Sunday, February 07, 2010

It’s All Relative!

I had a tough night last night with my schizophrenia.  I was feeling agitated and antsy, and I kept hearing this sound like bugs getting squashed on a windshield.  It was disconcerting to say the least.  It is all relative, though, and it shows you how far I’ve come when last night’s bad night would have been a good night a few years ago.   I kept trying to tell myself that.

Mom and dad threw a party last night at their house.  I wasn’t feeling well and wanted a few cokes so I called.  Mom had had a little too much champagne.  

“I’ll put your cokes out on the porch,” she said drunkenly. 

I laughed despite my mental anguish.  Mom sounded so funny over the phone.  Well, I drove over and in a sack were six caffeine free diet cokes.  Six diet Grapico.  And six diet Sunkist!  Mom needed to get drunk more often!  It was like a crack addict finding a twenty dollar bill on the sidewalk!

Well, mom called at 12:30 AM.  I had been asleep an hour and let the answering machine pick up.

“Did you come get your three Grapico?  And your anti-biotic?”

I then called her back intrigued.  What was this talk of three Grapico and anti-biotics?

“Mom, you gave me 18 drinks!” I said laughing.

“Oh my!” mom said. “Your daddy would have killed me if he knew!  I must have been out of it.”

“Yes, you were,” I said, smiling. “You were three sheets to the wind.”

“No wonder I have a headache!”

“Do you know what time it is?” I asked her.

“No,” she replied.

“It’s after midnight.”

“Oh dear!” she said. “Let me let you go back to sleep.  I am so sorry.”

LOL! I love my mother, but she can be so scatterbrained sometimes!

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