Thursday, November 30, 2017

Running the Gamut of My Mental Illness...

"What is the biggest way your mental illness affects you?" my nurse, Rebecca, asked me this morning in a moment of candidness.

"I am constantly scared of being in mental misery and anguish," I told her. "That's is why I am so keen on and aggravating to my father about my medications."

"Blunted emotions and empathy, too!" I then blurted out and added. "I couldn't cry when my own mother died."

My injection was extremely painful this morning, but I didn't show it. I gritted my teeth and smiled -- stiff upper lip as the British would say. It would've worried Rebecca to death if I told her. I hugged her goodbye as Dee Dee met me at the door with my next appointment card. They take really good care of me at Kamath Medical.

"Can we beat Georgia twice?" Dee Dee asked of the SEC championship game.

"I'm already nervous," I told her faining interest.

I was also riding solo this morning. Dad was off of work by a fluke change of plans and left me to handle the injection on my own. I showed up at his house with the next appointment card and the receipt for the injection and he was so ecstatic about my being able to handle all of that on my own accord.

"You've come a damn long way, son," he told me as I stood at his back door.

"Medications at 1 pm or 2 pm?" I asked unabashedly and my father said that was okay.

I also urged him to call WOW! and see what the holdup is. That's been going on for a month now and I am tired of waiting. He said he would give them a call this afternoon.

A Shot in the Dark...


My father has this incredible and insatiable need to stay in control. I think it comes from running a pharmacy for 47 years. I am going to ask him to let me keep my medications and have him stop by every day to see if I am taking them as prescribed. That way I can take my morning and noon medications, and nightly medications as intended.  I know it is a shot in the dark, but I am going to give it the good college try. If I could just explain to him and convince him that it would increase the quality of my life tenfold.

2 comments:

skinny minny said...

I think that is a great idea! but maybe instead of giving you all of your meds to start y'all could set up in one of those weekly medicine holders a weeks worth and he give you that. My Mom has one that is labelled with the days of the week and morning breakfast lunch dinner and night slots. That way you can set it up and easily see plus instead of having a months ( or more) supply you would be limited to a weeks worth to start might be easier on your Dad. And Would make it easier to check on you taking not taking them especially if he came over daily to check and visit you and Maggie.

Jan said...

I was just going to suggest an electronic pill dispenser. Yes, I'm pretty sure that your father would balk at the expense, but in time and travel (plus your comfort) it could dispense your meds at appropriate times. I was just talking to a friend who uses one for her mother who lives alone and has dementia. Not only is it secure, but she gets an email if something is amiss such as she forgets to take her pills...

Just a suggestion...

Jan