she took some medications and went to bed. I hope she sleeps well and she should.
Hasta La Vista Fox News…
My high definition flat screen television gave up the ghost last night. I am not going to buy another. I am going to get dad to cancel my cable TV service as I rarely watched television if at all. We now can get internet service unbundled and I want my father to get the 110 Mbps service which is $60 a month. I am going to have to play my cards very carefully to get this to come to fruition. Dad is going to have a very hard time understanding what I am trying to accomplish. I can hear him shriek in horror at the thought of living without the television.
Tuesday, August 18, 2015
Waiting on Goddard. I Mean Papa…
“I hope he doesn’t bowl any darn gutter balls,” my father told me on his cellphone awhile ago. “He is already a sweaty mess. We’d all lose weight if we bowled like this!”
I had called him to warn him I was driving over to get my sodas after talking to my mother on the phone. I didn't want him to arrive and I wasn’t home. It was already 9pm.
“Go on and hurry,” my father told me.
Well, soon, Dad and Horsefly arrived at my house shortly after I had arrived home with six Sprite Zeros. Horsefly was really hyper tonight and was talking a mile a minute walking from room to room at a brisk pace. Usually, I can decipher what he is saying, but couldn’t tonight.
“What is he saying?” I asked my father.
“I don’t know,” my father replied. “I can’t make it out either.”
Horsefly went into my bathroom and flushed my toilet over ten times. Dad looked at me with a funny look on his face worried Horsefly was going to tear up my toilet. All the while, Maggie was taking in every bit of this. Maggie is no longer scared of Horsefly, but looks upon him as a interesting curiosity.
photo credit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/opoterser/4915106328
A Ride With A View…
“Veronica’s computer screen at home went out,” he told me. “Do you have one she could use?”
Veronica has worked for my dad for years and years, and now works for the new owners of the pharmacy. She is one of my Facebook buddies. I also find her one of the more gorgeous creatures that inhabit my life.
“I have a huge 27 inch screen sitting in my computer room,” I told him. “I will bring it to the pharmacy when I get awake.”
Just one of the six monitors I own. Five of which are connected to computers.
I had a ride with a view on the way to the pharmacy. An absolutely huge and massive thunderhead had formed to the south of us which I marveled at. It thrilled me to death to get to see that. I hoped it would grace us with its presence by late afternoon. It was truly a panoramic view of one of the marvels of nature.
Veronica basically flagellated herself upon me groveling she was so overjoyed about the new monitor. I carefully set it in the back of the trunk of her car which we all affectionately call the Easter egg. It’s an economy minded Hyundai shaped like an egg in a pastel blue color.
“Tell dad I will see him tonight,” I told Veronica as I got in my car and drove home with little formalities. .
Photo Credit: http://www.nps.gov/features/yell/slidefile/celestialatmospheric/Weather/Page.htm
53 Smackeroos…
“Your finished already?!?” my father exclaimed as he was looking at some greeting cards next to the magazine rack. “Come on! Let’s head on out. I’ve got to get Horsefly’s chicken fingers before Kentucky Fried closes at 9pm.”
I had so few items we could go through the 15 items or less express lane. I felt kind of stymied by it all – the whole process. I was not firing on all cylinders last night. Schizophrenia was playing tricks with my mind. I couldn’t relay this to my father as he unloaded my buggy and put my groceries on the conveyor belt. He was bantering jovially with the cashier and being the extrovert he is. I wanted to cry out, “HELP!”
Then came the part I hate most about buying groceries – unloading them all and putting them away. It was still raining at a good clip when I arrived home. I rushed back and forth from my car until everything was in the kitchen. Then I put the frozen stuff away first and then made room in the fridge for 6 gallons of tea.
Something was very amiss with me last night. It dawned on me in a moment of clarity that we had forgotten to take my medications as we usually do before going to the grocery store.
“Dad?” I told my father over his cellphone. “We forgot to take my medications.”
“Holy shit!” my father exclaimed. “We sure did. I will be by your house in ten minutes. Doing all this for Horsefly’s got me bumfuzzled.”
“Do you have some loaf bread?” dad asked me after we had fed and watered Maggie.
“I have some in the freezer,” I replied.
“Thaw some out because there is a whole plate of sliced tomatoes sitting on your piano,” he said. “I thought you might like some mator sandwiches for lunch tomorrow. I already salted and peppered the slices.”
I had to wait an hour after dad gave me my medications before I could eat those delicious chicken salad sandwiches. I gave my medications time to soak in and then I pigged out! Dad’s chicken salad was better than I had remembered. This great comforting calm overcame me as I curled up in my recliner with my iPad. Maggie jumped up in the chair with me and all was right in my world.
Monday, August 17, 2015
Medications and Conversations…
“You look really good tonight,” my father cheerily told me as he finagled with my medication packet. “You look so healthy these days. You always looked like you were on death’s door when you were drinking so heavily.”
Dad handed me my mouthful of medications and gulped them all down at once with some KFC sickly sweet tea. Dad then patted me on my knee and wanted me to tell him all about my day. I told him mainly about Maggie’s antics with my new neighbors. Maggie doesn’t quite know what to do with these new tenants in Joyce’s house. She will sit outside and watch them. If they move too fast, she will bark alarmingly.
“Have you talked to your new neighbors?” dad asked intrigued.
“Oh, yes!” I replied. “They seem to be like good, down-to-earth people. Their air-conditioning is out and that’s why they are sitting outside on the patio so much.”
“Well, Chuck!” dad said as he got up. “I hate to run, but I’ve got to go get Horsefly up and going. He needs a bath and his chicken fingers. Let’s go feed and water Maggie.”
Charlie’s oldest son took another turn for the worse the other night and is back in the hospital at UAB in Birmingham.
The Cornucopia Opens…
Tonight, I will get the ingredients for my spaghetti and meat sauce once again. Like I’ve said before, that will feed me six days and I have Helen’s meals on the weekend (usually three meals). Charlie brings me breakfast Sunday morning and then we have Kentucky Fried Chicken on Sunday night. If I can just make it to Friday without giving out of food. Although, I am also toying with the idea of buying a big bulk box of pepperoni pizza Hot Pockets and then lots of sweet treats.
I ended up almost hungry this week trying to get by with those frozen meals. I had to eat fast food a few times and my father always frowns upon that. “Live within your means,” he will brusquely and heartlessly tell me. The Chili’s meals were good, but the portion sizes were a pittance. I would have to eat two of those meals to get full and feel satisfied. They were very spicy as well – spitfire spicy with lots of jalapeños and habañeros. When they wrote big, bold taste on the box, they meant it.
Photo Credits: http://tuffkidsadventure.com/how-to-make-spaghetti-with-meat-sauce/ http://www.someecards.com/usercards/viewcard/MjAxMi01ODgzZjgyNmZiZTM4YWU1
Sunday, August 16, 2015
Tired as a Dog’s Jaunt on a Dusty and Hot Southern Summer’s Day…
Maggie very, very rarely gets people food these days. Well, I just gave her a little bite of Helen’s fried chicken on a whim and created a monster. She has been driving me crazy for another bite. She is being very vocal about the whole affair I might add. She is whining as I write this with an occasional bark to get my attention.
My Charlie delivered breakfast was ruined this morning. I walked out on the porch and a giant tepid soda was sitting by the door and a big bag of McDonald’s breakfast was hanging from the door. Ants had gotten all in the bag and it was a swarm of them. I set the bag back down on the outside porch until the ants could finish their business. There were ants everywhere.
I was worn out after last night’s date. Laura can talk a mile a minute. I recharge through introspection and needed to get home and get away from other people for a little bit. A sighed a deep sigh of relief when I pulled into my driveway last night. I was home. Maggie was in the den window jubilantly barking at my arrival. “Where have you been?” she seemed to say as she sniffed me all over as I collapsed on the couch.
Laura and I ate at the Western Sizzlin in Opelika and the total tally was $39 dollars with tax. Good steaks are expensive and the ribeyes we had were absolutely delicious. Laura and I both cleaned our plates in short order. Laura marveled that I liked to pour A1 sauce in my baked potato. We finished our meal with big plates of blackberry cobbler and vanilla ice-cream. I was so stuffed that it was uncomfortable. Laura may be only a 100 pounds, but she can really put down some food. It tickled me as I thought about on the drive back to Lagrange.
Happy Birthday Papa…
“Why didn’t y’all tell me you were going out and I would have changed my plans,” I told my father last night during the medication ritual.
“I was just going to let you do your own thing tonight,” he replied. “You had been planning to eat with Laura for over a week.”
Saturday, August 15, 2015
Can I Not Post this Photo of Tamara and I in Kindergarten? Or is this Off Limits as Well?
Tamara sent me this photo tonight along with a movie invitation.
I Was Once Homeless, Too…
He quickly popped his head up out of the trashcan and looked my way as I was walking by.
“Hey, you ain’t got five bucks I can borrow?” he asked with a toothless grin.
“You hungry and thirsty?” I asked changing the subject very quickly and he said yes.
I fixed two sodas (Mountain Dew Raspberry Volts) at the soda counter and grabbed a couple of egg salad sandwiches out of the cooler. I paid and walked outside and gave the man the sandwiches and a ice cold 32oz soda. I was hoping he could get a good buzz off the caffeine in that caffeine overladen drink.
“Bless you,” he told me as he very clumsily and vigorously shook my hand.
“Just keeping the faith,” I replied as I got in my car and headed to home.
A luxury that poor soul will not have tonight. He was sitting over the no loitering sign as he began to eat his sandwiches and I pulled out of the parking lot. I chuckled at the irony.
I always said and joked when I was homeless that salvation would be a pretty lady delivering a big bag of double cheeseburgers and a case of Natural Light Ice beer. It would’ve been a homeless man’s party and wet dream come true.
Photo Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/explore/pret-a-manger/
Date Pickup Time is 4:00pm…
“Come on! Andrew can do this!” I just mumbled to myself in the third person as I buttoned up my shirt. Yes, I set my alarm clock and after 4 hours of sleep, I am up and going. I have just crawled out of hot shower which helped some. I am fixing to run get gas, my sodas, and pickup this weekend’s Helen to-go plates. I want some more of Helen’s delicious fried chicken she cooked this week. I will save that for a midnight snack tonight.
She Called Me “Baby”…
“That just slipped out,” Laura said via text apologetically. “I accidentally told Richard I loved him as well. I need to just shut up.”
“Don’t worry,” I replied. “I’m bad about calling you sweetheart, you know?”
“I hope I didn’t offend you!”
“I was flattered.”
Laura then went on to ask me if we could leave an hour early so she could shop for an Auburn “game day” shirt. I agreed to pick her up at 3:30pm and then we would head to Auburn. This means I must get to bed at a decent hour around 3am to be able to function adequately tomorrow. I can’t sleep until my usual lazy 6pm.
5:44am – I cannot sleep. I am hoping to fall asleep by 7am and sleep until noon. Shit, I get myself in the biggest fixes and messes at times. Maggie’s fully stretched out on the bed sound asleep the lucky thing.
6:00am -- I just got the bright idea to text Laura that I would pick her up at 6:00pm to go eat. No shopping. That will give me some much needed extra time to sleep.
Friday, August 14, 2015
Quintessential and Proper Southern Etiquette…
In the South, it’s usually proper etiquette to hold all doors for women for example and to pay for the meals of our womenfolk when we go out to eat. I really don’t mind paying for the meals as Laura has been a good companion for endeavors such as these. She also relishes the experience which makes me feel all warm and fuzzy that I can provide. I am just overjoyed and it brings me happiness to have a good friend to go out with. We can talk about anything and she is doing me a favor by going with me. Eating out alone sucks.
It seems I am ready to go tomorrow except for getting a full tank of gas.
photo credit: http://www.nbcnews.com/id/6122483/ns/business-us_business/t/new-bill-begins-circulating/#.Vc5jGLJVhBc
Change of Venue…
“Sure,” Laura replied sounding just a little miffed. “You’re the one who is paying. Maybe we will grill out next weekend.”
“I’ve got my heart set on a 16oz flamekist ribeye,” I told her. “And a cold garden salad with blue cheese dressing.”
We were going to grill chicken quarters and Johnsonville brats at my house Saturday afternoon with my parents. I just didn’t have time to clean the house up to my standards and mom and dad couldn't come this weekend as they have a trip to Alex City with the grandkids in mind planned already.
Phone Anxieties? Pshaw!
If you have phone anxieties then Laura is a good person to talk to. She easily leads the conversation and I let her know I am listening with the proper cues and acknowledgements. We talked about an hour tonight and was not near as fatigued as the previous conversation we had over that length. For once in my life, I actually enjoyed talking on the phone. What has the world come to? It was just good to hear Laura’s monotone and droning voice on the other end of the phone.
Thursday, August 13, 2015
Let the Wee Little Ones Have More Food…
Maggie was sitting in the backyard barking at my neighbor who was sitting on Joyce’s porch this evening.
“Maggie! Get your ass in here!” I hollered out the back door as my neighbor waved at me with my head stuck out the door.
I waved back and said, “Sorry!”
Maggie suddenly changed her bark to a more urgent, playful, and joyful tone as she came flying inside through the dog door. Papa was finally here. I walked into the den and looked out the door and it was certainly him. Maggie put on a grand show of affection.
“How are you two?” dad asked as he sat down on my sofa.
“Fair to middling,” I told him as we say in the South. “Maggie’s been barking at our new neighbors tonight.”
My father chuckled.
I had called him earlier and told him to run by Kroger and get more of Maggie’s food on his way home from work. I was happy when he brought inside a fresh bag of Purina One. The Magster ate the last of her food about a few hours ago.
Dad inhaled deeply and loudly sighed as he fumblingly handed me my medications.
“It has been a long day,” He said as his chest seemed to slump in upon itself as he sunk into the cushions on my sofa.
My medications effected me much, much more than usual tonight. An hour passed and I felt almost punch drunk by the time Laura called me back. My head was buzzing and my tongue was thick as I talked. Of course, I like to feel out of the ordinary so I thoroughly enjoyed the experience. I will be sorely disappointed if the experience doesn’t repeat itself tomorrow night.
A Good Picture of Tamara With Her Son…
Caffeine Please!
I just drove over to get my diet sodas for the day arcos diet Sprite. The phone was ringing as I walked out the door with my car key in my hand. That could only mean Laura was calling. She will call all day until she catches me awake.
“Have you got any sodas with caffeine I could have?” I asked my mother after knocking on the kitchen window.
Mom was quietly reading a book in the den she said.
“Sure!” mom replied. “Get you a Kroger sack and they are in the refrigerator downstairs.”
I got a mötley crüe of four diet Sunkist, a diet Coke, and some sparkling flavored spring water. The spring water was supposed to be invigorating. At least that’s what the label said. Antioxidants, B complex vitamins, blah, blah, blah…
“Thank you,” I said to my mother as I kissed her on the cheek. “I just needed something a little more high powered to get me awake and my motor running today.”
I unabashedly went to bed at six this morning and slept until six this afternoon.
Have all I got reading is people who don’t like me? It seems that way these days. I laughed at that comment about Tamara and the her mongoloid friend at the Hike, Bike, Run. Which is Tamara? LOL! I am not chasing the short bus looking for potential dates these days. I gave that up years ago.
You would think that all I’ve gone through blog wise that I would have gotten rid of all the scalawags. I’ve only got around 80 people reading a day and I still got a deadpan shamster?
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