I stood my ground last night telling dad that my doctor’s orders where to not take the medications without a visit to her first. This diffused the situation somewhat getting a professional involved. I told him to call her and talk to her and if she said to take them then I would. Dad was so pleading, though. It was almost pitiful. “Do it for my birthday!” he kept saying. The peer pressure is almost incomprehensible. “I can’t take the police showing up at my door about you acting crazy,” he also said. When have the police ever had to come to his door about me? I told him I loved him and asked calmly for him to leave – that I needed to go to bed. I have a busy day of work ahead of me and plan on working really hard to make up for my lapse yesterday. I feel much, much better this morning.
I also talked to my brother on the phone last night about what has been going on. We are not very close and only talk maybe once a year, but he was very earnest in wanting to hear what I had to say. “I don’t want to get caught in between you and dad, though,” he told me. “But I am glad you are listening to your new doctor. I was aghast at the amount of medications you were taking previously as well. I thought you must be seriously mentally ill by what dad had told me and for your medication levels to be so high. I am sorry for getting involved.” I told my brother I wanted him involved and for us to be closer – that I needed his help.
Oh, Dear Caramel…
Stacey kept Caramel for me last night. I HAD to get a good night’s sleep and I couldn’t take the puppy whimpering all night. Stacey was overjoyed to do this. Yesterday, Stacey went and got some Wee Wee Pads for the puppy and we put them down in the laundry room. Luckily, the puppy has been using them to go to the bathroom. I am hoping with Maggie’s influence and teachings, she will soon learn to use the dog door. Maggie naturally took to using the dog door without having to be taught. I was lucky on that regard.
Maggie’s motherly instincts have really kicked in, though. It is very endearing to see her dote over that little Boston Terrier. She will herd her around the house and will whine and whimper when the puppy whimpers as well. Maggie would have made a good mother if I would have let her have puppies one time. Maggie seems to be very worried and concerned about our new addition not fitting in just yet. It will just take time.
Well, I am off for work. It is 4:30am and I better get my lunch fixed and head out the door. I know I will have lots of work to do this morning.
23 comments:
I'm so very proud of you Jonathan.
You did beautifully! On your own you faced him once again and just explained the facts. By offering him such a rational option, what could he say?
What an outstanding move, dear! I am thrilled for you! You SHOULD be walking tall - just for keeping such a rotten situation from turning into a complete disaster!
I just can't explain how good it makes me feel to see you doing such a perfect job defending yourself.
So, so proud!
Grannie
Oh Andrew I missed so much during the day yesterday. What a hard one you had, but don't let this defeat you. I think your new dr sounds wonderful and seems to have done a world of good for you. I am not sure exactly what your dad is trying to do, but I am worried about what is going on there. I think for the most part you did well and the glitch was probably quitting the 3 mg. cold turkey. You have been mediated for so long that your body will need time to adjust and that along with the pressure and stress of what your dad is doing, plus the lack of sleep and the new addition to your family would cause some anxiety. Today is a new day, clean slate, start over. It is all a learning curve in dealing with your father. I think maybe if your dr spoke to him or your brother, that might help. Mull it over and see what you think. You are doing great! Keep up the good work and stay positive. Even if you had to stay on small doses of one or 2 meds, wouldn't it be worth it to have the quality of life you have been experiencing for the last 2 months? There is no shame in that Andrew, you have come so far.
Kudos to you for standing your ground. I was really worried yesterday and I'm relieved to know you're doing better. Take one day at a time. :)
I am so happy that last night worked out well for you. I am just totally confused about your father. Why must he insist on heavy dosage medications? Now that your brother is involved somewhat, this may be an easier change for you. Stay the course of action with your new doctors.
Thanks to Stacy as well in her help to you. Have a great day, Andrew. Do not overwork yourself and I am anxiously awaiting to read your next blog on how today is going to be for you.
I am so proud of you, Jonathon. You handled the situation beautifully. How smart to get your brother involved. Way to go!!
I am relieved it went so well. Standing up to your father is tough for you but you are doing it. That new doctor of yours sounds great. It's good to have her in your corner. I'm glad you had a chance to talk to your brother as well. If he is smart, he understands there are two sides to a story (and then the truth in the middle somewhere). Have a great day Jon. I can stop worrying about you for now.
You handled this like a pro. Still on speaking terms with your family, too, but you've definitely established a boundary.
Now a break for a Boston Bull story. My supervisor at work had a Boston Bull. One Fourth of July morning, the dog was having an awful struggle getting into the house though the dog door? Why? Somehow it had stolen a whole barbecued chicken and was trying to bring it home.
WAY TO GO! We all are soooo proud of you taking a stand and setting some boundaries for your dad. That was a wise decision telling your brother what has been going on. Now, just keep YOUR doctor in the loop and next time he tries to cart you off to the old doctor take a stand and tell him NO, you have a doctor! Seems the threat of getting the police involved got his attention.
Stacey was a sweetheart taking the puppy for you so you could recover from all the hoopla that happened yesterday.
Have a great day!
I too am proud of you! You got past this "bump in the road".
We all have them Jonathon, little bumps, big bumps. You handled your dad very well. Talking to your brother is also a great idea. If you don't chime in all he knows is what he hears from your dad. As I will be shutting down the computer for sabbath this evening, Have a great Friday/Saturday. I shall miss reading, but will be back first thing Saturday after sunset.
I am glad that you let him know about your doctor and that you are going by what she says. I wonder about your father and his manipulations. He sounds more mentally ill than you do quite frankly. Hang in there, buddy. Today is a different day. One day at a time and sometimes one hour at a time will get me through the day.
*claps*
Bravo. I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself. I know how hard that must've been. I'm glad your brother is somewhat in the mix although it sounds like he may have the same issues with your dad as you do in some ways.
Now. When are we going to get some pics of Caramel? :D
Have a great day today!
We're on your side, and I'm so happy to read this today! From the sound of it your brother did the right thing by listening to your side of the story. I'm relieved that you called your own doctor, I was really worried about you yesterday. I understand your brother doesn't want to get in the middle but, your Dad did that, not you. I hope maybe he can talk some sense into your Dad and help get him to back off on you, or at least convince your Dad to let you follow the recommendations of your new doctor without his interference. I'm sure it's not easy to be pulled in so many directions. Hang in there and take good care!
Way to go jonathan! stand your ground, but in a nice way. bravo!
best,
mark :-)
I am so glad you were able to stand your ground with your dad..I was worried about you since yesterdays episode with him..Dont try to go off your meds with the new dr..Follow her directions and you will be fine..She will probably be the one to help you get your disability switch from your dad to you once she sees you are capable of handling it..
I was so surprised about how bad your posting made ME feel--I was so worried about you! It almost ruined my day hearing about your dad. I also want to pass on my experience with court ordered commitments and declaring you mentally incompetent. It was very very hard for my father and I to get my mother committed, and we could only do it because she was actually in the hospital and repeatedly suicidal and disregarding all doctors' orders. The police don't like to get involved in these matters, and if the person (you) are curteous, sane, and coherently explain the situation, they won't take you in. The legal system has really changed post 1970s so as to make it very difficult to lock up "mentally ill" people. I say all this to give you some peace of mind about the threats your father is making about calling the police on you and declaring you mentally incompetant. In my experience, he would not stand a chance.
I am soooo proud of you, standing your ground! I'm surprised Dad didn't call your doctor and gave up so easily! Good for you, talking to your bro. He could be a valuable asset in the war against over medicating.
I'm glad it went fairly well last night. And I can't wait to see pictures of the puppy!
Sir:
I am glad things went well for you!
PipeTobacco
http://frumpyprofessor.blogspot.com
A rousing standing ovation coming from my house!
I am very happy that you were able to assert your self. You are so able to do more than you would ever think.
Jonathon, has anyone ever suggested that your father needs psychiatric help? I think he has some pretty serious problems.
A huge hug for you.
Jan
What a relief.That went better than I anticipated.I was worried for you all evening.You handled yourself well Jonathon.Communicating with your brother was a good move.
Your father sets off my heinky meter.How have your brother and sister allowed him to do this to you and your mother?And they themselves being doctors? The whole thing causes me to wonder how often this is happening in our society.Maybe one day you can team with your siblings and help your mom.Wouldn't that be grand?
Keep up the good fight my friend!
Billie
Dont let your fathers threats get you upset..there isnt really anything he can do.. If he has your electricity turned off you can easily get it back on in your name...money might get tight but once you get control of your own money things should work out for the better..no matter how much you love someone , sometimes it just better to let it go...
YAY!! You are taking control of your life again. Good for you:)
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