Thursday, September 29, 2016

Purple Hued Madness...

"Why do you never make eye contact with me when I am talking to you?" my father rather curiously asked tonight. "You've done so well lately and made so many strides in your life."

I felt like the shy kid at the end of the neighborhood Cul-de-sac that watches his friends out his living room window - wanting to join in, but something was holding him back. Words can be shards -- like icy daggers in the back. I tend to avoid negativity.

Dad was reveling me in my brother's and sister's college follies this evening. They both went to Tulane together and graduated together. My brother got a degree in biomedical engineering, and my sister got a degree in anthropology. I got a degree in street smarts from George Jones University.

"I don't know," I replied wisfully. "Maybe it is a lack of confidence or me feeling subservient."

Dad followed me into my bedroom -- all the while talking loudly. I was putting on my favorite purple sleep shirt. I was going to bed after I wrote this blog post. It has been forgettable day to say the least.

"I hate it that you feel that way," dad said. "Are you scared of me?"

"No," I told my overbearing parent, but that he did have control of a lot of things in my life.

What a True Parody!

Soldiers on those Gladiator Fields!

Auburn Tigers
2-2, 3rd in West Division
Saturday, October 1, 2:30 PM on SECN
Jordan-Hare Stadium, Auburn, Alabama
It has been a tough football season for my father and my brother. 

Wednesday, September 28, 2016

There is Always that First Time...

My father and I had arrived at Steve's Car Care this afternoon. We both prayed they were still open and there were still several people mulling about.

"Do me a favor and take your medications while I am inside paying Steve," my father told me.

At first, I had a deer in the headlights look. "Are you drunk?" I wanted to ask my father. I got in the back of dad's car and finally found that blister pack of crazy meds. I took my allotted amount and put the package back in the trunk. I could have had a Clonopin party! hehe

"Do you realize what you just did?' I asked my father. "You just trusted me to take my medications without supervision."

"Well, you certainly have been acting like an adult lately and I think you need to be rewarded. Just don't wear your sleeping clothes around town."

Dad keeps saying he is going to let me off the leash as far as my grocery shopping is concerned as well, but he has been saying that for months now. I've quite grown fond of him being with me to do that task. It is quite the game to see how much food I can get with the littlest amount of money.

Tired of sleeping Suzanne Vega.

Charioteer's Chariot is Back in Action...

"I'm coming to get you to take you to get your car," my father said on his iPhone. "Put on some decent clothes."

I chuckled as I dressed for my father's arrival.

"Now, that is not acceptable wear," my father said as he arrived and told me as I walked across my front yard. "That looks like something you would sleep in!"

I had on nice khaki shorts and a bleached and soft white cotton t-shirt which was super comfortable to wear. I also had on bright white socks and my Nike Air Jordans shoes that had been washed in my washer just a few days before.

"Jesus Christ dad!" I exclaimed blasphemously. "We are only going to the mechanic's shop! Those guys will look dirtier than the cars they work on."

My father grumbled some and told me to get in the car. Fish gotta swim and birds gotta fly and all that jazz.

The Maggin's Mental Illness Advice? A Good Meal and Some Sleep...

And sleep we did... Sometimes, you have trouble quieting your mind to do so, though.

There is no greater love for the Magster when I crawl into the bed in the middle of the afternoon. Here she comes running!

"You know where it be at!" Maggie would exclaim in Southern African American vernacular.

"Come here sweetheart," I told her giving her a good back scratch. "Nice knowing you."

In moments I was sound asleep for a few hours until my father called.

"Do you want some of my pork chops and rice for supper?" he asked.

"HELL YEAH!" I replied.

My father laughed wholeheartedly and told me he would bring me some when he brought my medications tonight.

Mom? Mrs. Martha? Don't Leave Us...

I was looking at the picture I posted of mom driving yesterday. She has aged so much in the past five years. Dad says it is her addiction to Xanax. I noticed she had on nice clothes, make up, a gold watch, and some pearl earrings.

"It can take a toll on your body and behavior," my father said.

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Think Twice, Look Thrice...

I was asleep in my lazy boy with Maggie's huge mass on my lap when I heard mom's car's horn blow loudly outside. Maggie flew out of my lap to look outside. I looked at the clock on my wall. 7:00 pm. Right on time.

"I can't believe she drove after all that we've been through with her!" was what I was thinking as I stood up to go outside. I felt like an angry parent with a petulant child.

I walked out the front door to find Mrs. Sandra at the helm of mom's car.

"Mrs. Sandra!" I exclaimed jovially. "I thought momma had driven when I heard her car horn!"

Sandra just laughed and laughed.

"We fooled ya!" she said laughing even more.

Lunch Lady Land...  Is also what I was thinking!

Sandra handed me my olfactory pleasing Mexican meal and took my mother home to get Sandra's car. Mrs. Sandra is a bonafide lunch lady. She was supervisor for a local school's lunch room for years and years and retired.

Carless in the Valley...

Ole! Ole!

It seems my mother is in a similar predicament as I am in. Mom can no longer drive to the Mexican restaurant. She can only drive to my house and to the hair salon. Mom's good friend Mrs. Sandra is picking her up and driving her to the Mexican restaurant tonight and will bring her home. I will be designated driver for everything else.

"Do you think Mrs. Sandra will mind me bringing you your Mexican meal?" mom asked me over the phone.

"You will have to ask her," I told my mother. "Maybe she won't mind as it is less than a mile from my house to the restaurant."

Mrs. Sandra just called me and told me she was bringing me supper from the Mexican restaurant tonight.

What a Sad End to a BMW Z3...
You don't realize how nice having a car is unless you no longer have it for a few days. I absentmindedly stood up a moment ago to drive to Circle K to get a fizzy drink. I had forgotten my car is at Steve's Car Care. "Shit!" I muttered with a defeated feeling as I fell into the waiting arms of my recliner. I couldn't even go get my sodas mom gives me every day. I still haven't heard anything from dad about what was wrong with my car. 

"Be sure to tell them my front turn signal is out," I told my father last night as I rode with him to Kroger.

These kinds of details escape my father at times as he can seem kind of aloof.

"Gotcha," dad replied as he repeated what I said to him. "Right front turn signal!"

My father recently got a ticket for a headlight being out so I hope he will remember to do this. I don't have the tools to take my headlight out or I would do this task myself.

The Wayward Voyager Returns Home...

I was standing at my freezer getting some ice for a drink when I looked outside my kitchen window and grinned. George was sitting on his porch in his favorite chair with his shirt off. I probably will never find out what happened, but I am sure glad he's home. He is acting like he never left.

Monday, September 26, 2016

The Journey Begins With Our Jermaine...

"Hey bud!" I said as I patted on Jermaine's humongous breadth of broad shoulders when I stepped inside Kroger.

I gave him a good "man hug". I know I was dancing with the devil and fate -- hoping not to get caught in a lengthy conversation.

He was already in his mobility cart about to toodle around the store.

"How is Alec?" Jermaine asked back about my brother.

He always mispronounces my brother's name.

"He lives in Auburn now," I told my good, but sometimes aggravating friend. "I will tell him you asked about him and his family."

Jermaine seemed thrilled.

My father and I were both very quiet tonight. I went my way and he went his. He said he was going to leave me shopping and go get his car filled up with $1.60-gallon gas. He used his Kroger fuel points. Of course, this left me standing up front as I waited on my father.

"Do you need any help?" I was asked about six times from the employees.

I still had a quite a bit of eats from last week -- two tubs of chicken salad and a loaf of bread among others. We also had a smattering of bacon, cheddar cheese, and eggs left. This allowed me to buy a bunch of sweet things that would normally be out of my budget range. I also had 10 cans of Chef Boyardee that I wasn't excited about, but they were on sale last week for 10 for $10. I told my father they were my emergency rations.

"Let me see what you have in there," asked my father when he had reentered the store and gazed into my cart. "You need to get some more substantial food."

I explained I had food at home that was left from our last foray of shopping. He then seemed placated.

"I can't believe they had an Edwards lemon meringue pie in stock!" he exclaimed grinning "I love a good slice for breakfast.".

Give it to Andrew! He'll Eat Anything!
Well, not quite anything, but I can be culinarily adventurous at times when I feel like it. I love to find and try new Asian meals -- a habit my ex-wife instilled within me. She loved anything Asian.

Right now, I have a terrible craving for my cereal and milk. As soon as I get my groceries squared away tonight, I am eating a large bowl of frosted flakes.

Lately, I've been kind of a broken record when it comes to my groceries. I find something that is easily prepared and that tickles my taste buds and I stick with that plan. The only things that are dropping off my grocery list this week is various salads and loaf bread. I quickly grew tired of the two after eating them for two weeks. l also, too, grew tired of all the various preservatives in the bread that grocery stores peddle these days.

The Day Of Wayward Cars...

George's Chariot Rides Again But With the Wrong Charioteer...

They came and got George's car today which was certainly an ill omen. It was an elderly man with a silver mane driving George's ex-wife's car. She jumped out, cranked the car, and drove off. There was no sad fanfares or goodbyes. I stood outside in the blazing sun fooling with my car as they drove off. It was a terribly melancholy moment for me. Nobody said hello or what was going on. I guess it is truly none of my business. I do know that George loved his car.

My CR-V is Unpleasantly Down For the Count...

I am having car battery and car cranking problems again. Dad and I drove it back to AutoZone to test the battery and the alternator. They said everything should be working fine.

"There is certainly something not working right!" my father exclaimed and scoffed. "Those Goons at AutoZone don't know what the hell they are doing."

I had to relent and agree...

Dad suggested we then take it to Steve's Car Car in West Point and let him look at it. They recently fixed Dad's Honda as the automatic locks on his passenger's side stopped working. They had to order a servo and Steve got him fixed up one more time.

"We need a second opinion," is what my father told me.

"We have a dead battery," my father said to the proprietor soon after arriving at Steve's. "Can you get us straightened out?"

"We will do the best we can," a filthy and dirty clothed mechanic replied. "I probably will get to it this afternoon."

I saw a whole rack of different sizes of brand new batteries on the wall which was a very good sign.

Sunday, September 25, 2016

What's a Little Hard Earned Chicken Among Friends?
Mom keeps calling me incessantly on the phone. As soon as I sit back in front of my retro-gaming computer, the phone will ring again. She knows not to call my father as it will get off with him in that she is trying to hurry him up.

"Mom, I know they are running late," I told her. "They should be here in next 30 minutes or so. Just be patient!"

"I'd rather not do this at all," my mother replied bitterly. "They drive me crazy making us wait for so long."

According to my mother they left 2 hours ago.

Just be thankful you have family who cares and are getting you supper... Is what was forefront in my mind. Just sayin...

Fast Forward to 8:00pm...
Maggie started to put up a crazy fuss, barking maniacally, and signaling Papa and Charlie were here. It had gotten very dark by now, the front yard illuminated by a porch lamp, and you could barely see them walking across the front of the yard. They are Maggie's favorite duo around these parts. I was sitting in front of my computer in the back bedroom playing a highly endearing Sega CD game called Popful Mail. I flew into the den to see the Kentucky Fried crew and let them inside.

"We had to wait on them to fry more chicken," Charlie told me with an air of exasperation to his voice as he walked through the threshold of my front door.

Charlie was cussing up a storm in disdain.

"Goddamn, we go there every Sunday night for years," my father said tersely. "You would think they knew we were coming and have plenty of chicken for us."

"Ah, welcome to the world that is filled with fast food logic," I told my father with a hearty laugh.

Dad and I hurried through the medication ritual and Maggie's ritual.

I thought my kitchen was pretty clean, but Charlie found several things to do. Charlie and my father stayed for long enough for Charlie to clean out my freezer and fridge and the inside of my oven.

The Non-Conversationalist...

Rip Van Winkle Has Returned For All His Glory...

I have no excuse for the lack of writing other than I have been sleeping a whole helluva lot of my days away lately. It leaves me with little to say and I kind of lost my muse for a few days there as well. Dad says I am experiencing a depression, but I believe it is just a routine thing which happens to my mother and I. It is just like the weather this time of the year modulating from hot to cool as the seasons try to change. The time change will just about put the proverbial last nail in my SAD (seasonal affective disorder) coffin.

I'd Make a Terrible Telemarketer...

...Please? Just Buy My Product...

Dad was picking on me hardheartedly this afternoon about how hard it is to talk to me on the phone.

"I am not that bad!" I exclaimed while I chuckled knowing it was the truth.

I did relent and said I was very aggravating to talk to at times. I don't catch the normal conversational cues as in what to say now, what to say next, and when to get off the phone. At least, I did keep up with our religion which is college football last night. My father was astonished that I knew what happened on the last play of the game. Auburn won on a technicality and an action replay of the last few moments of the game.

"Your brother, brother-in-law, and I about had an heart attack over that game! Also, I didn't get home till 2am last night so I am worn out today."

He wouldn't miss it for the world, neither would my brother.

The Chuck Wagon is a Coming...

"In about a few hours or three, Charlie Mack and I will be bringing you your Sunday meal." my father told me. "Do you want your usual?"

"Get me what mom gets!" I exclaimed to my father. "I don't think I could stomach another meal of Kentucky Fried and Greasy Chicken."

"Okay," my father said, "I am getting you the Wendy's double with cheese and a large Coke."

The last time I ordered Wendy's it was too salty to eat my burger. Let's hope history doesn't repeat it self.

Friday, September 23, 2016

Get Yer Game On...
I've spent most of the day "ripping" games from their corresponding CDs and DVDs. According to digital copyright law, you are allowed one archival copy of each game you own.

I was a voracious video game consumer around the time the PlayStation came out in the 90's so I have tons of great games along with the Sega Saturn and Sega CD games I also own.

The devil is in the details and now I have to organize all these files and transfer them to my emulation and gaming computer.

A good source to find out about this is to check out the emuparadise website which is the best emulation website. You can get roms, bios, and emulators to get you off to a good start.

Calmness Pervades...

Mom called me at lunch. She wanted to go get a chocolate milkshake from Sonic. Since I am now her designated driver, I told her I would gladly pick her up under the portico in 10 minutes. We both ended up eating banana splits, though. I also got an order of those cheddar peppers which is like crack to a crack addict when it concerns me. Mom ate half of them before I could shoo her away.

"Go get your own Cheddar Peppers," I told mom looking exasperated, but interested at the same time. "Do you want me to order some more?"

Literally in moments another carhop walked out with another order of cheddar peppers.

Thursday, September 22, 2016

Do it For the Paws -- Remember the Paws...

Well, I tried to trim Maggie's nails and she went bonkers and all hell broke loose tonight -- she yelped very loudly and went flying out the dog door to escape the evil human that was me.

She finally came out of hiding when my father arrived for the medication ritual tonight. I knew she wouldn't miss that for anything in the world She came flying through the dog door to come and greet my father in my den.

"Damn, I wish your mother would welcome me home like the treatment Maggie gives me," my father said jokingly.

"Don't try that anymore," my father told me when I explained what happened. "We'll get it done when we take Maggie for her annual checkup. Your mother is already talking about and obsessing over her annual visit."

"Don't tell mom we are doing this or a quagmire of problems will result," I replied to my father with much warning, "Caveat Emptor and all of that."