Much Captain Morgan was Consumed Today...

Charlie saved the day tonight. I owe him a very big and huge favor. The tables have certainly turned regarding my own sobriety and my father's increasing tendency to get drunk. My father had called me about 10 PM to tell me he was on the way. It was growing especially late and I was beginning to get worried. Dad clearly sounded drunk over the phone. I immediately called Charlie's cell phone and then called my father back.

"Charlie is going to pick you up and we all three will go buy groceries," I told my father. "Charlie wants to go with us to help me find some bargains (white lie)."

"Tell him I said to pull a rabbit out of his hat," my father laughed drunkenly and gleefully.

The Caprica soon pulled up and the excitement ensued. It was about 11 PM and growing later and later. I dreaded having to go through those self checkout lanes as they are a pain the ass when you have lots of groceries.

"Where are you going?" Charlie asked as my father ambled across my front yard almost falling down.

"I'm taking a piss in Andrew's shrubbery on the side of his house," my father said loudly so the whole neighborhood could hear us.

"I've had rum and cokes all afternoon with my old college roommate," dad then said proudly of himself.

Dad's old college roommate is a bad influence on my father. He always has been.

"You didn't get enough," my father then insisted adamantly as we looked at the total tally.

I had only spent $50 dollars. I was quite bumfuzzled by this whole endeavor.

"John, he's got enough dammit," Charlie said. "Let's go get you in the bed.

I think I got enough groceries in that quite a few items were free due to the chaotic nature of those self checkout kiosks. Certain things we had absentmindedly not "rung up" as we say in the South