Comrades in Arms Against a Tirade! (Hyperbole)

The day started normally. I was the first to arrive so I got everything up and running. The dogs put on this grand cacophony of joy as I walked into the kennels to check on everybody. This day would take on a sour note, though.

Tracey was the first to be berated today. I was standing in the lobby when Mrs. Barbara told her she was still putting too much cat litter in the litter boxes. I was next…

“Sweet pea,” she said to me. “Please leave the thermostat where I set it. Fiscally things are tight right now.”

I said yes ma’am and headed back to the kennels to finish my job for the day.

Later, Tracy walked back into the kennels to talk to me.

“Who pissed in her Cheerios this morning?” Tracy asked with a smirk.

“She told me later her nose is to the grindstone and her job is on the line.”

“What about my job?” Tracy asked worriedly.”I hope I don’t get a pay cut.”

“You’re pretty much irreplaceable in my opinion,” I replied.

“I had a really good time with you last night,” Tracy then told me with a sly grin as she gave me a hug and kissed me on the cheek. “You are welcome any time.”

“Are you nervous about your chemistry exam this evening?” I asked intrigued.

I wish I had taken my second chance towards school more seriously years ago, but I was going to biology exams drunk.

“Just a little bit,” she replied. “I’ve studied as much as I can, though. I never want to see the periodic table ever again.”

I wished her luck and then she went into the outside kennels to mingle with and check on the dogs this chilly day.

Prickling With Pretense…

“Did you ever go to college?” Tracy asked me chirpily as we sat outside on this beautiful Friday.

Our chores were complete and we brought our lawn chairs outside to enjoy the sunshine on this cool and refreshing day. We were hoping some people would show up wanting to adopt some animals.

“I was a music major in college,” I replied. “I attended the University of Montevallo.”

“You sing? Really?” Tracy asked with an astonished look on her face.

“I used to,” I quickly added before Tracy could harangue me into belting out a tune.

Tracy is currently in college to be a veterinary technician so she says. She is doing quite well from the way she talks taking night courses out at the local community college.

“I learn something new and interesting about you every day,” she told me very happily.

“I am still broken up with Michael,” she announced to the both of us. “Kicked him to the curb I did.”

“I will believe it when it has been a few weeks!” I exclaimed.

Mrs. Barbara said, “hear! hear!” echoing my thoughts.

Mrs. Barbara barely fits into her lawn chair. She is rather rotund.

“Her lawn chair is going to break any moment,” Tracy whispered to me and we both snickered.

“Hey, what are you two whispering about?” Mrs. Barbara asked. 

“Oh nothing,” Tracy said as she shrugged her shoulders.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again that Tracy is a busybody. She will tend to your business if you let her. She is also a supreme extrovert which can clash with my extreme introversion. . 

Mad Scientist?

I was thoroughly enthralled with this week's book as Rosa began to ask me a hundred questions just like my mother, the queen, as my brother calls her. My mother can form a question upon her lips for my father before he has even pulled into the garage good.

"Tell me about college," Rosa asked as one of her questions.

"I hated it," I said, not wanting to talk much tonight.

"Come on," Rosa said, pulling my book from my hands to get my full attention.

"It's grade school for adults," I quipped.

"Momma always wanted me to go to college, but I was too busy having my daughter," Rosa replied.

"I was too busy avoiding class to graduate," I said as I laughed, not revealing the real reason I was holed up in my dorm room with a bottle of bourbon most nights neglecting my studies.

At the time I was in college, I was just having a hard time keeping it together. The first symptoms of my mental illness had manifested themselves and I began to withdraw from society and social contact. I had a string of miserably failed relationships that only furthered to complicate matters as my self confidence was destroyed. I would later throw what was left of my self esteem out the window by dropping out of college and taking a night shift job driving a forklift in a towel warehouse. I worked. Came home in the morning and drank a twelve pack of beer. Slept. Then I would get up and go through the same process all over again. Rinse and repeat. I felt like I was trapped in a bad B-movie version of Groundhog Day without the Christmas theme.

"I actually went back a few years ago and tried once again," I then told Rosa. "Sadly, it interfered with my drinking and I didn't go back after one semester."

"That's a shame. I could see you as a professor the way you read and write so much," Rosa replied as she looked at me wistfully.

"Yeah, I could be a mad scientist," I said sarcastically as I smiled and picked my book back up to continue reading. "Literally."

I can be so self deprecating at times. Rosa burst out laughing with me as she leaned up against me upon the couch. It is going to be nice having her stay over tonight.

Growing disappointment…..

My disappointment is growing with my psychology class and instructor. I spent most of the evening studying and I realized all I was doing was memorizing the correct answer without understanding the concepts or why. It makes it pointless to read the book or even crack it open because we are given the actual exam as a study guide. Why go to all that trouble when my other classes are keeping me so busy? It’s important to my major that’s why. I made myself read chapter two and made an effort to understand the concepts. I will just have to look at this class as if it were an online course offering. It is up to me to learn and understand the material and not have an instructor guide me. We still haven’t taken any relevant notes in class and we are starting the third week! Okay, thanks for letting me bitch a little. It feels good to vent my frustrations for a short, few moments.

My first class is at 12 PM tomorrow and my next class isn’t until 7:30 PM. I don’t have to work tomorrow so I am going to use all that idle time to study or at least try. I am going to stay at school and work in the spacious student lounge. I’ve got my backpack all packed and ready to go for in the morning. Now it is time to grab a shower, get a quick bite to eat, and head for bed and read some more. It will be a brutally cold night tonight for the south and the warm comforters of my plush bed await me. I am ready surround myself with them.

Chill out, dude!

I have had this ton of anxiety about school lately. I wake up with butterflies in my stomach and worry all day. I finally got some relief this morning. I realized that I am making a mountain out of a mole hill. This is the reason I start something and then quit. When I can’t do something perfectly, I will quit doing it, period. My father calls it the A or an F syndrome. I can’t find a middle ground. Well, I am tired of worrying and will do my very best to take a laid back attitude towards school come what may.

This morning I was going through my daily reads of blogs. I stopped by Prison Pete and realized something. I am so damn lucky to be free to fail or free to do whatever. Pete would love to have the opportunity to just sit in a class a free man. He would love to take a long walk unhindered or to have the opportunities that I have. I will strive today to just appreciate what makes life worth living. I am alive, healthy, and in a good mental state. I am lucky to have the choice to do what I want.

I shall do small things today to pamper myself. I shall drink lots of good coffee. I shall also take time to enjoy my pipe. I will take a nice long nap this afternoon. Now, enough of pep talk, lets go get a good breakfast started. I think I shall cook a ham and cheese omelet with buttered toast; sounds good to me. I am off to go enjoy life for a change and cast my worries to the wayside.

A quest for spring…..

I took a long walk this afternoon. My goal was to find signs of spring other than my backyard. I am glad to report that I found many. Within weeks here in the south we will have a cornucopia of new growth. All the trees and shrubs are putting on new leaves. The dogwood tree buds are waiting to burst. Daffodils are blooming everywhere. I grow very excited. I am a summer kind of guy. I do not mind the heat of the south at all. Bring on the one hundred degree days. I am ready. I definitely have a case of spring fever.

I have decided to take only one class this summer and that will be Algebra. I discussed it with my father this afternoon. He has a friend who is a judge and whose wife teaches math at the Opelika, Alabama campus. He is going to call her tonight and get advice as to what level class I should start at. Keep in mind that I am a math dufus. I am illiterate when it comes to math to be honest. That is why I want to focus only on it this upcoming semester. My father means so well and wants so very much for me to succeed at this. I think he is more excited about me being in college than I am. I owe him much and I love him. It does put a god damned great deal of pressure on me though. I tried to look at the positive side of the coin today. How many people will have a four year degree paid for? Many will have debt and student loans. I am lucky on those regards.

Oh, bring on those long, lazy, humid days of a southern summer. Bring on the afternoon thunderstorms. I will welcome them all with open arms. I have many adventurous fishing trips and camping trips already planned in my head. I look forward to waking up in my tent on a cool July night to smoke my pipe. The sounds of a far off whip-o-will will great me with a thousand night time stars twinkling in the night time sky. Just a few more short weeks and my dreams will be realized.

Is the glass half full or half empty?

Half full of course but sometimes I get off the beaten path and get transient. It takes a calm day of quiet reflection to get me back on focus. I have much to be grateful for. I have a new home that is very economical and inexpensive. I will very soon have a very dependable used vehicle that is like a Cadillac compared to my current ride. I have a warm bed, good clothes, and good food. I have so many positive things I should focus on instead of the negative but sometimes I digress. Sometimes I need a good, firm kick in the ass to wake me up. I get complacent. I grow spoiled compared to my life a year ago.

I have also cut out the alcohol lately. It just depresses me too much and I find myself growing dependent upon it again. I have too many good things going on than “to play with fire” to quote a friends email. I love to escape reality and to drift away and use alcohol to do this. I don’t think I am an alcoholic in the traditional sense but I do have the insight to know I enjoy its effects too much. I shall once again climb aboard the wagon and start down the wagon trail.

I managed to make a 94 on my very hard biology test. The class average was 70. I exuberantly called my father to report the good news this morning. He and I both were very proud. This was some hard material folks and a lot of it. I am now past the half way point in the semester. I have proven to myself that I can do it. I am now going to focus on learning and not grades. All I have to have is a 2.0 GPA to get into the school of social work. I am going to take the route that if school is growing tiring and toilsome then do something to change that. This morning during lecture I listened intently and worked on a simple form of shorthand. Previously, I would frantically try to write every word to the point of misery and exhaustion. My poor hand would be cramping. I also wouldn’t take the time to comprehend the material as I was so busy scribbling. Today, I took a lackadaisical approach and enjoyed myself. I walked out with learning something new.

A day in the life of a busy man….

Well, I am sitting here drinking my morning coffee and it is still dark outside. I can’t remember the last time I was voluntarily up this early. I feel groggy and tired. It has been a busy week. I have to take my great uncle Bob to Douglasville, Georgia to check on some things. I do not look forward to this. I wanted a quiet weekend alone but got harangued into doing this. It will mean all day in the car as it is a two hour drive from here and a two hour drive back. You have to drive through Atlanta. Sigh.

My tests went okay. You never really know until you get them back. I studied all week and don’t want to see notes or a book for a few days yet until the cycle starts again. I don’t remember college being so much work. Maybe it is because I am at least trying this go around. I am putting in the effort. There are days where it seems overwhelming and I want to give up. I have to call my father for a pep talk when this happens. He did the same for my brother and sister to get them through medical school.

I stopped by “The Homeless Guy” this morning for the first time in quite awhile. I keep hoping that I will read that he has got a home. I see that his updates and entries have been very sporadic and erratic. This is very unlike him as his blog is usually paramount to everything. Maybe this is a good sign. This either means a) he is busy knitting and making money getting ready to find a home or b) he is having one of his “episodes” again. I hope for the latter. Only time will tell and you never know what he will do next. I just would like to see a good ending to a very long and convoluted story I have followed for a year.

Casting off my shackles…..

I’ve had enough studying for a lifetime. No more studying for me. My eyes are burning. My brain is filled to capacity. The big day is tomorrow. My professor assures us this the big hump and then it is all down hill from here. I was so tired tonight that I didn’t want to go to my English class but I made myself go. I had this hunch and it paid off. He gave us a daily quiz on the material that we were supposed to read. Good thing I went. The class was sparingly empty tonight though. He gave us a lecture on the importance of attending class. I am glad I wasn’t one of those “evil” class skipping fiends. 

Tonight, I went by the Piggly Wiggly to buy a half gallon of milk. I was almost out and I love it in my coffee. Guess who I saw? Good old George. He was wearing a Sunday suit and had just come back from his Wednesday night service. He looked like a new man and was clean shaven and his eyes didn’t have that yellow/red pall from his drinking days. He held out his hand for me to shake and he didn’t ask for a beer.

“Good to see you my friend.” I said as I shook his hand.

“I done found religion. Been goin’ with momma.” He said.

“Good for you man. Whatever works for you is what you do.” I replied.

“Hey, do ya want to come this Sunday with me?” He asked.

I could just picture a white guy going to a black church and the glaring stares he would get as he walked down the aisle to sit in his pew. Religion is still extremely segregated here in the south. I respect George’s new beliefs but just don’t get into religion. I choose to abstain.

“Thanks man but I don’t get into church.” I replied.

“Well, anytime you want to go just call me. The Lord can have a powerful affect on your life.” He said and handed me one of his new cab service cards.

I told him how good he looks and told him to take care. We said our goodbyes and I walked to the car and drove home. On the drive home I thought about my future days when I may become a social worker. I wanted to tell George that he himself got himself straightened out and not religion but I thought that would be callous. There will be times in my new career were I will have clients that are religious and may need religion and I should not let my own personal biases interfere in me giving them help and care. If it works for you then let it work. I wish George the best and hopes that this is not some aberration but a lasting change. I am off to crawl into my warm, waiting, and much needed bed. Good night.

A quiet blog for a few days……

Some of you I have grown to be good friends with. If you don’t hear anything from me for a few days then do not fret. I have a very busy and stressful week going on right now. I have a major biology exam covering 4 chapters Thursday. I also have an extensive listening and essay exam for music appreciation on Thursday as well for the Baroque period.

I have learned that I cannot study effectively here at home. The internet is just too tempting and I can waste hours goofing off online when I should be studying. I have to hit the quiet, secluded, local county library to study and have done so all day today. Fortunately, I do no not have to work this week and it is nice when life’s little coincidences work out well.

So, if I do not write a few days then know that I busily cramming material in my already crowded brain. For biology, we are studying cellular organelles, plasma membranes, photosynthesis, and cellular respiration. As you can see, I have a lot of material to cover in a few days. My mind is currently swirling with terms such as mitochondria and Golgi apparatus much as the debris from a shipwreck floats aimlessly on the ocean. I have to get it organized ASAP. Good night and take care.

A very long day ends……..

I see stars! I just walked outside to smoke my pipe and hundreds of twinkling jewels filled the night sky! The murky overcast has broken for a brief moment. It makes me long for the woods but responsibility beckons. No camping until at least Friday.

Tonight was my world literature class and we discussed Sir Gawain and the Green Knight. The hour and fifteen minutes just flew by. I am very interested in medieval history, culture, and music lately and it has been a recurring theme in two of my classes. This greatly helps in keeping up my interest and motivation. If I could make a living being a medieval history scholar then I would have found my calling in life! I would be this frumpy old professor perusing old, dusty tomes for knowledge and imparting it upon others. Sadly, I have seen very few job listings for such a person in my local paper here in this small southern town of 3000. I would definitely be living in a tent again eating cold pork and beans from a can.

My psychology class on the other hand…..well I just sit there and watch my wrist watch. It is the longest fucking one hour and fifteen minutes of my life! Today, he couldn’t get his power point presentation to open so we just sat and talked about popular culture and how it relates to psychology. It was just one big chaotic mess. I felt as if I was amidst a very loud and bustling cocktail party. Information overload! He also started to go over the questions and answers for our next exam. He gave us the exact material that we would have on a printout verbatim. The catch was that it was a multiple choice printout and he didn’t mark which was the right answer so no one knew what to memorize or study. He started to go over it to give us the answers but couldn’t answer them himself so we gave up trying to do that. I felt sorry for the guy. He was a psychology major and couldn’t answer questions from the most basic psychology 200 class material. He is a likeable guy but can’t get his shit together. I am beyond caring any longer and will just take the freebie A grade. Sometimes you just have to roll with the punches.

_________________________

Blogging etiquette……

I realized tonight that many of you take time out of your busy days to write me a comment and I rarely respond. I do so much appreciate the comments and it makes what I write seem worth the effort. I read each and every one with earnestness. I enjoy the discourse and the addition of material to my blog. Comments make a blog vibrant and interesting or I should say you help make this blog vibrant and interesting!

The fact is that I mainly read my comments with my email client and rarely read them by opening my blog. Blogger has this neat feature where all comments can be emailed to you and that is what I do. If you don’t have a responding address in the blog comment then I sometimes forget to come back here and post a reply. I tried tonight to manually go back over some comments and post a response. If I don’t respond sometimes then click on my profile and fire off an email. That will get my attention! Thank you all for the time you take to join in on my life and comment.

This damnable weather…….

I awoke this morning to the theme tune to the PBS cartoon Dragon Tales. Somehow I had turned on the internal timer to my television and it clicked on early into the night but didn’t awake me. The tune was quite catchy I might add and I caught myself singing along. I stumbled along to my kitchen in a sleepy haze to prepare my morning coffee. Before long the pot was percolating away and the smell of fresh brewed coffee infiltrated my apartment. That smell reminds me so keenly of my days as a child when I would stay with grandmother on her farm in the country every summer. That smell would usually be accompanied by the smell of frying bacon and baking homemade biscuits. She would be sitting at the table sipping on her coffee in her night gown with a hair net on. Oh, how I dearly miss her.

After I had awakened enough and imbibed enough caffeine I walked to the door to check on the weather. As you may know my windows are covered with milky white plastic. A grey, chilly, and dreary morning awaited me. I long for the sun and the warm days of last week. Spring will be here soon and I will rejoice in its arrival. This murky weather depresses me and I get a temporary seasonal affective disorder from it. It is as if the sun has decided to take a few days off and rest much as I did this weekend from school.

Well, I must get on the ball, grab a shower, and get dressed. My useless psychology class awaits with the noted bumbling instructor. I feeling a keen anxiety about school this morning and can’t put my finger on its source. Maybe it is the thought that I have much to do this week and must get busy. Good morning to you all and have a good day.

PS. I received word from Pipe Tobacco. He is extremely busy with grant writing and research and has not had time to update his blog. He is also experiencing computer problems at home. Let’s hope he can get back online soon. I have missed his literary efforts very much lately.

Another day dawns…….

Well, I made it to my morning class. I drug myself to the car and drove the fifteen minutes to school. My floorboards were filled with water from the rain last night and every time I hit the brakes the water would slosh forward onto my feet. It was very frustrating. So there I sat in class in a sleepy daze with wet tennis shoes. I did find out that my evening class is cancelled so I am going to head out soon.

On an interesting side note, I spoke to my World Literature instructor this morning. He told me that he used my essays on Gilgamesh and The Oresteia as an example of how to write good essays in MLA format to his English 102 class. That made me very proud. It made me beam with pride on an otherwise dreary morning.

I have decided to forego going to the river. It has been very warm lately and that most likely means the usual black men who drink and fish will be down at the river. I very much need some solitude. I think I am going to drive the 45 minutes to Waverly, Alabama and camp out by our pond on some land that my father owns. This is a completely secluded spot miles away from any habitation. It is over a hundred acres. The land is filled with old growth hard woods and pines. I am going to pitch my tent amid the pines upon the soft bedding of pine needles on the forest floor. We have yet to stock the pond with fish so I will not be able to go fishing. Dad is planning on stocking it this spring.

I have $20 dollars left from this week’s budget. I have been very frugal this week. I am going to buy a fifth of southern comfort and go drown my sorrows for a few days. I am going to smoke ample amounts from my pipe and sit by a crackling fire. I also have great hopes for a few good storms tonight even though that entails being stuck in my tent. There is nothing like the patter of rain and the rumbles of thunder to soothe my soul. I shall don my little radio, tune it to NPR, take a few stiff drinks, and throw a few more limbs on the fire. I also need to finish The Last of the Mohicans and will endeavor to do that as well. Good day and I hope you all have a good weekend. I am off to spend some very much needed quality solitude time with myself.

An adventure to the Chattahoochee…….

Wow….what a warm day. I have run the air conditioning unit all day it has been so warm. I also wore shorts and t-shirts. The summer time insects have made a brief reemergence and are calling outside as I write. There have also been numerous severe thunderstorm warnings this evening.

I’ve had a busy past few days. Most of today I spent catching up on school and organizing/re-writing all my notes for biology. I did get back my biology lab exam results this morning and I made 47 out of 50. One question asked what the arm like appendages on an amoeba was. I put amoeboid arm and the answer was pseudopod so there went two points. I also missed another point for simply writing electron microscope when I should have elaborated and written scanning electron microscope to differentiate between scanning and transmission electron scopes.

I have another grand journey planned for this weekend. I am going to spend some time tonight organizing my backpacking and fishing gear. I also splurged and took some money out of my emergency fund and went and bought some freeze dried meals for this weekend.

I am going to hike down to the river and at least spend two nights possibly Friday night and Saturday night. I hope to get some good fishing in and feed myself at least one meal off of what I catch. It has been awhile since I field dressed fish and cooked them so I need the practice. The freeze dried meal pouches I have already packed in my pack are 1 Spaghetti w/Meat sauce, 1 Chili Mac, 2 Granola w/Blueberries and milk, 1 Raspberry crumble, and 1 Blueberry Cheesecake. I plan on eating well and having a grand time.

On a side note, I see that the Alabama Legislature spent the majority of today’s session deciding and voting on the state amphibian. I hate to see them burdened with such pressing issues with all we have going on in our world. *sarcasm*

Well, I am off to go clean the ceramic filter in my water filter. I get so excited just by going through all my gear and organizing it. I may even don my pack and walk around the block just to check the balance and the weight. Good night and thanks for stopping by.

A proud man presents:

World Literature Essay Exam Scores

Well, I managed to get a 91 on my world literature exams. The instructor told me I was one of only two As in the forty person class. That made me very proud. I was very nervous as I haven’t had an English related class in almost 14 years and have never heard of the MLA format for essays. I will credit blogging for helping me grow in my writing abilities over this past year. It has greatly increased my vocabulary as well.

Sorry, I didn’t have much of interest to post today. I had a very busy day. I was working on a story about last night’s ordeal as a delivery driver for my father’s pharmacy but ran out of steam. I may get up the energy to finish it tonight or maybe not. My first priority is to go smoke a celebratory pipe and enjoy a fresh, hot, cup of gourmet coffee. The coffee pot is percolating loudly as we speak so I must go attend to more pressing matters. Good night and blog on!

Casting off the funks at last……

Motivation is sorely lacking the past few days. I realize now that it is my medication. When I am in a manic mood I get so much done and am very industrious. Lately, I’ve only had the motivation to sleep great deals. I shall play personal psychiatrist and discontinue my medication and see if that makes a difference. I have no side effects what so ever on my Risperdal Consta. I wish I could say the same for depakote as I had great hopes for it.

Last night, I drove all the way over to campus only to find out we didn’t have music appreciation this week. Our instructor had previous engagements. I knew this but somehow forgot so no results from my exam till next week. Did I mention my brain has been in a hazy funk? Yes, it has. I am a live version of Night of the Living Dead lately! lol

I had a psychology exam this morning and made 100 percent on it. At least the dufus worded the exam so we actually had to put some effort into it. This time he didn’t just give us what questions and answers would be on the exam. You actually had to read the chapters and study. I came! I marked boxes! I conquered!

Well, I have to have Beowulf read by this evening and must get off this computer and get to work. If this post seems disjointed you just have to understand my mental frame of mind lately. It has been a discombobulated mess. Good day. 8^)

No results…..

Sorry, no results as we don’t have class for the rest of the week. I drove all the way to the campus and forgot that we did not have class this week. Our instructor has a previous engagement. I told you I was in a hazy, murky funk today. I am now going to go take my medicine, crawl into bed, and sleep until lunch tomorrow. Good night.

Frustrations mount……

Today has not been a swell day. It started out with me over sleeping a slight bit. I woke up with the alarm clock blaring and it was 8 AM. I had set it for 7:30 AM. I am not sure if it is my new medication but I have been in a drowsy funk all day. Even small tasks seem insurmountable. I did make it to my morning biology class on time but had a hard time concentrating and taking notes. I just sat there scribbling into my notebook like a zombie.

After class, the ladies I study with wanted me to go out to lunch with them and then we were going to study. I reluctantly agreed as they were very persuasive. I completely fucked over my budget this week by doing this. They all wanted to go to a trendy sandwich shop in an antique market up the road. The food was very good but very expensive. I ordered a chicken salad sandwich and a small bowl of cheese and crab corn chowder and the total came to $10.95. I could have made chicken salad sandwiches for a week on what it cost to eat one sandwich there. I feel wasteful and reckless for doing this. I was just starving though and craving social interaction. It felt good that they all so persistently wanted me to join them.

Afterwards, we attempted to study but our study session broke down into gossiping and small talk. I sat there looking painfully bored and fidgeting with my mechanical pencil. I really needed to use this time to study. I finally closed my books and put them in my backpack and told everyone good day and good bye. I lied and made up an excuse to why I had to go. I had wasted enough time and really needed a nap before my evening class. It was also unbearably hot in the student lounge and I needed a change of clothes as I was wearing a flannel long sleeve shirt.

After leaving school, I drove by work to check on my schedule for next week. The young lady who works with me asked me if she could have some of my hours for a few days. She had a ton of bills come up and needed some money. I told her it was fine with me as long as the director approved. She is a single mother and needs the money much more than me. She got many of my hours this week and next. I was kind of relieved as I need a break from a very busy past few weeks. I am going to try and concentrate on school for the foreseeable days ahead.

It is now late afternoon and I am still in a hazy, drowsy funk. I crave crawling back into my soft bed and sleeping until morning but I can’t. I still have one more class to go and that is music appreciation. I don’t want to miss that as I will get the results from my second exam tonight. I am nervous and apprehensive about it as it was several essay questions and I hope I did well. Keep your fingers crossed. I will post my results tonight before I go to bed.

The first signs of spring……

The daffodils and bluebonnets are blooming in earnest in the yard. The lawn is also turning green again. It got up to 75 degrees today and was very warm here. I so wanted to share pictures of the flowers and almost went out and bought a digital camera at Wal-Mart. I held my paycheck in hand and debated over it. My better nature got the best of me though. I deposited that amount into my savings/emergency account. It would be silly of me to buy a frivolous camera just to post pictures to a weblog. I feel defiant tonight in that I resisted the urge to impulse buy.

Tonight I had an exam in World Literature. It was 100 multiple choice questions and they were quite tricky. I have no earthly idea on how well I did. I will find out Wednesday night. I did take the time to go over every answer a second time but caught myself second guessing a lot. The questions on the exam were like this:

The epic of Gilgamesh is believed to have its origins around ______________.
A) 400 BC
B) 1200 BC
C) 2700 BC
D) 3500 BC

Much ancient literature was passed down______________________.
A) Orally
B) Through transcription.
C) Clay tablets.
D) On scrolls

There you can get an idea of what was asked and how it was worded.

Tomorrow, I have my early Biology class and must not dick around on the web tonight. I need to get to bed at a rational hour and will endeavor to do so. I am now off to go take a shower and fix a bite to eat. Left over barbeque it is! Yum.

A whirlwind of a week……

I debated many times on putting this blog back up this week. I was having a lot of issues concerning it and my illness. I have been under a lot of stress lately. This week has been exam “hell” for me; a total of three exams in just a few days. On top of that, I had to work a lot. I am proud to say that I weathered the storm and made it through.

I did schedule a meeting with my psychiatrist this evening. Me and mother are going to drive down and see if she will give me something for anxiety and a racing mind. I have to find a balance between my mental health and the stress of school and work. I need help and cannot just do it by sheer will power alone.

Mom is going to treat me to Red Lobster after my consultation. I look forward to a good meal and time for us to talk. She insisted on going for support even though I tried to dissuade her from going. She knows very well what I am going through and understands where most do not. I insisted on driving though as she drives like a senior citizen.

I do not like whiny posts so I will close with saying that I am stable other than a few issues of paranoia. School is going well and things are moving along nicely. I am glad to have a long weekend break though and will catch up on my sleep and rest the next few days. No goddamned books or studying for two days at least and then I have to prepare for an exam on Monday. Good day and good bye for now.