Grand plans are forming within my feeble mind. Plans to walk for mental health. Went for a long walk in the rain today carrying my umbrella, and I realized how much walking means to me. I passed numerous houses where safely within were ensconced their occupants. People living other lives. Other desires. Other fears. Other wants. Other needs. It made me feel so small and inconsequential. As if my own problems didn't matter so much in the grand scheme of things.
Stopped by Rosa's house and talked for a minute. I had something on my mind that needed saying. I wanted to pour my heart out to her. It was aching.
"I love you," I told her standing at the front door as the rain dripped off the rim of my cap. "I don't want to be alone and I need you."
"I love you, too!" She replied. "Stay with me tonight."
"I will see you after I get finished with my walk and making sure Maggie has food and water."
"What brought this on?" Rosa then asked as I started to walk away. "You were so against us getting back together."
"I just love you," I replied. "I realized today after last night and this morning how much you mean to me."
And I do. I love her more than anything. She has been wanting us to get back together and the time is nigh. I will sleep well tonight in the arms of someone who loves me. Life is no fun being alone all the time.
24 comments:
awwww...
bless!
That's so true, but I hope you're getting back with her because you want her and not because you want someone. Don't let this comment offend you, I'm probably just talking to myself anyway :)
Why can't you take Maggie with you to Rosa's house?
Amelia,
Maggie want walk on a leash. I need to teach her how. She gets loose and I am afraid she will get run over in traffic.
Get a harness instead of a leash for Maggie, it might work better. Panda got one for Christmas. As for Rosa, I am glad she's back, but take it slow. Fleur makes a valid point.
Wonderful! Being lonely is just the worst, I know. Rosa cares deeply for you. Just take it one day at a time, Andrew. I too believe you are going to be just fine! :)
Lucky you to have someone to love.
Thanks for leaving the comment about my archives not working. I changed it to a flat list~do not like it~too much stuff on the sidebar, but it is working. In a way glad Freewebs got on my last nerves, motivating me to move all the stuff.
Blogging does add a structure to life, so keep at it. I think it would be cool if someone made a homeless prime time show.
The show could be "4th Ave Blues" and start with the camera panning your house as the gray sky changes to dawn while credits are rolling. It could show you dragging yourself out of bed, fixing breakfast, sitting at the computer than fades into a memory. Adventure with Ferret, the continuing saga of Rosa.
Reading The Homeless Guy's blog and picturing his scene (that is the days show would move to Nashville and close with the shot of you at the computer).
Andrew,
Has Maggie even been alone all night by herself? I am such an animal lover (as many other people are too.) I know she has been your lifeline at times. I worry that she will be scared all night alone. What if she has to go out for a tinkle?
Good for you and Rosa. It's a good thing to have someone who understands. Good luck, you two crazy kids. As for Maggie, Tippy and Mike are trained to stay alone over night once in a while so I think she'll be ok. You might want to give her a toy or a towel with your scent on it...
sharyna
I know you've been very lonely. You and Rosa have been friends for a long time and I know you both care about each other.
alyceclover, my friends and I could probably make something similar to that. We're very well trained in the art of video making. :P
i am glad that you have Rosa in your life again!
I'm glad you have each other. Love is such a beautiful part of life.
Congrats on 40 days by the way! Wow!!
40 days! And what a great way to celebrate with expressions of love and lust!
Happy early New Years!
I'm slowly climbing out of my Christmas time off! :)
Always,
Crusty~
i'm happy to hear this andrew. you deserve to be happy, and with someone who loves you.... and who you love.
take care my brotha
Life is definitely not fun being alone all the time. We all need to love and be loved by someone. I wish you all the best as always and wish for you a bright & happy 2008. I just love the pictures of Maggie. I didn't participate in your poll because none of the choices fit. I started to read your blog several years ago when diary-x was still up and running. Back then, your blog was called Homeless in Alabama and I think I found you through a link from a comment on The Homeless Guy's blog way back when he was on blogger. The years do fly by, don't they?
I think it is great that you and Rosa are working things out. She stabilizes you I think. You both are good for each other!
Have fun tonight and tell her we all say hello!
I'm happy that you and Rosa can be friends again... I know you both care about each other. I just hope you're not "settling", ya know? I read LaFleur's comment... she does have a point. Just take it slowwwww.
Congrats on the 40 days w/o alcohol!
Quite bittersweet. I hope it is all you knew it would be and you have a good night. Happy New Year:)
You have good intentions and caring comments surrounding you Andrew - Pick the one that fits for you.
As for me: I believe that "taking it slow" is for the young. My middle-aged sensibilities suspect that celebrating the here-and-now is paramount. We are all going to be dead soon(ish)....ya know what I mean?
Have a wonderful evening, and know that you, unlike most others on this planet, have people from all over the world thinking about you and wishing you the very best *right now*
Close your eyes and feel it!
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I hope your night was a happy one. How did Maggie do?
Andrew,
I know how much you like trains and railroads and I happened to come across the following link. Hope you haven't seen it before!
http://cooltrainpix.blogspot.com/
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