Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Little Dog, Big Wind

My ex-wife was extremely prudish about things. Our little Boston terrier had a flatulence problem and it embarrassed her. We tried different dog foods to no avail. One night, I and my ex-wife were laying in the bed reading. Otis, our dog, had snuggled under the covers between us. His little problem reared its ugly head. He let loose one of the most nasty and odorous “gifts” he had ever bestowed upon us.

“Jesus, Rachel!” I cried laughing. “You need to go check your drawers. That was nasty.”

“Grumpy,” She said as she blushed and hit me with the book she was reading. “That is not funny. You know that was not me.”

“I don’t think that little dog could have done that,” I replied. “That took a much larger person and it was not me.”

“Well, if I would have done that then I would have blown a hole in my panties,” Rachel said.

We both burst out laughing. I laughed so hard it hurt. Rachel was crying by the time our outburst had started to die down. Otis poked his head out from under the covers looking to see what had caused so much commotion.

“I love it when you can lighten up and laugh,” I said.

Rachel leaned over and kissed me on the lips.

“Don’t you ever blame that dog’s little outbursts on me again,” She said as she smiled and looked at me sternly at the same time.

I rolled over and pulled the covers around me. I went to sleep with a smile on my face. Who knew what fun could come out of little packages such as Otis. I miss that little windy dog.

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