Ferret came by the house this afternoon on the search for cans for his money for recycling effort. I do drink a lot of sodas and told him to check the trash can. I walked inside and got him a trash bag to put them in. George was right about Ferret being on the great aluminum can hunt.
“I never thought I would be caught digging in your trash,” He said with the funniest look on his face when I walked back out.
I couldn’t help but bust out laughing loudly and then patted him on his shoulder.
“Are you still drinking that mouthwash?” I asked.
“Man, that shit is all I can afford,” He replied. “I can’t afford the good stuff.”
The good stuff for Ferret is Natural Ice beer. I had let Maggie out and she went off chasing one of those gigantically large black Texas grasshoppers that have showed up in my yard this summer.
“Yo dog gonna eat that damn thing?” Ferret asked.
“If she does then it will be one hell of a bitter taste in her mouth,” I said as Maggie carried the grasshopper over to me and sat it down at my feet. She looked up at me like, “Ya hungry? Lunch is served.” The grasshopper once again struggled to get away making a hissing noise as Maggie pawed it. Those things are fucking huge and clumsy.
Ferret managed to gather a grand total of fourteen aluminum cans out from my trashcan.
“How much money will that get you?” I asked curiously.
“Oh, about a goddamn quarter I think,” He replied. “I need to find enough for seventy five more cents.”
A bottle of mouthwash at Fred’s costs a $1.09 with tax for 2 liters.
“Man, if I had the money, I would give you enough to buy some beer,” I said. “But I am under the ‘John no drinking plan.’ Dad won’t even give me a dime. I hate to see you drinking that mouthwash.”
“Well, I am going to hit the dumpsters behind the shopping center,” Ferret said. “Sometimes, you get thirty or more cans out of them.”
I told Ferret goodbye and then he strolled on down the street in his quest for that elusive $1.09 to get trashed tonight.
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