Weird and Wild Weather…

The weather got crazy for a few moments this afternoon. We had just torrential and blinding rain for about an hour and then the wind kicked up something fierce. A very large pecan tree limb fell on the corner of my house, but it didn’t damage my roof. I was very lucky. Tracy and I heard it fall with a very loud crack and boom. I will have to get dad’s chainsaw and cut it up tomorrow. A tornado passed just a few miles to our south through Tuskegee and Wedowee. I told Tracy we were getting in the basement if the weather got any worse. The alarm on my weather radio kept going off with tornado warnings. Luckily, it didn’t have to come to that. The rain ended and then the sun decided to peek through the clouds almost miraculously – the proverbial calm after the storm.

Spring has definitely sprung in the South and next comes very cold overnight temperatures. We are supposed to get down to 25 degrees the night after next. I fear all these budding and leafing trees are going to get their buds and tender leaves killed in the process. Weather radio is already warning about it and here my lawn was just starting to get green again. C’est la vie!

Nothing Stops the Dynamic Duo…

Maggie, the proximity alarm, alerted me to their presence. I opened the door and welcomed the dynamic duo inside. Papa and Charlie have just left after bringing pizza and Maggie’s chicken tenders. Christmas comes every Sunday night for Maggie. Charlie upped the ante and got Tracy and I the “extra most bestest” pepperoni pizzas with lots of extra cheese and pepperoni. Charlie has always known how to please a crowd. I was just thrilled they remembered to get Maggie her chicken tenders. I forgot to remind them.

“He’s had some wine,” Charlie said…

A new Popeye’s opened on fast food row down 29. Of course, my father and Charlie were one of the many in town who wanted to try it.

“We waited in line for forty minutes,” Charlie said of their journey to the land of fried shrimp tackle boxes.

“That explains the 9 pm arrival,” I smarmily replied.

I wanted a chicken sandwich and Charlie got that at McDonald’s – a southern buttermilk encrusted chicken sandwich and it was delicious. Maggie got one as well. She ate everything but the dill pickles. It was reminiscent of Chick-fil-A.

Dad was acting all goofy – laughing loudly, boisterously and talking crudely about sex and women.

“What’s up with him?” I asked Charlie with a chuckle as he was filling Maggie's water bowl in the kitchen.

“He’s had some wine,” Charlie told me with a smirk.

I can’t be mad with my father for some reason. I should be raising hell. It is all rather comical to be honest – hearing my father carry on like he does after a few glasses of wine. I was just glad Charlie was driving tonight.

“Charlie? Don’t worry about my trash,” I told him as he was stepping back into the kitchen.

“You sure?” Charlie asked.

“I will take it out in the morning,” I replied. “Now, you all head on and get Horsefly his meal.”

Maggie and I were both sad to see them go. They really liven up a house in a hurry.

Trouble in Paradise…

9:00 pm rolled around and Charlie and Papa still hadn’t arrived with my and Maggie’s meals. I tried calling my father but it dumped me into his voicemail. 9:30 pm came and soon they pulled up to the curb. That's the latest arrival of them all. Maggie had been looking out the window for over two hours. She just went nuts and never gave up hope that they would arrive. I told her they were coming too early.

“We were caught in the drive-thru from hell,” Charlie told me.

“I got to thinking y’all had a car accident,” I replied.

I had ordered Wendy’s (a double/w cheese) tonight and thought that might have been the hang up, but it wasn’t. It was that dastardly KFC who always gets orders wrong and has a slow drive-thru. I’ve deemed them the screwiest KFC in the South. Horsefly has to have their chicken tenders thus the reason Charlie and Papa put themselves through that every week. They consistently cause problems.

Maggie was really “talking” to Charlie and Papa tonight. It always warms my heart when she does that. She was so excited she was almost beside herself. She doesn’t get to see them nearly enough as she wants to.

It has been a quiet day other than tonight’s little SNAFU. Charlie brought breakfast about 9 am – three sausage biscuits and a diet Coke. I drove over to my father’s house after finishing breakfast. He had his Christmas tree up and lit and I helped him decorate it. It really looked beautiful. Dad inherited mom’s beautiful ornaments and decorations. I always get a live tree so I have to wait until mid December to get my Christmas tree as they dry out so easily. I am hoping Kroger sells Christmas lights so I can decorate my shrubbery and step railing tomorrow night after we buy groceries. My neighbors across the street are putting on a grand show with lights and Christmas icons that are projected on the side of their house.

Charlie? Meet Tracy! Tracy? Meet Charlie…

I was sound asleep when there was a loud knock on the door abruptly awakening me. It was a very rainy evening and the rain had lulled me to sleep earlier in the afternoon. I was so drowsy I could barely stay awake. Maggie was going bonkers so I knew who it was. It was dad and Charlie with my two pepperoni pizzas on this our Sunday night feedings.

“Andrew! How are you?” Charlie asked loudly as he stepped through my front door.

“Good to see you, Charlie,” I replied, giving him a hug.

Charlie went directly to gather all my trash and to give Maggie fresh food and water. He was all business tonight.

Then there was another loud knock on the door. “Who could that be?” I wondered. It was Tracy. She had a big duffel bag packed hanging from her shoulder signifying she was sleeping over. This was a surprise to me, but a very nice surprise. I welcomed her inside and told her things were busy at the moment.

“Hey Tracy,” my father said giving her a hug. “How are you?”

“I’m fine, Mr. John,” she replied shyly.

Charlie came walking out of the kitchen with trash bags in hand. During my slumber, I had forgotten to take out all the trash.

“You must be Tracy,” Charlie said putting down the trash bags to give her a hug.

“Tracy? This is my good friend and my father’s best friend, Charlie,” I told her.

“Nice to meet you, sir!” Tracy said.

“I’ve heard such good things about you,” Charlie told her. “You treat Andrew right!”

“You will hear more out of Charlie for sure,” I said with a laugh. “Wait till her finds out where you live and he will start feeding you!”

Charlie said, “Oh, hush!” and laughed.

Maggie was just beside herself during all of this. Tracy? Charlie? Papa? It was almost too much to bear and she happily went around greeting everybody and sniffing fingers checking ID’s.

Papa and Charlie soon left. They ran across the yard in the rain to Charlie’s car and drove off. Horsefly was awaiting his chicken tenders.

“Let’s get your car in the driveway and off the street,” I told Tracy as she handed me her keys. “Someone drunk will hit it in the night if we don’t.”

I braved the rain and pulled Tracy’s car in behind mine.

“You’re going to have to help me eat all this pizza,” I told her stepping inside and she said she was famished.

The pizza was piping hot as if just out of the oven making it doubly good and the cheese all gooey and stringy..

Tracy is now in the shower. We are going to watch Interstellar once she cleans up some and then go to bed. We both have early starts in the morning. Tomorrow is going to be a long day for Tracy. She has to work a full day and I think she has two classes tomorrow night.

I Doth Protest!

Dad was carrying KFC and Charlie was carrying cleaning supplies as they walked across my yard this evening.

“I’m cleaning your bathroom in case Tracy comes to stay awhile,” Charlie told me with a sly smile.

I protested greatly, but to no avail. I hate for him to have to go to all that work on my behalf, but it’s Charlie’s way of saying he loves me. Dad got on the couch and watched Masterpiece Theater while Maggie vied for his attention.

“There’s a lot of noise going on in there,” dad hollered to Charlie as he cleaned. “You haven’t fallen in have you?”

“Oh shut up, John!” Charlie replied with a laugh.

“Charlie? My toilet tends to run once every few hours. What could that be?”

“Your plunger is not seating properly. You may need a new one. I’ll get Mike the plumber out here to see about it tomorrow,” Charlie replied.

Charlie cleaned for about 30 minutes until he was satisfied everything was spic and span.

“Are we ready to go?” dad then asked.

“Let me check Andrew’s trash,” Charlie said.

I had beaten him to the punch and carried out all the trash earlier in the day. There was a fresh bag in all the trash cans.

I hated to see them go as I was quite enjoying the company and activity going on in the house. Dad said I seemed down in the dumps tonight. He said I sounded that way earlier on the phone as well.

“The holidays are hard for people with a mental illness aren't they?” he asked me.

I didn’t say what I wanted to say, but I defeatedly said, “Yeah, they can be tough.”

Love Has Many Faces…

I woke up in a panic. Had I overslept? I was just worn out from yesterday. Dogged tired. Charlie hadn’t arrived yet so that gave me some comfort. I looked at my cellphone and the time was 10 am. Whew!

“Maggie? Charlie’s coming!” I told my precious dog.

She got in the window on lookout. Charlie arrived at 10:30 am. Maggie started to yelp and whine loudly signifying he had arrived.

“Meals on wheels is running late this morning,” Charlie told me as he walked across my yard.

Maggie and I greeted him at the front door.

Charlie came inside after handing me two biscuits and a giant diet Coke. He got on the couch with Maggie who put on a grand show of affection. Maggie was feeling her oats this morning. She would playfully run around the den and jump back on the couch. Rinse and repeat. Charlie laughed and laughed.

“Look at her go,” Charlie said pleased.

It was going to be a busy morning. I had a date to meet dad at 11 am. If I don’t call him at 10:50 am he begins to worry and will call me instead.

Dad was enjoying his sausage biscuit and senior coffee when I arrived. Charlie just had left.

Politics and CNN was the viewing choice this morning. Trump (Little Daddy) has been really busy as of late. Politics bores me and I consider it a fool’s errand.

“You better sit out Thanksgiving this year,” my father told me. “There is going to be lots of champagne, beer, and wine. I’ll be sure to bring you and Maggie a big plate of food.”

I said okay a little bit disappointed. I always get left out on the holidays. It makes me think my father is embarrassed of me and that is his true motive for keeping me at home.

The Harbinger of Things to Come?

It was 39° degrees when I walked out of my house to drive to the grocery store. I liked to have never gotten my windshield and rear window to defog. Once cleared, I hit the road heading straight through downtown and then onto highway 29. It’s a straight shot to Kroger from there.

I set about my shopping tasks upon arriving at Kroger. Dad would soon follow right behind me as he lives a little farther away. I knew what I wanted and where it was at. I ended up getting those sports drinks, A1 sauce, and ground chuck. My total was $69 dollars for the night – the highest in weeks.

“Are you getting enough to eat?” my father asked me. “Don’t be like your dear mother and overdo the diet.”

“I’m fine,” I assured my father. “I get enough extraneous meals from you to balance out my nutrition.”

“But you don’t have any real meals in your cart!”

I thought for a moment there it was going to be time for Lean Cuisines, but thankfully dad let the moment pass. I left him for he had shopping of his own to do.

“Nice truck!” I told the fella next to me as I loaded up my groceries.

He was loading up his groceries as well. He just started talking and talking away telling me the tale of the dent in his truck by a PepsiCo employee.

But I digress…

I subsist off of cheese filled Ritz crackers and peanut butter these days just eating when I feel hungry. You’d be surprised how a tablespoon of creamy peanut butter and a pack of crackers can make you feel full for quite a few hours.

Tonight is a respite for we shall eat, drink and be merry. I have that ground beef browning on the stove (Maggie’s rejoicing) and a few Gatorades are quickly getting cold in the freezer.

Not Long Did I Linger…

Thursday mornings is a time dad and I get together and watch television. We had buttered toast slathered with strawberry preserves for breakfast this morning. It was a sweet treat. Dad is a bad influence as far as my diet is concerned. My sweet tooth rejoiced, though.

“Do you want some coffee?” my father then asked.

“Not this morning,” I replied. “Thank you, though.”

I like my coffee cold brewed these days of the café latte and mocha varieties. The Califia brand.

Dad was acting funny this morning and it perplexed me. I asked him why.

“It’s not you I assure you,” he said. “I feel like I am coming down with a cold and I am going back to bed when you leave.”

I took dad’s trash out to the bin and then came back inside and got an icy cold diet Coke for the road as I like to call it.

“Love you, son!” dad said when I said goodbye.

I told him to get to feeling better and I drove home.

Sleepyhouse…

Papa just stopped by braving the weather with some homemade corned beef hash, buttered biscuits, and a garden salad. He made a homemade dressing for the salad by mixing ketchup and mayonnaise together. It was delicious and a much needed diversion on a dreary night. I think half of Alabama has cabin fever like me after it has rained for three days straight.

“When is it going to stop raining Mr. Meteorologist?” he asked me.

“They say it is going to taper off at dawn,” I replied. “It might get down to 29° degrees Friday morning. The high tomorrow is only going to be 41° degrees.”

I thanked dad profusely for the hot meal and he soon headed on his way after coveting his old TV one more time.

“I still can’t believe you fixed that TV,” he said.

Even Maggie has cabin fever. I walked into the laundry room and Maggie’s head was out the dog door and the rest of her body was inside. I chuckled heartily. This is about the time of the night she likes to sit at the fence gate and bark at things unheard and unseen. She has to assert her dog authority throughout the neighborhood.

They Say Papa and Charlie Are Coming…

“Papa and Charlie are coming!” I exclaimed to Maggie and she ran into the den to get on the back of the couch.

She was on lookout. I was relying on her to let me know when they got here. I had just called my father to get an ETA and he said they were already heading out. 

I sat down in my recliner to watch Jamestown on Georgia Public Broadcasting all the while fiddling with my tablet. Suddenly, there was someone coming up my front steps and then there was a knock on the door.

“Now? How in the hell did you miss them arriving?” I asked Maggie, astonished.

I then decreed that Papa and Charlie were here and opened the front door. Maggie went apeshit bananas and started to bark loudly and howl.

Charlie didn’t clean tonight bless his heart. He just got Maggie some fresh food and water as he does every Sunday night. Dad remarked on the TV again about how good a picture it has. They weren’t here ten minutes and then they were gone again. Papa and Charlie didn’t dawdle tonight.

I got the same thing Horsefly gets and that’s the chicken tender $5 dollar fill-up. Maggie got all the chicken and I ate just the biscuit with some honey to stick to my diet. I later snuck in the kitchen and ate two small bananas and a tablespoon of creamy peanut butter which I relish.

Look What the Cat Drug In…

Wait! I don’t have a cat! Charlie and Papa were extra early with supper tonight. Charlie came pulling up to the curb around 6:30 pm. It caught Maggie and I both off guard. Maggie put on a good show of affection once we realized Charlie’s car was here.

“The time change has gotten me all mixed up,” Charlie said. “Your daddy was ready to go so we just headed out early.”

Usually, they get here in between eight and nine.

“Maggie’s singing,” I told my father as he played the piano.

“You sing about Jesus, girl!” dad hollered at Maggie as he continued to play.

♫♫ Tell Me a Story About Jesus ♫♫

Maggie was just a howling away as my father played and sang a pious hymn.

Charlie was in my kitchen being a busybody gathering all my trash and empty mayonnaise jars. He also checked my heating and air filter to see if it needed changing.

“It will make your blower motor run hot and hard if you don’t change it regularly,” Charlie told me.

“I can’t believe you fixed that television,” dad said after he finished the hymn he was playing. “I’ve forgotten how good a picture it has.”

“I know,” I replied. “Doesn’t it look good? That’s the nicest television I have ever owned.”

I showed him the part I replaced and he told me to show it to Charlie as well.

“I told your brother yesterday that you could have made a good living doing that kind of thing,” my father told me.

Maggie and I were sad to see them go. The house goes from 90 miles an hour to dead quiet when they leave. It is as if the very essence of life is sucked out of my home. They both had meals to eat as well and we can’t forget Horsefly’s chicken tenders. That’s the whole reason we do this every Sunday morning and night.

For the Life of Me!

glittermom said...

Was there a Sunday night chicken pot pie?

Oh gawd! Were Charlie and dad ever so late tonight. Charlie said they sat in the KFC drive thru for 40 minutes. It was almost 9pm before they arrived.

I got two large Little Caesar’s pepperoni pizzas tonight, but they were cold by the time they got here. Nothing my microwave couldn’t handle, but it was still not the same as the usual piping hot pizzas that have so spoiled me. I also got two large and icy cold diet Pepsi which I relished.

I am in a computer gaming mood (new gaming monitor brought this on) so I have been playing computer games all day. There are a lot of classics I’ve never played that I bought and I am catching up on lost time. I am really into Fallout 3 (post apocalyptic America) at the moment. It is such an escape from reality for me – blowing ghouls and zombies into smithereens with my rocket launcher as I explore the vast landscape and try to stay alive.

There is a Little Computering Going On At the Moment…

I was over at my father’s house tonight. Charlie was fixing supper and making him and dad bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwiches.

“I think there is something outside the front door for you,” dad blithely told me looking benign.

This big grin formed on my face and I rushed to the front of the house to open the door. There sat my ultra high definition monitor in all its glory.

“Gotta run!” I said walking through the kitchen with my very heavy box.

“Aren’t you going to even eat a sandwich?” Charlie asked me worriedly.

“It is going to be Lean Cuisine tonight folks,” I replied and Charlie and dad both laughed.

I told them both goodnight as they sat at the kitchen table and hurriedly drove home ever mindful of the police.

It didn’t take me but ten minutes to get the monitor out of the box and attached to my computer. It meets and exceeds my expectations. The picture is just gorgeous. Text has never been so crisp and clear on my computer. Colors just pop off the screen.

Look What Greeted Me at the Backdoor When I Arrived…

“I thought I would cook us a little something special for while we watch our movie,” my father told me.

Luckily, dad cooks like this all the time. There is something just inherently comforting and wholesome about warm, freshly made banana pudding.

Pizza On Slow Time…

I could’ve killed Charlie and my father last night. They didn’t get here with supper until after 9 PM. I think that’s the latest they have ever been.

“We ran into an old friend at Little Caesar’s and had a long chat,” my father told me. “Remember Stacey?”

Stacey worked with my father in the pharmacy for years.

Dad was itching to get home and watch Auburn football highlights on YouTube so they didn’t stay long.

“Y’all give Maggie some lovin’ because she has been sitting in that window for two hours waiting on Y'all,” I told Charlie and my father.

Well, this thrilled my bored little dog’s soul. Maggie even got to “talking” to them. I laughed and we all laughed. I was thrilled to see Maggie so happy.

“I have a film on Netflix I want you to watch,” my father told me before leaving. “It is called The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. We will watch it tomorrow night. You’re gonna love it!”

In 1946 a London-based writer begins exchanging letters with residents on the island of Guernsey, which was German-occupied during WWII. Feeling compelled to visit the island, she starts to get a picture of what it was like during the occupation.

My attention then turned to eating my supper. My two large pizzas were delicious again this week. I savored every bite. I have plenty left to eat throughout the day. I will be grazing pizza like cows graze grass.

Opportunity Gained?

Charlie arrived at 10:30 with Maggie's and my biscuits. Along with the biscuits were two hash-browns. He was running very late. I had given up on him and ate a pack of whole-wheat and cheddar crackers – my stomach was grumbling so.

“What’s going on with George?” Charlie asked me inquisitively.

“He drove off in the sunset a few weeks ago and never returned,” I replied.

“How old was he?” Charlie then asked.

“He was seventy five years old,” I replied.

“He’s got Medicare or Medicaid so he must be in a nursing home somewhere,” Charlie surmised.

I didn’t tell Charlie my most deep-seated fears – that George was in jail or dead. .

“I hope so,” I said to Charlie optimistically. “He almost couldn’t walk there at the end.”

“Your daddy insists on me getting him a senior coffee and I’ll be damned if I don’t about spill it every time,” Charlie said changing the subject.

I laughed and told Charlie he had a heart of gold as he balked.

Off Charlie went to get my father placated. Charlie’s phone was ringing and it was no doubt my father calling worriedly wondering what happened to him.    

My Poor Dearest Maggie…

Maggie doesn’t get to see much of Charlie and Papa these days and it is the highlight of her existence when she does. She gets so excited when they pull up out front in their cars. She used to see my father every night when he brought my medications, but that ritual has long since ceased. For the longest time, she would pine in the window hoping my father would arrive.

Once again, Charlie and Papa just pulled to the curb and gave me my Sunday night meal and pulled away. Maggie barked futilely at the screen door hoping they would come inside and see her. I want them to come inside as well as I miss them and I love them. I always straighten up the house for naught. Maggie is sulking on the couch looking like the most pitiful of creatures you’ve ever seen.

It’s a Jungle Out There…

I just called my father to see what he is up to. He was saying last night he was going to get us up a good supper tonight.

“Hey Papa, what are you doing?” I asked.

“I am working in my yard,” he replied.

Dad loves to toil for hours planting flowers, weeding flower beds, and trimming shrubbery until he is a sweaty and dirty mess. His mother loved this as well. This progeny didn’t get this gene or characteristic. I abhor cutting my grass and pray my shrubbery doesn’t grow too much. When I was having those terrible anxiety attacks years ago, Charlie would come and cut my grass.

“I’ve already gone to the grocery store,” he told me. “How does cubed steak, gravy, and Southern rice sound tonight?” he asked.

Dad will cook the cubed steak until it is very fork tender. I would consider it a Southern delicacy.

“That sounds delicious,” I told him. “Absolutely delicious.”

“I am going to cook those green beans you like so much as well,” he then told me.

Poor Maggie is Such a Skittish Dog…

I started to clip my fingernails this morning and after the first click or snap sound, Maggie went flying out the dog door. She thinks she is going to get her nails clipped as well. She will wait until about two hours have passed before she cautiously comes back inside. We take her to the Vet next week and I will let them do the dirty business of clipping Maggie’s nails. She’s is going to get a bath and grooming as well. Another thing she just hates.

A Meandering Morning...

I watched the most fascinating video on YouTube this morning. It was a shuttle launch from the astronaut's point of view. You got to experience the launch in the cockpit of the shuttle. It has got to be so exhilarating for the crew.


Groceries Ho!
Maggie and I very forlornly ate the very last of my bacon and eggs this morning. We were both starving after a fitful and restful night's sleep. It is grocery time indeed. I called Papa and told him to call me when he is ready to go grocery shopping this afternoon. He doesn't feel like he will get "caught" at the Piggly Wiggly which is beneficial for me.

"You can bring my Cokes and smokes before we shop," I told my father, hopefully saving him a trip to my house.

I just about can't take going grocery shopping at 9 PM at night. Hell, Maggie and I have been going to bed around 8 to 9 PM these days.

It was almost ten in the morning and he was just waking. I have been up since before sunup. He sounded like the walking dead.

There's Light At the End of the Tunnel...

I hope I don't speak too soon, but it seems my insomnia phase is easing. I got some pretty decent sleep last night. Well, I slept about five to six hours, but it was a fitful sleep full of dreams. It seems I am also easing back into a diurnal existence. I think the two coincide. It is odd for me to be awake at 8:30 AM in the morning. It is also weird having all this daytime on my hands. I am waiting until about 9 AM before I call my father to see how is he doing and if he feels any better. I might just surprise him with some breakfast this rainy morning.

I heard from my dear Rosa last night. She called me and I just happened to answer the phone.

"I try to call you all the time, but you never answer the phone," she admonished me.

"Let it ring four times and I will call you back," I told her.

She lives with her daughter in Atlanta now taking care of her grandkids while her daughter works. Rosa is also on disability now so they have some extra income coming in. She has been clean and sober for ten years she told me. I blushed and said aw shucks last night when she told me I was the love of her life. She said I made her feel like a teenager again.

"So? When can I see you?" Rosa asked me catching me off guard.

I stuttered and stammered a little bit.

"I might just have to take a trip to Atlanta," I told her. "I could die for one of those greasy fried peach pies from the Varsity."