The Legend of the Sleeping Man...

It was 5 PM when the phone rang. I was sound asleep and awoke bumfuzzled. Maggie was sleeping beside me and immediately and alertly ran to the phone when it rang.

"Have you made it?" I asked thinking it was my father when I picked up the phone.

"It is your Uncle Charlie you ding head!" Charlie exclaimed laughing.

I laughed in turn and told Charlie I was sound asleep.

Charlie apologized profusely about waking me up. I assured him it was fine and that I needed to get up anyway.

"I will be there in a few hours," Charlie told me. "Horsefly is still watching his movie. What do you want to eat?"

"Just get the chicken tenders meal at KFC when you go to get Horsefly's supper."

I wanted to make it easy on Charlie. Charlie told me he loved me and he would be here soon as soon as he could. I had told him I was a little shaky this afternoon.

A Delicious Supper and This Morning's Agenda...

Dad called me last night and said he had some supper cooked. He wanted me to come over and eat with him.

The kitchen smelled wonderful when I walked through the back door. Dad had cooked hobos or what is often called hobo stew in some circles. It is just a large foil packet of ground beef or stew beef, potatoes, carrots, onions, and celery -- seasoned and steamed to perfection. Dad makes a sauce of ketchup, mustard, and Worcestershire and spoons it over the mixture.

I walked down to the pantry to get some more Cokes because the coat closet had run dry and I saw a can of Hormel roast beef and I also spied a bottle of A-1 steak sauce. I asked dad if I could have them and he said sure. That was going to be my after midnight snack (if I could wait that long and I couldn't).

Let's Get This Guy on a Plane...

As I was leaving last night, dad said for me to call him at 3 AM and make sure he is up. That's an hour before my usual bedtime lately but I will be up quite a bit longer than that this morning. The plane leaves for San Francisco at 7 AM and dad wants to be at the airport plenty early.

"I will pick you up at 4 AM and that will get us to Atlanta's airport at 5 AM," I told my father. "That will give you two hours to get checked in and to make it through security."

Mom Arrives With Our Weekly Mexican Meal...

Speaking of Jet-Setting...

Dad flies out to San Francisco on Saturday. It is his cousin Johnny's birthday and dad promised him he would come. He broke the news to me tonight during the much-needed medication ritual.

"Now, I am going to leave Charlie $150 of your money for you to have fast food meals every night," Dad told me. "Charlie will treat you well and take good care of you. I will be back next Friday."

Charlie will take damn good care of me...  was what I was thinking and musing in my thoughts.

I am going to miss my father, but I grew very excited about the prospect of having Charlie administering my medications. You can bet your bottom dollar that Charlie will be here at 9 PM sharp every night with medications, food, drinks and lots of love. The Magster will be elated to see him every night for a week as well. He is the beta dog after all.

Boo! Where is the Ectoplasm?

I don't believe in the metaphysical or supernatural but found this ad intriguing...

Comment Replies...

Blogger Sharyn Bellah said...

Your dad could bring one of those Diazapam injectors. They seem to work well on the Intervention patients. How have you been doing since Miss Martha's been gone? What about your dad?

Andrew Replied...

I would just adore some Diazapam injectors. We could fly around the world then. lol

A lot of dad's time was spent keeping my mother going with all her health issues. Now, he has a very quiet house with not much going on except the drone of the television. He seems to be doing okay, though. Time heals old wounds as they say.

I miss mom everyday. We were very close and I now don't have a buddy to go get chocolate shakes at Sonic or trips to Auburn to hit up the bookstore or watch movies at the multiplex. Not a day went by when my mother wouldn't call me 2 or 3 times a day. My phone has rarely rang since my mother's death and it is uncanny feeling.

This is me today!!!! LOL

The Royal Princess of Egypt...

Dad was being totally silly, witty, and sarcastic tonight. He sat on the couch giving me my crazy meds as I sat in the recliner next to him. I couldn't discern whether he had been drinking or not. He was acting awful happy tonight. He's a happy, silly drunk. I was a tear in your beer type of drunk. Alcohol depressed my already depressed brain to even deeper lows and deeper depths of despair.

Dad finally gave Samantha (his cat) her royal titles tonight as dad does with all our pets. We brainstormed together for her name. It took him long enough. She is Empress of India and a Royal Princess of Egypt.

Don't Let the Last Chance Get Lost...

"I want to see the Great Pyramids of Giza before I die," my father told me as he was daydreaming.

"GO!" I adamantly exclaimed. "Go while you still have your health and your money."

"I am seriously going to think about it," my father said. "Would you go with me?"

"Can you imagine me having an anxiety attack on the plane and then us forgetting to bring my crazy meds?"

We both laughed. It was a very plausible situation, though.

"Get your jet-setting cousin, Jean, to go with you," I told him. "She would jump at the chance."

The Quest for Crazy Meds...

"I would never in a million years thought I would outlive your mother," my father solemnly said as we drove in mom's car to dad's house. Dad's CR-V has another headlight out and dad didn't want another ticket for the same reason. He's already gotten one.

"I can't believe I almost forgot your medications as well," he also said. "I am bumfuzzled tonight."

My father is a jerky, swervy, snatchy driver and it was making me carsick something terrible. I felt I was about ready to blow chunks like Horsefly does. Thankfully, we arrived at my parent's house soon enough. I had just eaten a Marie's three meat and four cheese lasagna meal and it was sitting very heavy on my stomach.

The reason for all this trouble was that Dad had left my medications in his CR-V so we drove over to get them. My ever social father needed a copilot to jib jab with.

"I'll drive us home," I sternly told my father aggressively as he walked back to mom's car after securely locking his Honda.

Needless to say, I was glad to get back to my house as the urge to vomit left as quickly as it came.

Breakfast Anyone?

Today's Word is Rain...

We were just caught in what can best be described as a gulley washer and it looks like it isn't going to let up any soon if you are looking at the radar. Man, did it rain hard for about 30 minutes. This type of weather curtails going out of the house when you have a roof over your head and air conditioning. It also helps to have some food in your fridge as well. You don't want to make run for the border (Taco Bell) in this kind of weather.

Computer Bliss...

At the moment, I am "playing" with all my new "toys" from last night that were delivered. I can now use Google Chrome with my laptop and watch videos on YouTube with it as well. I can even run quite a few game emulators. Before, they were a choppy memory hungry mess. I didn't get to bed until almost 6:30 AM this morning I was so enthralled and fixated.

She's Such a Neglected Dog...

Maggie has learned that by whining and whimpering she gets an instant reaction from me. I am always worried she is in some kind of pain or duress. She was mewling this morning when I realized I hadn't got breakfast started. She was fine and very quiet after our cheese eggs and grits. She got back on the bed and went to sleep -- her belly full at that moment. Now she is whining because she has to go potty and it is pouring down rain.

"Sweetheart, I can't control or change the weather," I said to her.

She finally flew out the dog door like a bat out of hell. It took a record 2 minutes for her to tinkle. What do dogs do when they get wet? They shake all the water off. I'm glad Maggie was in the laundry room when she did that.

Two For One...

After we went grocery shopping last night, my father asked me to come out to the car when he parked at the curb. Whoopee, I realized some of my computer parts were here.

"I was worried you wouldn't go get your groceries if you knew your parts had arrived," my father told me.

I have pulled an all-nighter playing with my new toys. Dad loved how excited I got. Christmas in June is what I told him. We went back inside so my father could see what I ordered. It was my ergonomic keyboard for my PC gaming computer and SODIMMs for my laptop. I still have some parts arriving for the computer I am building for my father.

"I wish you would get this excited about cleaning your house," my father told me snarkily.

"That's what my uncle Charlie is for," I replied with a Cheshire grin. "He cleans and then I keep it clean. There's a method to our madness."

Charlie had run out of stuff to do when he traditionally cleaned last Sunday night. He bragged on me to my father as they were walking out my front door to leave. Sometimes, all I need is just a little help and encouragement. No derision please.

They messed up my parts order but it wasn't a show stopper. It was to my benefit. They sent me 4 gigs of laptop memory when I only ordered 2 gigs. The price wasn't doubled as well much to my relief. I got a two for one deal.

What's Up? Ah, Just Some Marie Callendar's Lasagna...

We had a short visit tonight at Kroger. I went back to plan A and my total was only $69 dollars. Dad offered and was kind enough to buy Maggie's freeze dried venison and turkey dog food. That stuff is expensive at $14.99 for a small bag. When I pay for it, it really eats up my budget.

No Jermaine tonight. We were pretty early tonight so Jermaine was probably arriving later on. I find him fascinating and good fodder for the blog. I will gladly take a few moments to talk to him when he catches me in his web.

"You seem very serious tonight," I told my father as we walked to our respective cars.

Usually, he is jesting and joking around. He was not bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this evening.

"I spent the day getting your mother's car ready to give to you," he said. "It is probably going to be July when I hand over the keys."

Dad said he wanted to get the 40,000-mile checkup and service at the Honda dealership in Lagrange. He also needed to get the headlight fixed on that Honda. Mom's car was certainly gorgeous tonight with a wash, a wax job, and all that entails detailing a car.

The Charioteer Rides Again in Her Chariot...

I saw this video tonight of mom delivering one of Helen's meals. I shed a few tears but was glad I still had that video.

The Kitchen Computer is Safely in its Case...

This Locomotive, an ALCO RS-3 Unit, has Seen Much Better Days...

Comment Replies...

glittermom said...
Get your parts yet?

Not yet. They will probably trickle in over the course of this upcoming week. I am very excited.

Computer Menagerie...

McDonald's Outdid Themselves this Morning...

I've eaten a heluva LOT of sausage biscuits since Charlie has been bringing Sunday morning breakfast these past few years. Today's McDonald's sausage biscuits were exceptionally superb -- better than any in memory. They were delivered hot and flavorful -- the sausage rich with just a hint of greasiness.

Charlie was all business this morning. He was a man on a mission and the mission was to deliver as many sausage biscuits to his friends as he could in the shortest amount of time possible. Horsefly was at home waiting for his breakfast. Charlie said this morning that Horsefly had started to eat buttery grits for breakfast as well.

A Roger's Barbecue Catfish Filet Plate...

And She Watches Ever Vigilant...

Last Chance Lost...

Ah, dinner rolls, mashed tators, English peas, and meatloaf

Dad told me last night that Helen called him late yesterday afternoon and asked for her old job back.

"She didn't even know your mother had passed away," he said.

Dad told her he could manage on his own now seeing he's the only person living there and let's not forget the cat.

"I was also tired of her having to borrow money all the time," my father added to the conversation.

I sure do miss Helen's meals, though. I mainly miss the Southern-style vegetables. Helen would cook 2 and sometimes 3 vegetables with her meals. The vegetables, though dad touts them as healthy, are laughable on the Marie Callendar meals.

Opulence Was Given...

I called Dad knowing he had arrived home from Alexander City and my niece's much-ballyhooed dance recital. I crossed my fingers just for good luck and gulped robustly as I punched his number into my cordless phone.

"Dad, I am all out of food and milk. Would you please fix me up a care package of Beefaroni out of your pantry and I wanted to get my Cokes for today as well."

The beefaroni are kept down in the pantry just for these types of occasions. Dad buys six a week. It is a carryover from when my mother did all the grocery shopping. I usually need them around Sunday and Monday.

"You've eaten all your food? I can't believe you've eaten all that food!" Dad said alarmingly.

"Drive over and I will give you something to eat and drink," he said with a sigh.

I should've been the one letting loose a sigh. I am 45 years old for Christ's sake. I don't need to be told when and what I can eat. I don't want to have to grovel for the scraps from my father's dinner table. (Evoke Auschwitz Mantra)

It was almost 10:30 PM by the time I was pulling out of my driveway for the short drive to my parent's house. My father goes to bed around midnight so I wasn't too worried about keeping him up.

When I drove over, I made sure to take the route by the police station so the traffic would be light. Be sure to buckle up for safety and to avoid $75 dollar traffic tickets. 20 mph is the speed limit along that stretch of road as well.

"Don't let the cat out!" my father hollered to me as I unlocked and opened the back door.

Samantha was ready to pounce, but I kept her inside. I picked the diminutive little cat up off the kitchen counter and put her in Dad's lap. That cat can jump to incredible heights.

I apologized profusely upon arrival at my father's house for some reason. My father was sitting in the den watching TV specifically the London disturbance.

"Go downstairs and get what you need," he told me. "Your Cokes are in the coat closet."

Opulence for me tonight is three microwavable bowls of Beefaroni and six Diet Cokes. I feel as if I have won the lottery jackpot.

What a Merl's Diner Catfish Plate Looks Like...

They still can't beat Roger's Barbecue, though.

May Blessings Be Bestowed Upon Us...

Papa had to be in Alex City by early this afternoon. He was scrambling to get me situated and to also get on the road as fast as he could.

"I'm at McDonald's," he said. "What do you want to eat?"

"Just get me the Big Mac combo meal," I told him.

"A number one?"

"Yes, a number one combo."

Soon he came pulling up to my house with a handful of things. I walked out to help him. We also had to take my medications early as my father said he might not be back until 10 PM tonight. I apprehensively took them at 1 PM. I should have gotten Charlie to bring them. Hindsight is 20/20 as they say.

"They got the order wrong at McDonald's and gave me three giant Cokes," dad said as we took my medications. "Do you think you can drink them?"

"I certainly can," I replied with a smile.

"There is an extra Big Mac in there as well," Dad said. "Charlie said you would like that."

Nick Drake - One Of These Things First

For Sale...Nvidia GeForce GTX 260 Core 216...

It plays older games perfectly like Fallout 3 and The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion. I am only asking $40 measly dollars so it is a steal. I paid over $200 dollars new. It is in great shape as well. It takes up two slots inside your computer. You must have PCI-Express 2.0 or later. It also needs two 6-pin power cables from your power supply as well. Shipping is free.

Uncharacteristically Rare and Uncommon...

Maggie alerted me that my father had finally arrived. She was bouncing up and off the couch while barking. My little "child" has been feeling her oats today.

"I am so sorry I am so late in getting back," my father told me. "But I have a surprise! Charlie said you were running low on food so I swung by Kroger on the way over here."

Dad had a sack with two cans of Hormel roast beef, a can of beef broth, broiled in butter mushrooms, a carton of sour cream, and wide egg noodles.

"I am going to write down how to make Janice's beef stroganoff," he said. "You can have a good meal tonight or tomorrow."

"Also," Dad said. "I have you plenty of Beefaroni at the house."

We took my medications and then my father was soon underway again.

"I am going to bring your medications at 1 PM tomorrow," Dad said. "It just can't be helped. I have to help your sister in Alex City after lunch and I have no idea when I will be coming home."

I almost asked if Charlie could bring them, but I decided to let sleeping dragons lie.

I had asked my father for his astute common sense about hard-luck Richard and the rides he and his new wife wanted and dad said to quickly run in the opposite direction.

Charlie Brightens and Bolsters the Day...

We've got to keep the Calvary like this coming...

"I know it is the end of the week and you probably don't have much food," Charlie told me after arriving late this afternoon. "I got you a Big Mac combo meal and two drinks."

"Thank you so much," I told him. "I only have frosted flakes to last me until Monday."

"I just talked to your daddy on the phone and he said he is coming by your house in just a minute to give you your medications," Charlie then told me.

 The sweet words coming out of his mouth tickled my ears and warmed my heart.

Charlie had to spend some time with the Magster. Maggie wouldn't have it any other way. You should have heard her when Charlie pulled up in front of the house. It was like dignitaries had arrived for the Duchess.

"Yes, I love my Maggie Lou," Charlie told her scratching her back while Maggie wiggled in ecstasy on the couch next to him.

Like Greyhounds Out of the Gate...

Just the facts, Ma'am...

Maggie woke me up at 4 PM today. "You've slept enough," she seemed to be imparting. I don't know what made me sleep so long. I guess I needed it. It's been a busy past few weeks mentally, emotionally, and socially. I headed straight to the kitchen to eat a bowl of Frosted Flakes. I woke up starving. I swear I am going to be the next spokesperson for Malt-O-Meal Frosted Flakes.

A supposed friend on the blog and on Facebook befriended the lady I was talking about yesterday. Does anyone else think that was creepy? I felt they were keeping tabs on me and spying on me -- discerning the veracity of my blog posts. They got banned from my Facebook account and I urged my lady friend to ban them as well and she did. That still makes my blood boil thinking about it. It was a breach of trust.

My father is in Alex City about something to do with my niece's dance program. Certainly, they wouldn't be having a dance recital this early in the afternoon? It was most likely a ruse. He said he would call me when he got home which will probably be around nine and medication time. I feel I can't go that long tonight without my meds. I better suck it up and get ready for a long wait.

Dear Richard... Many of you may remember a lady I was dating several years ago named Laura. Well, I am friends with her ex-boyfriend on Facebook and he has moved to the Valley with his newly wed wife. He doesn't have a car and is living on one of the county roads around here. He asked me last night if I would give him rides to Kroger and Walmart sometimes. I said yes the big-hearted guy I am. I just have to send him my telephone number, but I am carefully debating over it at the moment.

Maybe my Schizoaffective disorder is at work. I seem very negative and paranoid today.

Sonya Kitchell - Walk Away

I Want to Become Entangled With You and Your Life...

I am wooing a certain beautiful lady on Facebook. We know each other from high school and have chatted quite extensively. We are taking things very, very slowly. I assure you this is no ruse for blog fodder and I assure you I am not being misleading to cater to my female readers.

I think she hangs the moon. She, too, is on medications for mental issues so we have both divulged our mental illnesses putting that out of the way well before the relationship may start.

My writings on Facebook lately have been to show her I am kind, intelligent, sensitive, and caring -- a good person to start a relationship or friendship with.

Who knows what can or will happen? At least, we can be friends first and foremost.

Maybe It is Time to Retire Or Maybe Not...

My father had bags under his eyes tonight he was so tired. He came running across my yard under a black umbrella all the while Maggie greeted him at the door. A steady soft rain was falling.

"How was your day?" I asked as he plopped down on the couch.

"It was nonstop mayhem all day. The phone was ringing off the hook and the pharmacy technicians asked me a hundred questions all day long."

"Have you thought about finally retiring for good?" I asked.

"I need the extra income," he told me like a broken record.

Injections "R" Us...

"I was trying to explain to my daughter yesterday that guys can be cheerleaders, too," my nurse Rebecca told me this morning. "That's how they can throw the girl cheerleaders into the air."

I smiled a very warm smile. Ah, the innocence of youth...

I brought my nurse's, Rebecca's, children a present today. I brought two of those gyroscope spinners which are so popular now. You can spin them on your thumb and they won't fall off for the most part. You just have to keep them spinning. The pharmacy is selling them for $15. I charged them to my account. I showed Rebecca how to use it.

"The kids will just absolutely love these," she said giving me an abbreviated man hug.

I hurried back to the pharmacy to relay my next appointment card to my father and to head back home.

"Hopefully your computer parts will arrive today," my father said encouragingly as I was getting two Sprite sodas out of the pharmacy drink cooler.

"We can only hope," I told him. "I will be thrilled to death!"

It is going to be a very big order with lots of parts -- probably several boxes. UPS will leave it under my parent's portico as they usually do. The laptop SODIMMs and keyboards will probably come first.

Sing Me a Bedtime Lullaby...

Dad called me around 9 PM. He sounded like he had one too many. This is becoming more and more common. He knows he has the gene -- his uncles were terrible, notorious drunks. He was drinking a glass of wine when I was over there seeing my niece and nephew.

"Your shots in the morning so get up bright and early," he told me sounding jestful and happy.

"I need some sleep," I said to myself this morning around 4 AM as I wearily sat in my recliner in front of the harsh glow of the television in my dark den.

I had terrible trouble getting to sleep last night. I couldn't wind down after a very busy day. My grandmother always said a very warm glass of milk will put you to sleep. I tried it and was asleep in 30 minutes. I think it was more of a placebo effect than anything. Maggie was snuggled up against me and her rhythmic breathing helped immensely.

Juggling Jermaine...

Blogger glittermom said...

Is Monday the only day you can shop? Maybe if you went a different day you wouldn't get waylaid by Jermaine...or is he a daily regular at the store....

Glittermom,

I shop Monday night. Dad doesn't like to shop Tuesdays and Thursdays cause he worked all day. He does his shopping on Wednesday night. This limits our options.

Jermaine usually comes in every night according to one of the cashiers. She said he drives them crazy as well. It's his social outlet and meal for the day. I have an ex-girlfriend who works in the pharmacy and she says that they all scramble out of view when he comes in. Jermaine is a good guy. He just has the gift of the gab and will talk to you for 10 minutes without relent. I think he craves a social outlet. Jermaine is handicapped both mentally and physically and I wish more people realized that.

Andrew

Jimmy James...

I just have left my parent's humble abode. I was visiting with my sister and her two children. My sister has the week off from work and is staying a few days with my father with grandchildren in tow.

Grant, my nephew, had caught a bonanza of giant black locusts out in the back yard and was keeping them in plastic cups. We started to think of names that we could name them.

"Name one of them Jimmy James," I told my nephew.

Jimmy James is Charlie's nephew and a superb craftsman. He is also a firebrand.

Charlie and my father just burst out in outrageous laughter. I was chuckling myself. I don't know what got in me to say that.

"Is Jimmy James ever going to come and do my train room?" I then asked Charlie in an opportune moment.

"He's disabled now and is not working," Charlie replied. "Your father now doesn't want the closet torn out."

I glared at my father with my eat shit and die look.

Harumppf... We'll see about that...

Charlie and the Magster...

Born Again A New Man...

And we ain't talkin' religion here...

It is coming to the time of the day where I start to falter and fade. It is almost 6 PM and the pharmacy closes at 7 PM. Dad will soon head my way after a brief visit at home to gather himself, change clothes, and to get my sodas. My attention span is already shot to hell and I am very flighty in my activities.

Then starts a new beginning to the evening and the day when my father arrives around 9 PM. I will be reinvigorated for the day -- like Jekyll and Hyde. My medications begin streaming into my blood from the lining in my stomach in an hour. I can easily focus on all my computer endeavors -- writing, reading, and playing games. My outlook on life becomes brighter and more enlightened as well.

I've been staying up to around 4 AM (about all I can muster to stay up) to maximize the time I am awake and medicated. It also minimizes the time I have to wait late in the next evening for my father. Sleeping in like a time-warp.

I do have another caveat to look forward to this evening. Maybe some of the computer parts I have will have arrived. I can't wait to try out that new RAM in my new laptop. Will it make that big of a difference?