“Let me look at you!” dad said during my trip to get my diet cokes. “You look so good! You look nice with that shirt on and your khaki pants.”
I was just beaming with pride. This made me so happy for him to say this in such a way.
“I’m going to be a rat’s ass!” dad told me. “We are getting you cleaned up and back in school!”
4 comments:
This still makes me uneasy, your dad controlling your life. What about schizprhenia makes you not take care of yourself?
Mary E., I don't see it as controlling -- as helping. I was not taking good care of myself. A friend of the family told dad I looked like I was dying. This sent up alarm bells within the family.
I guess it can best be described as a malaise or apathy. I just lost the will to live or take care of myself. I think this happens with a lot of homeless mentally ill people as well -- causing them to be ostracized and scorned. They just don't have family to step in and help -- and I just see dad as helping. He just wants to see his oldest son do well and to live a good life. I certainly don't see anything wrong with that. That's what families should do. Sorry for preaching.
I haven't written in a while but I'm sorry that you've had such a rough time of it. This illness is such a stealer of lives!
I'm glad to hear that you are starting to come out of it and hopefully with the new support your Dad is providing and a med overhaul you will be back to your functioning sassy self.
impromptu, thank you and bless your heart. I really am feeling much better. Today, I am playing mindgames with myself -- the prisoner mindset. I am playing a game wherein I am a prisoner in my own home and must preoccupy myself. I am finding myself online more and taking a more active blogging life again. Bless your heart and I hope this finds you well!
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