A Hard Day’s Night

I feel much better tonight. I finally got some good sleep this afternoon and calmed down. I and my doctor adjusted my medications somewhat. He took me off luvox and campral and added lithium for my readily apparent mood swings. He also re-diagnosed me as schizo-affective instead of just paranoid schizophrenic, which means I have bi-polar as well (like I need another mental illness label). I feel like such a psychiatric guinea pig. I did have to deal with my father's driving today, which is atrocious and notorious within the family.

At one point, dad stopped at Mrs. Story's Dairy Dee to get a slaw dog, chips, and a drink.

"You hungry?" He asked me as he sat eating his supper in his car.

"I think I am gonna puke," I replied at the smell and sound of him gorging himself, and I stood by his Honda with the dry heaves as my stomach did flip flops.

I was that messed up that I would pass up a free meal and you know me and food. I do like to eat and eat well, and the Dairy Dee has some of the best hot dogs in the area.

The noise and people surrounding that restaurant made my head swim and my anxiety surge. I felt like I was going to jump out of my skin. I was so glad when I could arrive home and retire to the quiet confines of my little unassuming apartment. I felt 100% better after lying down and taking a very long nap. I was just so tired.

This evening found me quietly working on improving the little clunker of a computer I am using these days. I installed two Raptor 10,000 rpm hard drives in RAID 0 (taking two drives, striping them, and effectively doubling their performance) and reinstalled Windows Vista and got everything shipshape. It made a big difference in the speed of my computer and I am much happier with the piece of junk I am using to blog these days. Man, do I miss my old computer that died.