Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Euphoria City…

I took the post down about George.  It was just too racy.  George can be crass and I worry about posting our exchanges.  It’s guy humor and most of my readers are women.  (I put the George post back up.  Y’all tell me if it’s too vulgar or racy, or if it offends.  It is exactly what happened.)

I’ve had periods of Euphoria all day long.  It is very nice.  The alcoholic in me likes anything that makes you feel “high”.  I’ve spent most of the day chain smoking and smiling.  I’m not very verbose today, though.  I don’t know what  much to say. My injection is my “Soma”, and can make me quiet and withdrawn.

I wish I got more comments.  Only a select few people comment out of nearly 300 people visiting the blog every day.  At any given time, there are 4 or 5 people reading the blog and I am always disappointed when they leave without saying hello.  There is a recovery and sobriety lesson in there somewhere – not letting others dictate my feelings and moods.  I am off to smoke some more and read a book as I sit in front of this computer.

26 comments:

Becky said...

Never know what to say in comments....but as you say what can a quick HI hurt ?:)

Andrew said...

Thank you Becky! Hi back! I appreciate it very much.

Judy said...

I enjoy your blog so much. I like the way you write and love your honesty!!

Andrew said...

Judy,

Thank you! I really appreciate the support and the comment. You guys are going to make my day!

mxtodis123 said...

I enjoy your blog. Have been a reader for quite awhile, but really have been a lurker. You did make me very nervous at one point and I had to pipe in my two cents. I'm learning so much from you. My stepson is Schizophrenic and although he didn't drink alcohol, he did smoke marijuana. He is 25 and lived with us for awhile, but unlike you, he doesn't like to take his medication so he has been in and out of the hospital. They stabilize him, release him, and within a week or two he stops all meds. Then, a few months down the road, he's hospitalized again. This time they are not letting him out. He's been hospitalized now for almost a year...and even they have a problem getting him to take his meds. It's very sad. He used to pace the floors at night and smoke one cigarette after another. I never understood until I read your posts. Thank you for helping me to understand.

Andrew said...

mxtodis,

Thank you for sharing that story to me. I understand completely what your stepson is going through. I've been through similar situations myself as you have read. I really, really appreciated your comment. You added a lot to the blog today and it will not be forgotten!

justLacey said...

Wow, bet you didn't know how many people you help just by sharing your story,

Andrew said...

I hope so Lacey. I hope this blog is just not ego grokking. I get lonely and this is a safe place for me to talk about my issues when anonymous comments are off. I live in a little small town in the South are there are not a lot of mental illness self help avenues to explore. This blog is one of them.

You have meant so much to me over these past few years. Your comments consistently make me happy and make me smile. You have been a source of support when I felt I had none. Thank you dear soul and if there is ever anything I can do then just ask.

S said...

Hi Andrew,

While I usually do not comment, I love your writing and your honesty on a daily basis. I should say hello more often, and I will make an effort to do so!

Thank you for blogging!

Sandy

SOUL said...

here i am - to pay my whore tax.
i kid Andrew . just referring to the thing on facebook. that was plain ole funny. so much for claiming to be "quiet and withdrawn" i don't believe ya. :))

anyhow-- hello, and a happy nacho night to ya -
laterz-

Andrew said...

Sandy,

Thank you so much for the comment. I should do this more often! I wanted comments and you all are helping me feel better! I was just lonely today and wanted to hear from my blog buddies and friends.

Soul!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I didn't think you read anymore! Yes, It is nacho supreme night! Mom is bringing me a half order. She's already called me about groceries tomorrow. My biggest request was for two 2liters of Chek diet soda and 3 packs of Snicker's bars. "3 Packs????" mom exclaimed. Give a dog a bone! LOL Thank you for your comment.

Andrew said...

You all have really improved my day!!! Thank you! I was feeling lonely this afternoon.

- PT said...

I liked the George post and I like when you post about your conversations with him. Some of them are funny but that's just me.

Andrew said...

PT,

Thanks, I will consider putting it back up. I can be so insecure sometimes and don't want to offed anyone!

pattycakes said...

oh i guess im one of those who just drops by to read and then leaves i know what i want to say to you in my mind but dont always lol i dont know why . but i shall work on it . please dont take ur blog down. i love to pop in on yu every day
your a sweet man . keep up the good work , love the stories about george and his mom . your very lucky to have so many people in your life who really love and care about you .
have a great day
from pattycakes :)

justLacey said...

Andrew the only thing I ever want from you is for you to be well and do well. So simple. I know in the beginning it wasn't though.

Summer said...

You are a talented writer and story teller. I love reading you everyday. When you don't post, I have withdrawals! It's like reading a good book that you never want to end.

Look at Mom all dressed up like a lady. I bet she never goes out of the house without her make up on. A true Southern Lady!

Charlotte said...

I will make an effort to respond more often. :-) So glad you had an awesome day today!

J said...

Andrew,
I'm usually just a lurker but I've been reading your blog for years now. I love your writing and your photography, and I think you could really do something with your talents. Have you ever thought about creative writing? I bet you could write some really great personal essays with all your experiences. :)

It's Jan! said...

Hey, I'm so sorry that I have not bothered to leave a comment now and then...

I feel like a member of your family some days, of George's family other days. You are such a great story teller, I can hear you, loud and clear.

I've been hanging around for quite a while...some days I frown in concentration, some days I giggle...but every day I love reading about you, Mags and the gang.

Thanks for opening the door to your life. It is much appreciated and enjoyed!

God Bless,
Jan

This IS The Fun Part! said...

Hi Andrew,

So glad you're getting bunches of comments tonight! Can't ya just feel the love.

I don't see anything wrong with repeating your conversations with George. Of course, if he gets really dirty - a little editing might be in order.

Love the video of Maggie - as always! And your mom looks great!

Thrilled to hear you feeling so well again. And I can't believe the "hairy butt" comment! Thought I'd never stop laughing over that one!

Happy Wednesday!

Love Ya,
Grannie

Peg said...

I'm here. I read. Everyday. Sometimes I don't respond because I'm afraid the post will create just another email that you have to worry about.

God bless your work with AA. I hope that you feel God next to you, guiding you, leading you out of the darkness you fight day in and day out.

-- Peg

Gary said...

Hi Andrew,
Just want you to know I'm still an avid reader and a big fan of your blog. it's been a big help just knowing you are out there and I'm not alone fighting the demons of bipolar disorder.
Thanks again and say hi to Maggie!
Your friend in Canada,
Gary

Joy Heather said...

Andrew i am so glad you put it back up..it really made me laugh (i did leave a comment on it)..and i'm not only a woman (last time i looked)..but i'm a fairly old one....you are Real Andrew and thats what we all love about you..Never change your blog...especially not for anyone else...you & George are so funny.

PipeTobacco said...

Sir:

I enjoyed the George post, and I do not think it was overly racy at all.

PipeTobacco
http://frumpyprofessor.blogspot.com

Cheryl said...

I'm so glad you got so many comments. See....ask or mention it and you will receive!