A Record Was Set Tonight…

Dad called me at 8:45pm sharp tonight. The time we had agreed on earlier in the afternoon.

“Hey Chuck! You ready to go?” he asked.

“I will meet you up there,” I replied impatiently.

I grabbed my keys off the key holder and headed to the car for the short three mile drive to Kroger.

I then did my shopping and was waiting on my father to walk into the store. I parked my cart at the front of the store and stood and waited.

“You ready to checkout sir? I can get you on six.” a little black lady said.

“I am waiting on somebody,” I replied. “Thank you, though.”

“Oh, okay,” she said. “Let me know when you are ready.”

“You were quick tonight!” Old Fuss and Feathers said surprised when he finally walked in.

I must’ve been waiting ten minutes.

We checked out. I loaded up my car and I was sitting back in front of this computer at 9:19pm. It took all of 30 minutes to drive to Kroger, do my shopping tonight and to unload and put away my groceries. I knew what I wanted. I got in and I got out. It would’ve been twenty minutes if not for the wait on my father to arrive.

Life’s Little Milestones…

I was very apprehensive at first this evening. I didn’t won’t to ruin my day ending in defeat. I had lost two more pounds and I was going to try on my “skinny” blue jeans or just known simply as skinny jeans. I pulled them on expecting to have to fight getting the button clasped and they fit! They are just a little tight, but they fit. I was like, “Woo Hoo!” and immediately called my father to share the joy and good times.

“I am so proud of you son!” Old Fuss and Feathers told me. “You have really worked hard to lose that weight.”

There were days I was so hungry I could eat Maggie and I out of house and home. I’ve ridden that bike religiously every evening as well and think that does the most good. If I can diet, then anybody can diet considering my addictive personality. The trick for me has not been keeping any binge foods in the house like Hostess powdered donuts and whole milk to wash them down with. I can eat a whole bag in one sitting easily and drink two glasses of fattening milk in the process.

Tonight, we grocery shop. I intend to stick with my plan of shaved turkey sandwiches, all natural applesauce (as a sweet treat), peanut butter, whole grain crackers, and the likes. All foods I won’t binge on.

This is My Four Leaf Clover…

My TV parts have shipped and are on the way. Don’t you just love shipping tracking numbers? My packages have left Nashville and are heading south. I call such prompt shipping good luck and they didn’t contact me and tell me a part was back ordered either. Yes, my good luck charm. Now, let’s get this big Samsung TV up and operating.

Where Art Thou, Rebecca?

Injection Time! Do you prefer coffee or tea with your injection?

It was downright cold this morning as I set out for Kamath Medical and the pharmacy. The temperature was 41° degrees according to my car. I was pleased I had donned my very warm suede leather jacket. I couldn’t see out the windows of my car worth a poot due to all the dew that had formed, though. It was a crap shoot traffic wise until my car got warmed up and the windows cleared. The morning sun was also just blinding as I drove.

I got nurse Tara again today. I leerily gave her my injection as I sat down to watch the process gritting my teeth along the way. Amazingly, she did fine this morning. I was worried for nothing. She insists on injecting me in my hip and not my buttock, though. That always worries me. I told Old Fuss and Feathers I can’t help it when I got back to the pharmacy. I am like my mother in a lot of ways. We’re both very literal and we follow the instructions.

“Where is my Rebecca?” I deftly asked Tara this morning.

“She’s got a doctor’s appointment,” she replied. “She will be back in the next two weeks.”

“Oh, okay,” I said. “I was just worried about her. She has been giving me this injection for ten years.”

“She’s been here a very long time,” Tara replied blithely.

“I had worriedly thought she had quit working here,” I told Tara.

Rebecca would get in touch with me, though, if that had happened. She would have at least called my father at the pharmacy.

SAMANTHA!

Old Fuss and Feathers sounded exhausted over the phone tonight. He had to work all day for 10 hours. I had to call him to tell him I wanted to go grocery shopping Wednesday night instead of tonight. I think he was relieved that we didn’t have to go. My injection is in the morning and I have enough on my plate at the moment. I feel a lot of anxiety about that tomorrow for some reason. Maybe it was the harrowing experience with my injection two weeks ago.

“I can’t find Samantha!” dad then said worriedly. “She always greets me on the porch when I get off of work.”

“Do you want me to drive over and help you find her?” I asked.

“No, but I will call you when she turns up,” Papa replied.

“Please do!” I told him.

Andrew to the Rescue…

Well, I took the initiative and drove over to my father’s house anyway to see if I could roust Samantha out from the woods next to his house. I thought a car coming down the driveway would pique her curiosity. She was sitting in the long back driveway when I arrived. I got out and put her in the car with me and drove on to my father’s house.

“There are people worried about you, you silly cat,” I told her.

I knocked on the back door with Miss Samantha in hand. Dad was just overjoyed at seeing her.

“Bad pussy!” he said as I handed her to him. “You are being a bad pussy!”

“Come in and get you a Coke and stay a little while,” Old Fuss and Feathers told me.

So I drank a delicious and crisp diet Coke and watched a lady make a scrumptious looking lemon and raspberry cheesecake on Food TV then I headed back to my humble home.

Tracy? Not All Chipper and Happy?

I’ve only seen Tracy in a bad mood one more time. That was the day she broke up with Michael and she was all teary eyed and sanguine.

“He called me last night saying he missed me,” Tracy told me as we were shooting the shit in the kennels. “I knew I shouldn’t have answered the phone.”

“Then he had the audacity to say it was my fault we broke up!” Tracy declared looking flabbergasted. “I scoffed loudly! He was the one sleeping around with all those women from Match.com. I am tempted to go get tested for venereal disease and HIV.”

“You’d be crazy to go back with Michael,” I told her carefully. “If he will do it once, he will do it again.”

“Oh, I am not going back with him. I kicked him to the curb!” Tracy replied adamantly. “All of his stuff is out of the apartment and he is living with his parents!”

I chuckled at the living with his parents part and told Tracy why I was chuckling. It was also the first smile I had seen out of Tracy all morning.

Are They Here Yet?

Maggie sat patiently in the window watching out for Charlie and Papa as I sat fiddling with my tablet computer tonight. Every car that drove by piqued Maggie’s interest and she sighed when it wasn’t them. Then there was this one peculiar looking car that pulled up to the curb, but didn’t turn its lights off. Could this be them?

“Papa and Charlie are here!!!” I decreed and Maggie went apeshit bananas jumping on and off the couch repetitively.

I walked out to the car to help them carry everything in careful to leave the screen door shut so Maggie could look out and see everything that was going on..

“Have we got a hungry dog?” Old Fuss and Feathers asked with a big grin as we walked across my front yard.

Maggie was barking fervently through the screen door like a mad dog.

“I got Maggie a big treat,” Old Fuss and Feathers told me. “She’s got a big box of chicken strips!”

I thanked dad for doing that for Maggie. Variety truly is the spice of life as I had written earlier in the day. I know she gets so tired of her dog food. Maggie ate the strips about as fast as I could put them on the floor.

We only had one SNAFU in that all the drinks were regular drinks and not diet. Charlie and them don’t drink sodas so they give them all to me. I drank one and poured the other three down the sink. It was just too tempting not to as I love a sugary soda and I could see me gorging myself on the rest of those sugary drinks.

CYA = Cover Your Ass…

I just ordered this part – a backlight power inverter for my television. It was just $12. That way if it is not the television’s power supply then this can be the only other part at fault. If this doesn’t work, then that means the bulbs are bad. The TV will have to be sadly junked.

I am so excited and can’t wait for the parts to get here. I am hoping I will install the power motherboard and things will work fine again. I can’t wait to press that power button and find out as the TV comes to life. Now, where am I going to put a television this big? Or am I counting my chickens before they hatch?

Such a Much More Reasonable Time…

My good buddy Charlie didn’t show up until 10am this morning with breakfast. I was still in bed when Maggie’s proximity radar went off and loud barking ensued. She then realized it was Charlie and put on a grand show of affection.

“Put some clothes on,” Charlie said with a laugh. “You’re as immodest as your father.”

I answered the door in my gray skivvies and a white t-shirt.

“The next Sunday I will wear my red thong,” I quipped at Charlie.

“Oh hush!” Charlie said laughing some more.

Back to the business at hand.

“They were out of sausage so I got you and Maggie bacon, egg, and cheese biscuits,” Charlie told me.

I was inwardly yelling, “YES!” Variety is the spice of life, no?

Maggie and I ate our delicious breakfasts and then I headed over to my father’s house after a quick shower.

“You’ve got that homeless look going on,” Old Fuss and Feathers said letting me in the back door. “I wish you would throw those pants away.”

“Alright Hyacinth,” I said with a chuckle.

You know we have to keep up appearances around here. How dare I don the homeless look. I call it casual. 

“You also forgot to shave,” Old Fuss and Feathers said admonishing me some more.

“I came over just wanting to see you and I get the third degree,” I told Old Fuss and Feathers.

He was living up to his namesake today. Harumppff! I don’t pay any attention to that stuff, though. There are much bigger fish to fry in my book than to squabble over such trifles. He was glad to see me just the same.  .

“Come Pick Up Your Supper,” Old Fuss and Feathers said.

The annual fall church barbecues have started back in earnest. Dad just called me and told me to come and pick up two plates. He had bought five no doubt giving two to Charlie and Janice as well. These were especially delicious. The chicken was really tangy and seasoned well. They come Maggie approved bless her dear soul. She ate about half the chicken and I ate the other half. 

Azaleas and Camellias Blooming Around the House…

Living in a Third World Municipality…

That’s the way dad likes to joke about it – that we are living in a third world city our power goes out so often. It reeks havoc on all our electronics. All my computers whirred to life about 6am this morning. I got in all their bios and set them to stay off after a power outage.

Well, my power went out last night right before midnight. The night before it was my father’s. I was just about to go to bed. The transformer at the end of the street just basically exploded. I heard a loud boom as the lights blinked out and I walked out into the yard with a flashlight. The transformer was putting on quite a show as it was arching and sparks were flying everywhere. Soon, several of my neighbors emerged from inside their homes to see what was going on as well.

I have electric/gas heat and luckily and also thankfully Charlie had well insulated all the walls of this house before I moved in. I woke this morning to the power being returned and the thermostat had only dipped down to 68° degrees – comfortable sleeping temperatures under a warm comforter. That heat sure felt good as I set it on 75° degrees and the house warmed back up, though.

Chili Dogs With Papa…

“I’ve made some chili and boiled some hot dogs,” Old Fuss and Feathers said tonight. “Come over and eat supper with me and we will watch an episode of Mars on the National Geographic AppleTV channel.”

I was cranking my car before my father could even hang up the phone. The chili dogs were absolutely delicious. I ate two and got chili all over my hands. It was the first hot and cooked meal I’ve had all week and I relished it. The dill pickles and sour cream and onion potato chips were just the accruements the doctor ordered.

“I swear you could make a dish rag taste good,” I told my father. ”Just like your mother could.”

He ate up the praise. You could see him smiling as I said it and he wiped down the kitchen counters after our meal.

I didn’t stay real long as I forgot my cigarettes and was jonesing badly about 45 minutes into the first episode. Damn things. I’ve got to quit them for good.

Power Outage = Suckage…

I was just finishing cleaning my last kennel with great satisfaction when Old Fuss and Feathers called me on the phone about noon.

“I need you!” he said frantically. “My power was out all night and now my television won’t come on. It gets stuck on the opening logo.”

“Unplug it for 20 minutes, then plug it back in,” I told my father to try. “I am about to get off and I will head that way.”

“My speakers on my computer quit working as well,” he added on top of the things I must fix.

“I can take care of that, too,” I replied. “I will see you in about an hour.”

I could just imagine my father crawling up the walls without his television to view. He is a true television addict.

I finally made it to my father’s house. He had resorted to listening to the radio on the little clock radio in the den. The din of National Public Radio was droning along in the background.

I unplugged the TV and sat down to wait 20 minutes giving the capacitors time to discharge. Dad and I both drank us a couple of ice cold diet Cokes and they were delicious – most satisfying Cokes I have ever had the pleasure to imbibe. The time had come for me to plug the TV back in and I waited another 5 minutes after that to hit the power button. My summation was that the capacitors would recharge and the television would come back on. I pressed the power button and the big 55 inch TV fired to life and cycled through the logo displaying CNN.

“Thank you so much, son,” dad said, fawning all over me. “You’re a genius with this kind of stuff. I was about to go crazy without my television.”

I then checked dad’s computer speakers and they had just somehow come unplugged. Most likely the cat was behind the computer desk and became entangled was my guess. I plugged them back into an audio port and we were back in business.

As Snug as a Bug in a Rug…

Mrs. Barbara called me at 7am this morning. I moaned as my cellphone rang on my bedside table. My bed was feeling like heaven. I looked to see who was calling and already knew what to expect.

“Tracy and I are going to be really late,” she said. “Could you go ahead and open the gate and get everything up and running?”

I didn’t have to be there until nine my time which was to my favor.

“Sure,” I sleepily replied as I wiped the sleep out of my eyes. “I just have to be at my father’s house at eleven.”

I set the alarm on my phone and slept another hour.

This was supposed to be my day off, but when a friend needs a hand, you have to lend it. Mrs. Barbara has been so nice, kind, and accommodating to me and my foibles.

I didn’t even take a shower. I just threw some clothes and a ballcap on and headed out the door. It is about a thirty minute drive for me. I unlocked the gate and opened it. Then I unlocked the building and turned all the lights on. The dogs were barking like crazy and I could hear a few meows as well. Everybody was glad we were back in business. I had to go in and greet all my canine friends and check on them. We are about at half capacity at the moment. I also checked Little Man’s long line of stiches for any signs of infection.

Mrs. Barbara showed up at 10am and Tracy was not far behind her. Tracy gave me a high five of comradery when she walked in the door.

“Have you had any visitors yet?” was the first thing Mrs. Barbara asked me when she walked in the door.

We had only been open for an hour.

“It has been quiet as a church mouse on that front,” I replied regretfully.

“Well, I am leaving it with y’all,” I told the duo. “I am going to head back to dad’s house.”

“Thank you so much, Andrew!” Mrs. Barbara told me. “It will not be forgotten.”

I told her, “Anytime!” with a warm smile and walked out the door. I had a date with Old Fuss and Feathers that would entail Cokes and conversation. Time for us to be together.

A Fast for Fast’s Sake…

The lowest I’ve ever spent on groceries is $46 dollars. The new low tonight was $41 big smackaroos. Nothing appealed to me and I just wasn’t hungry. I bought a mega pack of cinnamon applesauce which was my biggest expense at $6.99. I also bought two big bottles of cold brew coffee which is a morning treat as I sit in front of the computer. Sliced ham, mayonnaise, and fresh bread was also on the menu.

Old Fuss and Feathers looked into my cart and said, “You don’t seem to have enough and we are not making a return trip to the grocery store. You better go back and get some more.”

“I still have all those frozen meals from a few weeks ago in my freezer,” I replied to him reassuringly.

“Well, maybe this will help you with your diet,” he said in turn.

I still have most of the cheese and meat I bought last week as well. Those were put in the freezer. I had to put both loaves of bread from last week in the freezer as well. I just haven’t been hungry – mainly munching on cheese on wheat crackers and drinking water. Oh, I did get two Coke Zeros tonight which is my treat while I am writing this.

We were walking across Kroger’s parking lot when Old Fuss and Feathers asked if I was still riding my bicycle.

“I try to ride it every night until my heart rate really gets to going which usually means around the block a few times,” I replied.

“That will help your diet more than anything,” he said as we climbed into our cars. “I try to walk at least one mile a day for my heart.”

I Am Branching Out to Appliances…

Dad gave me his relatively new 46 inch Samsung television tonight.

“It you can fix it, then you can have it,” he told me.

Charlie was along for the ride in the white truck and helped us bring the surprisingly heavy television inside. I told ya the white truck brings great things.

“John, I bet he can get it working,” Charlie told my father.

I immediately took the back cover off the TV and immediately found the problem. It is the power PCB that supplies power to the backlights that light the picture on the television. I wrote down the part number and searched the internet and it is going to cost $85.00 to replace it. Dad said if the part was $100 dollars and less then I could order it.

I am just happy with glee that the part was so easily obtainable and was for order. I whipped out my debit card and soon the order was processed. It is going to take about a week to get here according to the shipping information.

This will be the nicest television I have ever owned. I just hope I can put it all back together again. It is going to be squirrelly getting the speakers back in place and aligned with the back cover.

October 24 Tablet Scribblings–Tearful Goodbyes…

A neatly dressed couple came in this morning with a little brindle Boston Terrier. They were standing in the lobby as I walked in from the kennels. The dog was thankfully tethered to a leash.

“We can’t keep him anymore,” the male counterpart told Mrs. Barbara. “He’s tearing up and chewing on all the furniture.”

“I paid $300 dollars for that dog!” the wife snapped at the husband mournfully.

“If he is experiencing separation anxiety, then you can leave the TV running or have music playing,” I told the fella hoping for a better outcome.

Boston’s have always seemed like high maintenance dogs to me. We rarely get them at the Humane Society, though. When we do get them they don’t stick around too long.

The wife was sniffling and blowing her nose with Kleenex at this point in the matter.

“Do y’all have room for him?” the man asked clearly ready to get rid of this dog.

“Take him on back to the kennels, Andrew,” Mrs. Barbara told me.

I grabbed the leash and the dog followed me to the door.

The wife burst out crying at this point. It was clearly her dog in this matter. I wonder if this dog is going to be a serial returner which we get such a dog from time to time. Especially if he’s got a hankering for tearing up couches and couch cushions.

A Double Edged Sword…

These new anxiety meds are kicking my ass to put it bluntly. Yes, they have helped with the anxiety immensely, but I am too sleepy all the time to enjoy it.

I got home from volunteering yesterday, took my noon dose, and laid down for a nap and didn’t wake up until 7pm. I then took my nightly dose and fell back asleep and didn’t wake up until noon today. I am tempted to try and not take them today and see what happens. I don’t want to sleep away my life. I am just scared of the anxiety monster.

“Give them time,” Old Fuss and Feathers warily and gently said over the phone a moment ago. “You will probably get over the initial sleepiness.”

“I’ll try,” I said not very hopeful.  

I dare say I hope so. If I take my noon dose, I bet I will sleep until late in the evening. This happens with a lot of psychiatric medications. The side effects can be worse than what you are trying to cure.

October 22 Tablet Scribblings…

Little Man continues to get better and better. I am having to give him an antibiotic and he doesn’t fuss when I shove it down his throat. Boy, that dog can eat some kibble. I think the antibiotics make him so hungry. I want to adopt this dog so badly, but I know it would never happen. Old Fuss and Feathers would make me take him back for sure. I was talking to Barbara about it today.

“You can take him home after his stiches come out,” she told me eager to find him a home.

“I will be having to pay all the Vet bills,” I can hear my father say. “Dogs and cats are expensive if you treat them properly.”

I took my medications early today at 11:20am needing a respite from a busy morning. I usually always take them at noon like clockwork. Tracy noticed me going into the bathroom early and remarked that I had to poop early today.

“TRACY!!!” I hollered loudly, playfully admonishing her. “Don’t keep up with my poops!”

I told you she was a busybody. She just laughed and said I was usually the most regular person she had ever met. She doesn’t know I am taking medications – my crazy meds as I like to coyly call them.

Hell Night Doth Endeth…

And a new day dawns…

It was 1am when I turned off my tablet and headed to bed. I fell asleep soon after hitting the hay and then Maggie got to barking loudly as if someone was in the yard. She has different barks for different situations. I got up and turned on all the outside lights and Maggie calmed back down and fell asleep on the couch. I climbed back into the bed about 4am. It seemed I had just gone back to sleep when there was a knock on the door. It was 8am.

“I am so sorry I am so early again,” Charlie said.

“Well, I would rather you be early than not to come at all,” I replied.

Charlie really appreciated that and told me so. He was in a hurry and was soon back on the road again. Maggie and I ate our breakfast and I tried to fall back asleep again, but once I am up there is no turning back. I got on the computer and started my day.

Bored, Depressed, and Lonely Tonight…

Just having one of those bad nights I have from time to time. I called my father and he is all the way up in Alexander City visiting with my sister’s family. He wanted to see his grandkids. He should be headed home about now as it is just after 10pm. He wasn’t much company over the phone. I pray he didn’t show up at my sister’s house still buzzed from the ballgame bar scene.

I guess it is normal to feel this way. Especially the lonely part. I wish I had some kind of counterpart with me to keep me company. I am so desperate I am having thoughts of Tuleana tonight. She called me this morning and said she would call me again tonight. I also think the depression has a lot to do with SAD. Seasonal Affective Disorder. It is getting dark just after 7pm here and it depresses me. I seem to live in the dark ages at nights.

This is when the alcohol monster rears its ugly head. I want to drive down to the package store in West Point and nurse a pint of Southern Comfort or some such liquor. I know it is self medicating my problems, but I would feel instantly better. Is it that bad of a thing? Just thinking “aloud” here.

Later After Midnight…

I remembered my Auschwitz Mantra suddenly and immediately got to feeling better. My life looked kind of rosy after all. I’ve got so much to be thankful for!!!

The Irish Pub Downtown Was Not Such a Good Idea…

File this in the “DUH!” department.

Old Fuss and Feathers called me at noon and asked me if I wanted to go to the pub just downtown to watch the Auburn game.

“Sure,” I said, happy to be included. “Let me take a shower and put on some decent clothes.”

I drove over to my father’s house and we headed just down the road to the pub. The bartender asked me what I wanted and I almost said Guinness out of a long deep seated habit. They had Guinness on tap.

“A large Coca-Cola will suit me just fine,” I replied after a hesitation.

“Driving, eh?” he said with a smile as he wiped clean the counter in front of me and put down a drink coaster. .

Dad ordered a large white wine promising me that was all he was going to have.

Being around all those drinking people was not such a good idea for me. The bar was also loud and boisterous. I told dad I was just going to walk back to his house and drive home. The walk only took 20 minutes.

“I am so sorry, son,” he replied. “I just wasn’t thinking.”

“We both weren’t thinking,” I told him as I said goodbye. “I should know better than any.”

Well, Auburn won big. An SEC game on the road. I know he is still down there celebrating with all the other revelers. Let’s pray he walks home and doesn’t drive. We can get his car in the morning.

What Does Polly Have that I Don’t Have?

Polly has hundreds of fascinating knick knacks and I just have a boring computer and computer parts in every room. That’s what. Charlie called me and said they were visiting with his sister, Polly, tonight. She has a collection of knick knacks that Horsefly is just enamored with.

“He has a few special ones he loves to fondle.” Charlie told me chuckling. “He also loves snow globes which Polly has a few.”

“Just a few,” Charlie added facetiously.

“Well, I was looking forward to seeing you guys tonight,” I replied.

“Horsefly bowled two perfect games tonight,” Charlie went on to tell me. “He was ecstatic. We’re having a good night tonight and I hope it stays that way.”

Polly, Charlie’s sister, lives a block over from me and I kept hoping they would swing by here as well. Alas, Horsefly must be ready for home and I know Charlie wants to go home as well.

Charlie has to take Horsefly to the cinema tomorrow. I offered to take him, but Charlie told me the Fly has been fussy about others taking him to the movies. Maybe its because I go to his movie and try to sit too close to him. If you get too close, he will gather his popcorn and coke and get up and move. Snubbed by the Fly.  

October 19 Tablet Scribblings…

Well, dad called our doctor and he put me on a new anxiety medication. The Klonopin just wasn’t doing the trick. I have to take it three times a day. I am going to pick up the pills on my way back from the Humane Society today as the prescription is filled and ready to go.

“Maybe this will give you some peace,” my father told me of my tortured soul.

I am excited to try them and to see if they help. I think I am the only person on Earth thrilled at getting even more crazy meds.

I was stir crazy late in the evening last night and visited with my father to calm down. I called it grounding myself. He cooked us breakfast for supper and it was such a treat. I adore and love breakfast for supper. We had scrambled eggs, bacon, and heat and serve biscuits.

Tracey got the wildcat to eat out of her hand and she was thrilled today. Normally, he would hiss and cower in the back of his cage. This cat is going to take some serious rehabilitation if it is going to be adopted. Tracy is up to the task, though. She oozes with sweetness and trustworthiness,

Little Man got back from the Vet this morning as well and he looks like a new dog without that hideous tumor on his loin. The tumor was benign. I peeled back the bandages and he has quite a few stiches. I have a mind to adopt this dog if Old Fuss and Feathers wouldn’t have a hissy fit. I might just do it anyway come hell or high water.

Edie Brickell - In The Bath

Dearest Maggie, I Am So Sorry!

Maggie woke me up at seven sitting in the doorway to my bedroom and barking loudly. She was trying to rouse me from sleep. Then she started to make those mewling noises I know all too well. Her dog door was locked. It had been locked since the meter reader came yesterday. I have this mental block when it concerns her locked dog door for some reason.

“Come on, girl,” I said sleepily. “Let’s let you out for a potty break.”

Maggie’s such a good dog and will hold it with the best of them. I opened the dog door and Maggie shot out of it like a bullet. She really had to go something fierce. I know she had to be terribly uncomfortable. I feel like such a schmuck.

Sticks and Clothes Hangers? What’s This?

Charlie and Horsefly stopped by again for a short visit last night. Horsefly had a wire clothes hanger and was transfixed as he waved it in front of his chest mesmerized by the motion it made.

“What’s this?” I asked Charlie clandestinely.

“He was doing it with sticks he found in the yard and I guess he moved up in the world getting a clothes hanger,” Charlie replied with a chuckle.

Horsefly continued to pace around the house as he briskly waved that clothes hanger in front of him.

From the Annals of Volunteering…

Animal control brought us problems today – problems for us to fix and solve. First, was the wildcat. The lady officer took a hook and loop and grabbed a cat out of the back of the officer’s truck. The cat was just wild. It went just flailing about and shrilly screaming as she carried it inside to a empty cage in the cat room.

“She’s hurting it!” Tracy screeched, covering her eyes.

Next, was a sweet, small dog with a huge hideous looking tumor on its right rear quarter. The dog was amiable and seemed fine. I felt of the tumor as I carried him back to a kennel. He didn’t yelp or seem in pain. The dog was just completely famished and glad to get a big bowl of kibble and something to drink. I got down on my haunches and petted him as he ate and drank.

“We’re going to get you fixed up little buddy,” I told him.

“We are going to have to get that tumor taken off if anybody is going to adopt him,” Mrs. Barbara told me as I emerged from the kennels.

“He doesn’t seem to be in pain. It just looks really nasty,” I replied.

“I’ll take him to the Vet in the morning,” Barbara said.

It’s That Time of the Month and We Are Not Talking About Women’s Issues…

I saw him first. The meter reader that is. He was about a block over and heading our way. Maggie’s proximity alarm had already gone off probably due to the neighborhood dogs barking maniacally. She was already barking up a storm. I was just pulling in the driveway from the Humane Society. I quickly ran inside and locked the dog door before Maggie could escape to the backyard. I was then treated to an hour of vicious barking.

Greetings Humble Visitors!

I heard a very loud knock on the glass of my door tonight and looked out the window. It was Charlie and Horsefly. I was itching for some company so this just suited me fine.

“What are you two up to?” I asked answering the door.

“Horsefly wanted to visit with you tonight,” Charlie said. “He even wanted to see Maggie.”

“Well, y’all come on inside and make yourselves at home.”

Horsefly proceeded to check every light in the house – flicking the switch on then off. He even got fixated with the antique lamp on my computer desk in the den. Horsefly was also soaking wet from sweat after bowling five games. He had a towel draped around his neck. Charlie tried to clean him up some more not to much avail.

“Did he bowl lots of strikes and spares tonight?” I asked Charlie and Horsefly echoed my words.

“Yes, thankfully dear god!” Charlie replied laughing. “The Fly gets mighty upset when he starts bowling gutter balls.”

“What happens when you start to bowl gutter balls Mr. Charlie?” Horsefly asked.

“Bad things,” Charlie replied. “Let’s not talk about it.”

As soon as they arrived, then Horsefly was ready to go. Charlie smiled as Horsefly said goodbye to Maggie and I. Maggie finds Horsefly fascinating and will follow him around the house.

“This may become regular,” Charlie told me. “Are you okay with that?”

“I would welcome the company,” I replied heartfeltly. “I don’t go to bed until eleven.”

“Maybe we will stay longer next time,” Charlie said.

Horsefly once again said goodbye and Charlie and him drove off to other avenues and what fancied Horsefly’s mind.

Oh Dear!

Rebecca called in sick this morning and I got a nurse name Tara who had only performed my shot once before. I am afraid she botched the whole deal. I had to walk her through preparing the injection and she still got it wrong. If I go bonkers in the next week then you know why. I didn’t tell my father once I arrived back at the pharmacy as it would just worry him. I didn't feel the injection at all which makes me conclude I didn’t get the injection. I always feel a sting or pressure in my buttock as the fluid is injected. I don’t think Tara realized the gravity of the situation or how important the injection is to my sanity. There is no other recourse than to wait it out for two more weeks. Medicare Part D will only pay for one injection for every two weeks as prescribed.

I Make a Mean Sammich…

We seem to be back on track as far as our grocery buying schedule is concerned. Monday night it is! I still had a lot of food left from last week so this allowed me to buy things I normally couldn’t afford like a two pack of large Jif peanut butter jars. Those were $11 dollars. I think my total was around $75 dollars tonight.

I lost two pounds last week so I continued with the trend of what I ate last week. Sandwiches aren’t a binge food for me as it takes care and time to make them. I got smoked provolone, garlic and herb jack, baby swiss, and tomato and herb jack cheeses tonight. I also got two pounds of sliced Boar’s Head roasted turkey from the deli. That stuff was expensive!!! I rounded it all out with two loaves of the rich and yeasty Artisan bakery bread I have become enamored with. Dad asked me tonight that he had noticed I was buying that now and how it tasted.

“Softest and freshest bread I have tasted on the bread aisle,” I told him.

I have been searching for such a bread for months nay years now.

My big splurge item besides the sliced turkey was a big bottle of Califia iced mocha coffee.

For my one sweet item, I bought a bunch of bananas instead of 4 bags of powdered Hostess donuts. Hey, I am trying.

Old Fuss and Feathers did his shopping while I shopped as well. He returned from putting his groceries in his car just as I was ready to check out. We were perfectly choreographed tonight.

We both gawked as we walked to our cars. The police had someone pulled over in the parking lot.

“Glad that’s not me!” Old Fuss and Feathers loudly said.

“Such a terrible feeling,” I replied as I shook my head.

I paid careful heed to the speed limits on the drive home. The police were out in force this evening. There was no lack of flies for their fly traps tonight it seemed as I saw another car pulled over down highway 29.  I know this sounds cynical, but they probably had a quota and needed the revenue.

Sharyn…

I, too, would love that elusive adult best friend. Tracy is as close as I come to having a buddy right now. We’re close comrades and she says she finds me fascinating for whatever that’s worth. Instead, I have Tuleana calling me every night hoping I will take her under my wing. I am not disparaging her, but Tuleana’s IQ is like 70 (the mind of a child) and we would not make a good match. She is also prone to fits of insanity and we are all stocked up on crazy around here to coin an often used phrase.

Charlie and dad have been best friends since I was a very little boy. Dad was working at Greene’s Super Drugs before he bought his own pharmacy and Charlie was trying to figure out what was wrong with Horsefly. He would come in and talk to my father about it and get prescriptions filled.

“He’s autistic!” my father told him one day and they formed an instant friendship.

Dad sent him to a doctor and they started to try different medications to ease the symptoms. Charlie was just elated to finally have a word for the condition of his youngest son.

Dad often takes Horsefly bowling to give Charlie a break. For the longest time, I was taking him to the movies on Saturday. We all pitch in to take the load off Charlie. Janice is retired from working at a school for the mentally handicapped. Horsefly sleeps all day so she doesn’t see him until night when Charlie gets home. For some odd reason, she has never been active in what we call Horsefly’s “rounds”. That's always mystified me. She does give Horsefly a bath when he gets up at night, though.

Charlie attributes it to me for Horsefly learning to play like a child and talk. Dad would tell me not to be so rough with the Fly and Charlie would rebuke my father and tell him to let me play. Charlie does a lot for me for exactly this reason. He says I brought Horsefly out of his shell. They thought he was going to be an automaton for the rest of his life.

Horsefly always had the neatest toys and my brother and I loved to come over and play with them. Horsefly would play with them in turn. Something he had never done beforehand. Charlie would stand in the door and smile with marvel.

So? What are we going to do about that elusive adult friend? Do you have to be in the right place and meet the right person? I want to know as well. George of George and the gang fame was my big buddy, but I lost him to alcoholism and prison. George wasn’t exactly a good influence on me as well. We would often be shitfaced before mid afternoon having started drinking early in the day.

Make Haste! Make Haste! For There Are Others to Feed…

I made it easy on Charlie and Old Fuss and Feathers tonight. I ordered a 3 piece box of KFC. They didn’t have to drive down and pick up pizzas. I got two breasts and a wing so Maggie got one breast and is a very happy and satiated dog. I carefully picked the meat off the bones as usual. No bones for Maggie!

Dad got to playing the piano once they arrived. Charlie was emptying the trash and getting Maggie a fresh bowl of water.

“Come on!” Charlie said. “We’ve got to go! Horsefly is waiting on his chicken fingers!”

“Let me finish this hymn,” Old Fuss and Feathers said as he continued to play.

He was playing Tell Me the Story of Jesus.

“Goddammit, John! We’ve got to go!” Charlie barked at my father one more time.

Dad finally relinquished control of the piano and they were gone just like that. The house was quiet again with just the whir of my computers to keep me company. Maggie is like a ghost when all is well. She will sneak out of a room and return without you knowing it. She’s full and sleepy and laying on the computer room rug as I’ve started to play some chillstep/future garage music on YouTube.

DAD!!! CHARLIE IS COMING TOO EARLY!

Can you really complain having breakfast delivered to your door every Sunday? Sheesh, Charlie was here at eight this morning, though. Maggie woke me up loudly whining and barking at his arrival. Not much is going to escape Maggie’s proximity alarm. She is especially attuned to car doors shutting.

Once I am up, then there is no going back to bed for me. I can probably take a nap this afternoon fortunately. I knew I shouldn’t have stayed up so late playing computer games. I feel zonked and bleary eyed.

“Here’s your biscuits,” Charlie said hurriedly forcing them into my hand.

Then he handed me an extra large diet Coke. It was a frenzy of activity. Charlie was a man on a mission this morning.

“I don’t mean to wake you up so early, but Horsefly is ready for bed,” Charlie told me apologizing. “He dictates the schedule.”

I told Charlie thanks and good luck at getting my father up this time of the morning. Charlie had him a sausage biscuit and his coveted senior coffee.

“I’ll honk the horn till he comes to the door,” Charlie said and he was off in a flash.

I went ahead and called my father on the house phone which its rings can wake the dead warning him that Charlie was on the way.

“Good morning and shit!” is all he sleepily said when I told him what was going on and he got off the phone.

GULP!

Auburn lost badly yet once again to Tennessee this time and it is Pittsville over at my father’s house from Charlie’s account.

“Should I even go over there?” Charlie asked me over the phone earlier. “It is just a damn football game.”

“I’d go!” I told Charlie. “He’s probably used to losing about now.”

Charlie laughed and chuckled at my remark.

I’ve tried calling him several times, but Old Fuss and Feathers is not answering his phone. I just wanted to make sure he got home okay. All this fuss over nothing. Then I remember that football is my father’s religion. What if your god forsake you?

Careful You Must Be Young Padawan…

When it concerns my medications that is. Dad and Charlie just stopped by for a short visit and dad wanted to see my medications. I wasn’t expecting them at all. I already had my pajamas on and was dozing off in my recliner. One light was on in the room and the TV was off. Maggie was on the couch in her usual sleeping arrangements.

“It is after nine and you haven’t taken your nightly dose!” he sternly told me.

Maggie was barking so loudly I could barely hear my father talk. She was just so happy to see them.

“I was just about to take them before you two arrived tonight,” I said scrambling to save face.

“Are you having trouble remembering to take you medications?” Old Fuss and Feathers asked.

“No, not at all,” I replied explicitly. “You just caught me at the wrong moment.”

“Well, I trust you,” Old Fuss and Feathers told me as he studied my dose pack for any missed dosages.

I fearfully thought for a moment there he was going to try and take back my medications, and start making me take them all at night again.

“John, show some faith in him,” Charlie told my father as they were leaving. “He is doing better than he ever has.”

Charlie made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Thank you, Charlie, for that voice of support!

Prickling With Pretense…

“Did you ever go to college?” Tracy asked me chirpily as we sat outside on this beautiful Friday.

Our chores were complete and we brought our lawn chairs outside to enjoy the sunshine on this cool and refreshing day. We were hoping some people would show up wanting to adopt some animals.

“I was a music major in college,” I replied. “I attended the University of Montevallo.”

“You sing? Really?” Tracy asked with an astonished look on her face.

“I used to,” I quickly added before Tracy could harangue me into belting out a tune.

Tracy is currently in college to be a veterinary technician so she says. She is doing quite well from the way she talks taking night courses out at the local community college.

“I learn something new and interesting about you every day,” she told me very happily.

“I am still broken up with Michael,” she announced to the both of us. “Kicked him to the curb I did.”

“I will believe it when it has been a few weeks!” I exclaimed.

Mrs. Barbara said, “hear! hear!” echoing my thoughts.

Mrs. Barbara barely fits into her lawn chair. She is rather rotund.

“Her lawn chair is going to break any moment,” Tracy whispered to me and we both snickered.

“Hey, what are you two whispering about?” Mrs. Barbara asked. 

“Oh nothing,” Tracy said as she shrugged her shoulders.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again that Tracy is a busybody. She will tend to your business if you let her. She is also a supreme extrovert which can clash with my extreme introversion. . 

I Can’t Go For That–No Can Do!

Let me preface this by saying I have a soft heart for people in need after all I have been through in my life. Tuleana called me tonight and wanted me to take them out for pizza and Pepsi this weekend as a treat. Richard lost another job again and they are living on her disability allotment.

“I'll think about it,” is what I told her and we got off the phone.

Fore mostly, I wouldn’t have the gall to impose on a friend in such a way.

“There is a reason they don’t have a car,” my father’s omnipresent words echoed in my mind.

Then I got really paranoid and thought they were going to kill me for my car. I know it’s irrational, but it is just the way schizophrenic people think at times. I am just getting bad vibes from them.

I called my father and asked him for his advice and told him of my paranoia.

“You start that up again and they are going to take you to the bank and you are too softhearted to say no,” my father replied. “You don’t have the money to be treating them to pizza and soda.”

Dad talked about 20 minutes about what I should and shouldn’t do. He was right for the most part.

“Do you want to give up your monthly $100 in computer money?” he asked. “You would have to cease that to treat them like they want you to treat them.”

I replied no.

“Think with your head and not your heart on this venture,” he then said and we got off the phone.

Current Weather Map…

That cold front is about to pass us by and will push tropical storm Michael out into the ocean again. After the cold front, it should get really gusty around here and temperatures should drop throughout the day.

Post Hurricane…

I just took a ride through town. There are tree limbs down and debris everywhere, but no downed trees. We, thankfully, escaped any major damage. We received 4.71 inches of rain. I checked the river house and the river is very high, but not flood stage. Thank the maker our power didn’t go out. A computer junkie like me would feel lost. Sharyn, the storm went up the coast so I think you got what was a cold front moving through. It would cause rain and storms. It should be noticeably cooler today and tonight.

Michael Jackson - Rock With You (Official Video)

7:00pm Update…

It is really gusty with torrential rain at the moment. It has pretty much rained heavily since I got home from the Humane Society. We still have power obviously. I wouldn’t be surprised if we get 4 or 5 inches of rain out of this storm.

Michael Jackson - Don’t Stop 'Til You Get Enough (Official Video)

Gotsta Get Out of Here…

The first outer bands of Hurricane Michael were among us. I was in a hurry to finish my chores and head home today. A steady rain had already began to fall.

“Don’t go,” Tracy pleaded with me. “Barbara is a bore. All she talks about is her kids and grandkids.”

I chuckled.

“I just want to get home before the shit hits the fan,” I replied.

I bid farewell to everybody and headed to Daniel’s to get some of their crispy well done burgers. I then made a beeline straight to home.

On a positive note, this storm will usher in fall weather. It is supposed to get down to 49° degrees tomorrow night. It looks like ninety degree days are gone until next spring.

Line Worker? Please Climb My Power Pole…

They’ve changed the map. We are now under possible instead of most likely. I do pray the power doesn’t go out. We’re right on the edge, though. At least we are on the western side of the storm and that means less high winds and less damage.

Within the Sphere of Influence…

Glittermom wrote if I was ready for Michael. The worst of the storm should hit us Wednesday night. In all probabilities, my power will be out for 3 to 4 days. We are going to be on the edge of hurricane force winds if the forecast pans out. I am already morose and dreading it. Gotta get me a good dose of computer gaming in the next two days before all hell hits. My tablet is fully charged containing several movies and TV shows I like to watch. I have plenty of medications, non perishable food and water. I also have a full tank of gas in my car. All three of my flashlights have fresh batteries. I guess I am as ready as I am ever going to be.

It looks ominous folks!

Comment Reply…

Sharyn Bellah said...

Do you find that your habit of doing things late affects your mental curiosities? After about 3pm, my anxiety really sets in and I'm a home body! Add night blindness and a new fear of driving (Since that last lady tried to kill us) and there's no going out for me!

Andrew Replies…

Sharyn, tell me about it. YES! Yes, it does affect my mental curiosities as you put it. I would fare far better doing this all around lunch about the time I take my main dosage of medications. I can’t see to drive well after dark either. Dad insists on going so late so he won’t get “caught” by people he knows and get entangled in lengthy conversations as is often the case when he goes in the day. It must be a small town thing. “Why don’t you talk while I shop,” is what I want to tell him. “Then you can use me as an excuse that you’ve gotta go when I show back up with a cart of groceries ready to check out.”

Shaddup and Eat a Sammich…

It is sammich time!!! It was a sandwich themed night tonight grocery shopping. I should say dream sandwich night. I got all kinds of expensive fancy breads, meats and cheeses, but I didn’t overspend. My total was $71 dollars. Well shy of my $85 dollar limit

“I’ve got some tomatoes at home that would go great with all those sandwich fixings,” my father told as we were checking out. “I got them at the farmer’s market. I will give some to you Wednesday.”

Old Fuss and Feathers has to work 10 hours tomorrow and I don’t envy him of that. I would, one day, like to be a fly on the wall and just see what he does all day. All the staff just loves and adores him at the pharmacy.

I also got eight cans of Kroger brand Vienna sausages for the Magster aka the bottomless pit tonight. She is just going to be thrilled. I got a thrift pack of potted meat for me and some saltine crackers. You traditionally have to have some mystery meat in your diet if you live in the South.

Gotta try some of this the next time I am in Kroger. Barbecue flavored potted meat. I bet it will be sweet instead of tangy and I won’t like it.

Well, let me take my nightly meds and settle down for the evening. I am going to get in my comfy recliner with my tablet until these meds hit me and it is time for bed.

On the Right Track…

“Let’s get back on track,” my father said over the phone tonight concerning groceries.

Traditionally, I would always go on Monday nights, but my father and I have a habit of procrastinating.  It’s one of the more unpleasant things I inherited from him.

“I’ve got plenty of groceries, but this will get me way ahead of the game,” I told him. “I’m ready to go if you are.”

I had thoughts of expensive Mrs. Grissom’s pimento cheese and chicken salad on my mind. I also want some Reese’s peanut butter cups since all the candy is on sale for Halloween. Third on my mind was sliced cheese for sandwiches which is always too expensive on a normal grocery store run.

“We will wait until about nine,” Old Fuss and Feathers said. “I will call you when it is time to head out and I will meet you there.”

“Sounds good to me,” I said and then we got off the phone.

The Countdown Begins…

A moment ago it was 7pm. That should be the time Charlie and Old Fuss and Feathers leave to gather all our suppers. It is 7:20pm now and I just told Maggie they are coming. She immediately got to whining. I am committed to the process now. Once again, I will be getting two large pizzas for $10-$12 bucks. I think the Hot-N-Ready pizzas went up a dollar. Let’s hope they don’t arrive at 9pm.

I haven’t done much today except play computer games and rest. I did straighten up the house for Charlie’s and my father’s arrival. That always sends Maggie scurrying out the dog door. She is so skittish and also hates for her living environment to be changed. If I even reach for the broom, then Maggie is out of here. 

Creatures of the Night…

Charlie woke me up at 8am with breakfast this morning. I never know when he will get here. I was abruptly woken by a loud knock on the door and I sleepily opened the front door in my underwear and a t-shirt as Charlie handed me the goods. Maggie was going strong, though – so glad to see him. She was proud to get her sausage biscuit.

“Horsefly was ready for bed and I had to hurry,” Charlie told me.

Horsefly sleeps in the day and doesn’t venture forth until after nightfall. 

“Enjoy your biscuits,” Charlie said and he was gone in a flash.

I bet Charlie didn’t dare wake my father that early. I just arrived home from my father’s house and noticed he had fixed a strong pot of coffee – the house smelling wonderfully of roasted coffee beans. Boy, was he surly this morning. Auburn lost really badly last night – got the pants beat off of them by an unranked Mississippi State.

“We just won’t talk about it,” he told me when I sat down in the den meaning the Auburn game. 

“Looks like we may be getting a hurricane,” dad then said changing the subject.

“Today will be the last 90° degree day and then the daily temperatures fall progressively,” I told him. “I do think fall is on the way.”

Old Fuss and Feathers still rations out my cigarettes to me. I had to ask for an extra pack this morning as I had gotten behind. I normally only smoke one pack a day. He didn’t balk which I feared.

“I might smoke me a few today, too!” he jokingly told me and I laughed.

Cigarettes are prohibitively expensive these days and my father never complains about the cost. He’s good to me about that vice.

As the Field Goes…

“You sure you don’t want to come over and watch the Auburn game with me?” my father asked me this afternoon.

I don’t have a subscription to ESPN or the SEC network with my basic, basic cable.

“I am just going to stay home with Maggie,” I replied. “I can keep up with the game on the ESPN scoreboard with my computer.”

I didn’t think my nerves could take how loud my father will turn up the volume on the television.

“Oh, come on!” Old Fuss and Feathers protested.

I went and lasted 15 or 20 minutes. Old Fuss and Feathers was drinking wine and I began to scheme on how I could get some, too! lol  That, and my constant need for a cigarette break would get on his nerves for sure.

I had it all planned out. I had a corkscrew in my pocket and I would feign sugary soda from the downstairs basement fridge. There are quite a few bottles of wine in that fridge. I would uncork a bottle of wine and guzzle it down and then bury the bottle in the trash or throw the empty bottle into the dirt, dimly lit, and seldom visited portion of the basement. It’s devious I know, but that’s just how some alcoholics think. So, I headed on home with my tail between my legs, defeated and out of harm’s way. Man, I wanted a drink tonight something fierce.

For Summer…

Dad says he just does it by taste. You add a little lemon juice to a half cup of mayonnaise until it is tasty. Don’t overdo it or the sauce will be runny. It should turn out creamy with a lemony bite to the sauce. He will often garnish it with sliced hard boiled eggs to finish the recipe.

Life’s Little Victories…

My father really was orchestral in getting all this done. To him goes the glory. I just called him and thanked him for all his efforts today and the previous days beforehand.

Last night, I arrived home from grocery shopping to find Charlie parked out in front of my house. He has a key and had let himself inside. He was busy cleaning house – vacuuming the rug in my computer room. He stopped and helped me unload my groceries as my father then arrived.

“What are you doing here?” I asked Charlie inquisitively as he was then cleaning my bathroom sink. “I know you didn’t just come to clean.”

I was very glad to see him and so was the Magster. Thrilled would be a better term for the Magster.

“I am going to cut your hair again so you look good for the doctor,” Charlie said.

This was no doubt my father’s machinations. Old Fuss and Feathers parked himself on the couch with Maggie as Forensic Files droned on while Charlie cut and washed my hair. He gave me quite a nice haircut I might add. Old Fuss and Feathers said I looked like a new man. The deep shampoo and scalp massage was luxurious.

They soon left and Maggie and I settled down for the night. In the morning was my doctor’s appointment and I was as ready as I ever was going to be. Dad picked me up at 9:20am the next day and we headed down the interstate for a 10am appointment.

“I’m increasing your Risperdal 1 and half milligrams,” the doctor told me when I described the problems I had earlier in the week. “I will see you back in two weeks and let’s see how you are doing.”

So that makes 3 milligrams a day I am taking now on top of the 50mg I am getting with my long lasting injection every two weeks. My math is terrible, but I think that works out to be over 6mg a day. I thanked the doctor and dad and I left feeling something positive happened. Dad was worried he was going to take me off Risperdal and put me on another antipsychotic and all the teething pains that would result. Much of psychiatry is trial and error. In the beginning of my mental problems, I probably went through six drugs before they found one that worked.

Now, it was time for my and Maggie’s treat. We stopped at Hardee’s for sausage biscuits and steak biscuits. The biscuits are really stupendous at Hardee’s. Dad and I parked and ate our biscuits and I saved one for Maggie who relished it once I arrived home. It was still good and warm. She really was one happy dog. She hadn’t had a steak biscuit from Hardee’s in six months and neither had I.

We’re On a Roll…

Going to get groceries at 8:30pm. I felt up to it and just called my father.

“Sure,” he said. “I will be up there at 8:45pm”

“It will only take you ten minutes,” I replied. “I will be waiting on you to get there with my cart up front.”

We Spoke of Better Days and Better Nights and They Have Come…

Having a much better day today. I escaped Walmart once again. I found a pair of blue jeans buried in my closet that fit me and my father found them acceptable. I don’t know why I have to dress up for the doctor, but I do. I guess it is old Fuss and Feathers keeping up appearances.

Some switch in my brain was flicked overnight and it has been smooth sailing today. I’m lucid and alert. No panic attacks whatsoever to speak of. I just called my father and asked him if I could go put gas in my car (a good sign) and he told me he would call me back when he gets home.

“Act normal tomorrow,” my father told me this afternoon. “Because you don’t want to go into the hospital.”

“I’m fine today,” I told him. “I am feeling fit as a fiddle.”

“Let’s hope it holds true for tomorrow,” my father answered rather morosely and not very encouragingly.

30 Minutes Later…

“I’m down here at the Circle K,” dad said over his phone. “Drive down and we will fill up your car.”

It cost me $27 dollars to fill my car up and I was on dead empty. My Civic is much more frugal with gas than my CR-V was.

“Let’s go get you some treats – something to eat and drink,” my father then said supervisory. “Don’t look at the beer.”

I had told him early this morning I had cravings for Schlitz malt liquor or Colt 45 today. Malt liquor is sweeter than beer and brewed differently. It will knock your pants off as well.

I felt like a kid in a candy store. I got some red hot sausages, a big bag of fried pork skins, and a cherry Coke. I made the mistake of giving Maggie a few pork skins when I got home and now she is wild for more. I’ve created a monster.

Tales of Woe: No Circle K, No Kroger, No Walmart Tonight…

I just had a extremely massive panic attack and it was dispelled by the simple words, “We don’t have to go tonight.” Old Fuss and Feathers was really nice tonight and told me just to calm down and relax. The whole thing seemed insurmountable. I needed gas for my car, groceries for my pantry, and some nice clothes to wear to the doctor on Friday. On shaky ground I am. Old Fuss and Feathers insists on going so late so he won’t get “caught” by someone he knows.

“We will just go sometime during the day tomorrow,” my father told me. “You just calm down and get to feeling better.”

I thanked him profusely for being so nice about the affair. Usually he would try and manhandle me through the process of going to these stores. It was almost like someone gave me a couple of valium when he told me we didn’t have to go tonight. It immediately defused that ticking timebomb that can be my addled brain.

Meanwhile, As We Volunteer: Love Lost…

Tracy broke up with her long-term boyfriend yesterday. She didn’t seem like herself all morning – her usual chipper self. He had been meeting women on Match.com behind her back. I tried to console her the best I could.

“Time heals wounds,” I told her. “I know this very well. Maybe it’s the ethos’s way of getting you a better boyfriend.”

“We fought all the time at the end anyway,” Tracy told me. “We were always at odds with each other. It still hurts so damn badly, though.”

Let’s Ditch Megaton and Head Out of Town...

The Sweat Shop…

“I am way so over dressed,” I told Rebecca this morning embarrassingly. “My house was freezing cold this morning so I put on a hoodie only to be met with a hot and humid Southern morning when I walked out the door. I was already running late so I didn’t have time to change.”

“Well,” Rebecca replied. “A lady at my daughter’s soccer practice yesterday was wearing a sweat suit in 90 degree weather. It must be something in the water.”

We both laughed and laughed. It was so good to see her this morning on this our mission of mercy for me. Rebecca gave me my injection and Dee Dee greeted me in the front office.

“What about our Tigers, Andrew?” she asked.

Dee Dee has always been under the delusion I am some wild, rabid Auburn fan. It doesn’t help that half of my apparel is Auburn related like what I wore this morning. Of course, I can talk the talk and walk the walk.

“We don’t seem to have that high powered offense we are so used to,” I replied. “Our offense seems flat and uninspired.”

“We need to get better as some tough games are headed our way,” she said worriedly.

I agreed and bid them all farewell and headed to the pharmacy after obtaining my next appointment card which Dee Dee dutifully filled out.

“Samantha left you a gift on the chair on the porch,” my father told me without fanfare sitting behind the pharmacy counter. “I put them in a Ziploc bag.”

Samantha is my father’s cat.

I left the drugstore wondering just what did Samantha leave me as I headed to my father’s house. Well, dad had put two dead chipmunks Samantha caught in a Ziploc bag on the chair. I called him when I got home and he just laughed and laughed. Such a sick, twisted sense of humor. I should have brought them home so Maggie could eat them and she would have. Maggie loves dead, stinky things. Samantha just catches them and leaves them as gifts and trophies at the back door.

Confessor Cromwell Preaches to the Children of the Atom...

Injection in the Morning…

Let us hope this goes a long way to making me feel better. I feel as if my long acting injection ran out long ago last week. It will be good to see Rebecca’s rosy cheeks in the morning. I’ve already called Old Fuss and Feathers and got him to fill the prescription so I am ready to go. I just have to drive by the pharmacy, grab the shot, and head to Kamath Medical in the morning.

Glittermom, I got Old Fuss and Feathers all hooked up and he is watching that Auburn football disc incessantly. I am glad I don’t have to live with him or he would be driving me crazy right now.  He turns the volume up so loud it rattles your eardrums. He is already hard of hearing and he likes it loud anyway on top of that.

My dearest Maggie has been wild tonight. I like to see her feeling her oats. Something has unlocked her inner puppy. All her chew toys are scattered about the house and she keeps running outside to bark awhile and flies back inside to keep up with me and what I am doing. She’s on a down moment right now licking her paws as she lay on the rug next to me and this computer room computer. That means she is sublimely content. It will take the slightest noise outside (squirrel fart) and then she will be tearing out the dog door to go bark another thirty minutes. If I were to say, “Here Kitty, Kitty,” she would go absolutely nuts.